My Family (TV Series)

The Art of Being Susan (2006)

Gabriel Thomson: Michael Harper

Quotes 

• Roger Bailey : Ah, that Abi! She's the best thing that's ever happened to me!

  Michael Harper : She's the only thing that's ever happened to you, Roger!

• Roger Bailey : I was thinking of trying to propose to her over a nice candlelit dinner.

  Michael Harper : Or you could smear her body with honey, take her out into the desert and wait for the ants to eat her alive!

  Roger Bailey : That doesn't sound very Abi-ish, but, er, let me give it some thought.

• Alfie Butts : [On the phone]  Harper residence. Oh, hello Lucy!

  [to Michael] 

  Alfie Butts : It's Lucy.

  Michael Harper : Hah! Tell her I'm not interested!

  Alfie Butts : [On the phone]  What's that? Cinema on Saturday night.

  [to Michael] 

  Alfie Butts : She wants to go cinema on Saturday night.

  Michael Harper : Forget it! Tell her I've got a date!

  Alfie Butts : [On the phone]  8 o'clock, by the box office. Oh, yeah, I'm sure that'll be fine. OK, bye!

  Michael Harper : Alfie, what are you doing? I told you I don't want to see her again.

  Alfie Butts : She wasn't asking you! She was asking me!

  Michael Harper : What?

  Alfie Butts : Well, what can I say? Women seem to find my sexually ambiguous persona irresistible!