fluffchop Reviews

Night of the Creeps (1986)

Night of the "Sleep"

[4/10 · 11 April 2024]

"Alien brain parasites, entering humans through the mouth, turn their host into a killing zombie. Some teenagers start to fight against them."

Ok so did anyone actually get killed by a zombie? People seemed to die when the parasites went in them. The zombies were so ineffectual they couldn't hurt a fly.

A dog can make a bus crash at low speed.

Everything feels like it's in slow motion.

This movie is so slow getting there and so off base with the romantic nonsense. This chick isn't into nice losers. She dating the head of the fraternity. She wouldn't give him a second look. And thus the romanticism of the mid to late 80s rears it's ugly head. We were bought up on this schlocky ideal of romance and it never played out that way in real life. This left many people completely broken hearted. It was so all pervasive that it even had to ruin what could have been a perfectly plausible horror film.

Instead we are left with this really boring character exploration rather than any genuine horror.

This movie sucks in a bad way. It takes so long getting there for no payoff. It's the longest 1hr30mins i've ever seen. Awful movie.

If you want to see something good from the 80s watch Killer Klowns from Outer Space (1988). It's all of the ham and cheese with none of the romatic crap.

The Gray Man (2022)

"we need more guns"

[8/10 · 10 April 2024]

"When the CIA's most skilled operative, whose true identity is known to none, accidentally uncovers dark agency secrets, a psychopathic former colleague puts a bounty on his head, setting off a global manhunt by international assassins."

This movie it much better than the description would suggest. It looks like a huge budget blockbuster but it's on Netflix. If they keep this up they'll bury other streaming services.

They have far too many locations which are little more than names on the screen. It becomes tedious.

It gets a little slow midway through but then picks up again for the second hour.

The chick with the bob hair is driving an AUDI and when she brakes for the tram she clearly has her feet on the clutch and brake pedals. Then later she shifts an automatic gearshift.

That sort of thing is just really sloppy for something of this budget. I didn't even bother rewinding to check because I was sure of what I'd seen. I thought oh yeah Europe could be a manual for sure which I found interesting. Then she shifts the auto shifter so no clutch in that car. It's one little thing I noticed that bugged me slightly.

It makes me laugh that the thing about James Bond in 1962 was that he has a license to kill. That quaint notion is just so far gone nowadays where everyone just kills everyone all the time for two hours of the film.

So on that note 100 gunmen can't kill one guy handcuffed to a railing in the middle of an intersection. It's crazy right?!

An ultimately enjoyable film, even if these sorts of things aren't your bag, which they're not really mine.

The Puppetman (2023)

almost completely stinks

[3/10 · 9 April 2024]

"The Puppeteer, a convicted murderer on death row, has always maintained his innocence, claiming that it was an evil force that controlled his body as he slaughtered his victims."

So to sum up this film almost completely stinks. The ending where they trick the trickster? What was that all about because it seemed like nobody got tricked and they used this stuff to close the movie with. It's a weak ending.

So you sit through an hour and a half of this dreck to finally see that the demon was alive and well in the chick.

The chick didn't show her tit's throughout.

There is zero comedy in the film.

Mile 22 (2018)

Not a lot of action for an action film.

[5/10 · 6 April 2024]

A small team of elite American intelligence officers, part of a top-secret tactical command unit, try to smuggle a mysterious police officer with sensitive information out of Indonesia.

So it's billed as an action thriller. It's not an action film like non-stop action nor is it much of thriller. Therefor it's more like a drama with action scenes and an overall what's going on Thriller feel to it.

So a die hard action fan won't feel this meets their expectations. I'm not really a fan of action films so it didn't bother me having some action peppered throughout around a thriller setting.

With the long runtime they could have done something to give insight into the main members of the team but they don't do that. Without that background you really don't care who lives of dies.

Bad guys just seem to be attacking them all the time as they blast their way through the neighbourhood.

It's a bit slow at times and no amount of sporadic shooting changes this feeling. Worth watching if you're a Mark Wahlberg fan which I casually am. I like him in everything he does.

It plays out like long levels of a video game. Shoot some bad guys, more pop up, shoot them, throw in a fist fight here and there.

So overall I'd call it a 5/10 movie.

Ghostbusters: Frozen Empire (2024)

They should have stuck with the chick movie line. Yet another paying homage to the past film.

[4/10 · 31 March 2024]

Just got home from the cinema. This movie was like when will it end. It's far too drawn out with very little plot to support it.

Dan Aykroyd was good in it. Evernone else phoned it in but they had little else to do given the plot was so thin.

I basically wasted my money on this film but the power was out at home and it was unbearable being without it.

They did nothing with slimer or the little marshmellow men. It's full of things that just went nowhere.

They barely caught any ghosts. It's really not a funny movie either. The orginal Ghostbusters was funny. This just seems like cashing in on a brand name now.

They should have continued the storyline they laid out with the female ghostbusters. That just ended after one movie when they had the sequel already set to go when at the credits they say has anyone heard of Zule?

We waited for ages and finally another ghostbusters, and it was afterlife. Sheesh, and now this one double sheesh.

To Catch a Killer (2023)

Super boring with far too much language and not enough action. It's a a crime drama not an action movie.

[2/10 · 31 March 2024]

The plot is ridiculous. Taking some random officer into the FBI when she's a drug addict and has been rejected by the FBI for being psychologically unfit makes no sense. She shouldn't be there. A better plot is that she's rookie at the FBI and this is her first case.

Lot's of pointless dialog and no action makes for a very boring movie. It's not worth watching this movie. It's a 4/10 at best because nothing happens throughout the entire middle of the movie.

The acting is restrained and very undramatic for a drama. The plot is nonsensical. How the chick manages to be in certain places all the time makes no sense.

A terrible movie with no redeeming qualities.

The Unheard (2023)

30 Hours you'll never get back! Not totally annoying but more so towards the end it's the most frustrating garbage you'll ever have the misfortune of watching.

[2/10 · 31 March 2024]

Not totally annoying but more so towards the end it's the most frustrating garbage you'll ever have the misfortune of watching. It really becomes an unwatchable mess which makes no sense whatsoever. I hated this movie the longer it went on the worse it got.

What's audio got to do with video tape flashbacks. It makes no sense at all. It's a stupid movie about what I don't know. There is a mother who was killed by some guy who she kills in the end. It takes nearly 5 hours getting there and another 5 hours to get it done.

I fell asleep so quickly watching it should be sold as a sleep aid. I re-watched the second half which I wish I never did as it just pissed me off no end waiting for it to get to the end. At nearly 30 hours long this movie is just far too much.

Wyrmwood: Road of the Dead (2014)

Yeah I didn't get funny whatsoever from this film. I don't know what people are talking about in the comments. It's just typically Australian behaviour, nothing funny about it

[4/10 · 30 March 2024]

Yeah I didn't get funny whatsoever from this film. I don't know what people are talking about in the comments. It's just typically Australian behaviour, nothing funny about it

Action Comedy Horror - A talented mechanic prepares to battle his way through hordes of flesh-eating monsters after his sister is kidnapped on the eve of a zombie apocalypse.

Tell me what was funny? There's nothing funny in this film. I don't think it's meant to be a comedy in any way shape or form. It's just a straight up drama. I don't even think it's a horror movie.

There's no nudity, nobody running from a killer. There is no killer on the loose. It's not a horror. It's just a little drama to me. Blood doesn't make it a horror. In the situation there would be blood, that's just drama taking place in that situation. There is nothing funny about it.

There's nothing scary or funny and that's what I like in a horror movie. So don't expect much from this film. It's just another boring zombie movie.

Totally Killer (2023)

It's like if Gen Z made a film about the 80s and no clue what they were doing, never lived through the 80s and got everything wrong. Imagine that and you have this film.

[6/10 · 24 March 2024]

No representation of Heavy Metal kids. In the 1987 metal was king. You would expect to see plenty of black t-shirts with bands on them.

Nobody is dressing up like Molly Ringwald. That's just crazy.

The flannel shirt and haircut with all of it the one length of her dad when he's young is straight out of 1994. Long hair wasn't like that in the 80s it was a lot more mullet like. Think hair bands or Mel Gibson in lethal weapon.

A big problem with this film is that it wasn't made in the Valley. If you're going to call it totally killer you would expect to see a big valley girl clique with 80s haircuts and hair. All they needed to do was view weird science to see how the 80s was. This movie is like they did no research and never lived through the 80s. Also the music was so mainstream 80s and no kids would listen to that.

Anyway. As a movie it's not sure if it's a time travel movie or a horror. It fails at both pretty much and doesn't have much if any comedy. Maybe I don't think much of this film. It's really pretty boring like if Gen Z decided to make a film about the 80s and had no clue whatsoever what they were doing. I know it's a stretch right :P.

The Collective (2023)

Mildly enjoyable little romp

[6/10 · 20 March 2024]

I don't know what crack pipe the 1/10 brigade were smoking from but you all need to step back from the pipe and learn to appreciate a good film.

This isn't a high budget film and yet it manages to be entertaining and very watchable.

There are clearly good guys, who kill everyone, and bad guys who kill everyone. So what's the difference? I don't really know because they're all pretty bad.

It leads us to the whole war on terror. It's an endless war with an endless budget that was started via the false flag 911 event that was planned even before they built the twin towers.

They made them with steel frames rather than concrete pillions. The reason being that concrete in New York was controlled by the mob. Okay. So that's just ridiculous right?!. Because all the other construction going on at the time had no trouble getting concrete. It's the cost of doing business. You simply buy the concrete.

No they constructed the buildings to collapse in a controlled demolition. That's how controlled by the elite guys society is. They planned this event.

It's like when Australia wouldn't support Bush invading Afghanistan in the early days. So they had another event which was the Bali bombing. Almost overnight John Howard had support from the people to support Bush in the invasion and we sent troops. Same thing going on right before our eyes.

So again who are the good guys and who are the bad guys. This movie doesn't go into the history of anyone. They simply exist already, as if one viewing was simply born into the world we see on screen.

So we side with the ones we are first exposed to as being in the right, and we clap as they kick the asses of the opposition.

Movie 43 (2013)

It's funny or tries to be but it's so conservatively American in it's humor.

[5/10 · 18 March 2024]

All this movie does is point out taboo subjects that Americans consider impolite to talk about. It just didn't seem all that funny. In fact it's just downright loathsome.

If you want to see how a comedy can bring up gross behaviour and be laugh out loud funny check out Someone Marry Barry.

This movie isn't really funny it's just trying to be gross like the shock of the grossness is somehow funny. It's not the same as being funny and it's get old after 10 minutes. They needed another joke.

Oh another segment, here again is the exact same joke, being gross to shock you like that is supposed to be funny.

All the ratings of 10/10 are just as ridiculous as those of 1/10. It's a definite 5/10 in that you may be mildly amused by some of it. The problem is it's all out of context and just jumps from one thing to another.

There is no story built up with characters to bond to and like. Therefore there is little to no enjoyment to be found in this film.

I guess if you find Jackass funny this is on that level of "humor".

The Best Man (2023)

It's a little slow and empty but a good watch nonetheless.

[4/10 · 17 March 2024]

"Mercenaries seize control of a remote resort hotel during a wedding and it's up to the best man, the groom and their drunken best friend to stop the terrorists and save the hostages."

Firstly the first half of the film takes an inordinate amount of time to actually get to the part where the mercenaries take over the hotel. During this time we are left wondering if the movie will ever get any better.

It's nice to have a few drinks it seems as they are in the hotel boozing it up before the wedding. There's nothing wrong with that but it's not really building up a story. Which lends itself well to the B-movie type movie this is.

Then it's time for action as some guys from the wedding parties past bust in and start shooting up the place. You wouldn't want to be a cook on this day as somehow they start with the kitchen staff.

Anyway the movie seems a bit bland, a bit dull, a bit lacking in substance and it's just a nice watch but nothing like a decent full on action movie. Sometimes a movie just isn't as good as the makers thought it would be and I guess they needed to pay the writers a lot more money or get better ones. Hey writing is a tough job but it's what makes or breaks a movie. At least that needs to be right or you've got a bad script and you end up with this sort of movie.

Dolph Lundgren's performance is memorable though. He's a great actor in anything. He brings a presence to anything he's in.

Thanks for reading.

The Sacrifice Game (2023)

Well crafted thriller with horror overtones

[8/10 · 9 March 2024]

Watch this one till the end. It's a worthy ride. It may seem slow but if you pay a little attention it's rewarding. It really is a game of sacrifice.

The lead child actress is great. I think one should expect greater things of her in the future should she chose to stick with acting.

The four killers are a great team of villains and what at first appears to be a team of thrill killers soon become pawns in their own game.

The suspense builds steadily as the story unfolds. There are subtle twists and turns as the film goes on.

The ending is interesting and rewarding for having watched.

Some films that are written and directed by the same person can be a bit so so, but this one works VERY well.

It's not your typical horror with blood, guts, nudity and gore which I love to watch, but more of a slower burn that gets more and more interesting the longer you watch.

Well worth the viewing 8/10

Thanks for reading.

Girl with a Gun (2022)

The most boring "action" film of all time.

[2/10 · 9 March 2024]

There's so little action it shouldn't be catagorised as an action it should be under drama. In which case it works as a drama but as an action film it's pathetic.

It's got some really boring and disjointed editing too.

I didn't enjoy the film.

I give it a 2/10 and that's generous.

There's so little action it shouldn't be catagorised as an action it should be under drama. In which case it works as a drama but as an action film it's pathetic.

It's got some really boring and disjointed editing too.

I didn't enjoy the film.

I give it a 2/10 and that's generous.

Best avoided as it's the most boring action film of all time.

The List (II) (2023)

It's a nice movie

[7/10 · 9 March 2024]

I really like the lead actress, I've seen her in another movie and she's just lovely.

The movie has the feel of a romantic comedy but doesn't follow the formula for one. So it's light hearted and fun but isn't as sappy as some can be. Not that there's anything wrong with those sorts of movies, we watch them because we know the formula and like it.

It's a good story that is very watchable and keeps you "engaged" ;)

It feels slightly long in the middle and perhaps lacks a bit of direction scriptwise. I liked it and think it promises to deliver what it claims.

Just enjoy the ride and maybe learn a little about being engaged to someone and how that may not work out. Some of us have been there.

A solid movie that is enjoyable and I give it 7/10 as in I'd watch it again.

Thanks for reading.

Unwelcome (2022)

Doesn't know what it's trying to be

[4/10 · 8 March 2024]

It categorised as comedy horror. It's certainly not a comedy. There is nothing funny about anything in it. There's not one laugh in it. A comedy horror is Shaun of the Dead. This should have been like that movie but it's not.

It's not that much of a horror either. It follows none of the horror movie tropes and has no nudity. It's simply not a horror either.

So what is this movie. I'd say it's undefined but if anything it's more of a drama. This is annoying as you don't get anything like you expect. You will see from the very dark opening scene how horrific it is. That could be a scene from a drama that sets up a backstory of trauma.

I don't think it's that good. It's worth a 4/10 because it's watchable but not great.

Nefarious (2023)

Far too wordy and drawn out for little to no payoff

[4/10 · 1 March 2024]

Far too wordy and drawn out for little to no payoff. Literally nothing happens in this film. It's two guys in a room talking endlessly about nonsense.

That works for half an hour but by an hour in it's worn really thin.

The acting isn't anything special. There is no real story.

There's no hot chicks. No action, no comedy. There's no horror. We're supposed to believe this garbage is true because they take an ending onto it.

The greater truth would be to say he was insane and therefor not fit to be executed. He shouldn't even have stood trial. Also they have the final determination about his sanity on the day of the execution. He's been on death row for 11 years and they wait till the final day to make a determination.

Nonsense film that just drags on.

The Meg (2018)

shutup meg

[7/10 · 24 February 2024]

Why do people have to mention Jaws every time they "review" a shark movie. This movie is NOTHING LIKE JAWS! There is nothing remotely similar to this movie and Jaws.

The scene where the Meg is looking at the little girl standing in the clear hallway is amazing. That is the best scene in the film. It's really scary when you notice the shark.

I have little else to say.

As far as shark movies goes, given the Syfy and Asylum treatments of shark movies this movie is a masterpiece of cinematic brilliance.

One good movie if you like these sorts of things is Lake Placid. It's about a crocodile in a lake.

Meg 2: The Trench (2023)

Too good of a movie for the subject matter.

[8/10 · 24 February 2024]

This has a budget. I'm used to The Asylum films and similar where it's mega shark vs mecha shark or some such nonsense. This wasn't stupid enough to be a great film. It was too well made. Then again it was pretty stupid in parts but overall a pretty decent film.

The underwater stuff was interesting. The villain was an imbecile I was glad to finally see die. The kid was annoying. The sharks were menacing. I think it ticks all the boxes.

Plenty of action, great CGI unless they were real sharks and they trained them really well. I found this to be entirely watchable. So many movies are truly so bad as to be unbearable viewing. This was a good movie.

Come Out Fighting (2022)

Better than expected, but worse at the same time

[5/10 · 19 February 2024]

This is a black movie almost completely. Usually I would just turn something like that off but it doesn't start out that way. They have some nice planes flying along and then a German CGI jet attacks them somehow.

There is the theme of dats bees raycist rammed down your throat. None of them were slaves, it's about time these uppity bucks ans sows got over it. Same with the Jews. 6million didn't die, it was around 1.4 million, mainly from Typhus, which is the same as other ethnic groups. Stop milking it. The Jews tried to claim 6 million died in WWI as well. There was a headline in a newspaper but it didn't catch on. The Holocaust is a fabrication.

The film is almost complete nonsense as a war film. Other reviewers have gone into that. The battles don't make sense. The way they get approval for the "mission" is ridiculous.

The film is less about war and more about race. People need to let things go. Race and religion are the worse things about this planet. Nearly all conflict comes from it and as usual the first casualty of war is truth. People don't want the truth, they want to think they know what they're being told is true and feel good believing it.

Then they make laws against free expression. Check what is censored to talk about and you'll find who the real scumbags are.

Elevator Game (2023)

Good movie with a low budget.

[7/10 · 16 February 2024]

Very watchable and enjoyable movie. I'm so tired of bad movies overrunning the world. This was finally a good little movie that works really well. Imagine if the people that made this had a Hollywood budget. OMG the things they could do. This movie was really good. I give it a 7/10 which means I'll watch it again and enjoy it a second time some day. I liked most of the characters and the acting was good for kids. The premise is good and it's a shame the whole team died because it would be nice to see the gang in something else. The idiot biatch at the end was hilarious because we know what is coming and we know that type of chic deserves it. You know the type that lives for social media and is a vapid shell of an excuse for a human.

The Tank (2023)

Horror, Mystery, Thriller. Lets assess

[3/10 · 16 February 2024]

It's far from a horror. It's far from a thriller. It's basically a mystery of some sort which evolves into a slight horror with some thriller aspects. It's just not very well made to grab your attention in any category.

If they added some comedy they might have had something a little better. It takes itself far too seriously the whole time and the characters aren't there to support the story.

It's all based on the history of this place they inherited and it's just not that interesting.

The creature should have been a bit more campy, like an 80s horror if they're going for a real rubber creature feature. It lacks that comedic element that is essential for good creature horror.

That's just what I think.

Freelance (2023)

Good but a bit long. Kind of drags on a bit. Well performed with an interesting plot.

[6/10 · 14 February 2024]

Let's face it, a totally original film can be very miss rather than hit. This is why there are basic rules and formulas to a good story. It's an interesting film in parts, you hope for interest anyway. You don't always get it. At least it's not a dumb action film. It's slightly nuanced with the way the plot goes. It has a balance of action, comedy and some mystery. Nobody would predict the story of the dictator and the goings on in his country. In that way it adds that third dimension. I didn't like the character of the dictator but he is by far the most colorful character in it. The wife is a bit of a biatch. Worth a watch.

Night of the Hunted (2023)

I watched it all but half an hour reveals how bad this movie really it.

[3/10 · 10 February 2024]

There is some dialog midway over the radio. It's quite ridiculous as this utter nutter butter accuses the lovely young lady and the greater society as going to label him. Label him a conspiracy theorist (which is an insult in it's own right) and an antivaxer and a slew of other nonsense. But you sir are a total asshole period. Because she works for a pharmaceutical company he targets her in the most random and bizarre way imaginable. By shooting into a quicky mart which she is in. He's a nutter. An utter nutter pure and simple and would have been better off turning the gun on himself at home. He achieves nothing, and ultimately has his head crushed which is very deserving.

Killers of the Flower Moon (2023)

Long movie that's takes a long time to be very long for no apparent reason.

[6/10 · 9 February 2024]

This is so long yet there is very little substance to it. Some Indians were killed in some plot to secure their oil by some bad white people. Boo hoo. There is very little emotion in the film. Everyone dies all the time. There is no action or suspense. You will need energy drinks so as you don't fall asleep. There are too many characters with little to nothing to add to the story. Yet it doesn't drag. Sure it's the longest thing you'll ever see but it's watchable at the same time. It just seems to keep on going and then it ends very abruptly. So I don't think it's well paced to take 3.5 hours getting there to have such a poor ending. There is no payoff for watching this self indulgent movie for so long. At least when Tarantino makes a long film there is always a payoff for having watched. It's a good experience that you walk away going yeah that was good. It was long but good. This is beyond long and there is no payoff.