Ningishzida999 Reviews

Titane (2021)

Awful! (But NOT In A Good Way)

[1/10 · 28 November 2021]

In a nutshell...

Titane is gross stupidity X nonsense.

Don't listen to the wannabe 'arthouse' geeks...

This movie is only entertaining if you've been in solitary confinement for 30 years.

Otherwise, it's the pits.

Swerve Titane like it is urine in your drinking water.

Survive the Night (2020)

LOL... TV Soap Opera At Best!

[4/10 · 30 May 2020]

What the hell was Bruce Willis doing in this movie?!

He must have a few debts to pay off...

Bad acting, bad screenplay, bad cimematography, cheesey storyline...

Better than Scrabble, not as good as 'Star Wars Kid' on YouTube!

Dunkirk (2017)

The Soundtrack And The Movie Are Like Chalk And Cheese! - Even 'Mumble Rap' Would Have Fit Better

[1/10 · 31 January 2020]

A disaster for a number of reasons!

Such a disappointment, especially from Christoper Nolan...

Firstly, the biggest grave, monumental mistake Warner Bros or Christoper Nolan made with this movie is, to 'try' and certify the horrors of war into a 12 certificate!

How can anyone portray the TRUE terror and trepidation of war with a 12 certificate?!

You simply cannot.

And here wherein lies the most significant problem with this movie!

As one reviewer aptly put it, this is, 'Dunkirk, The Disney Version'.

It is such a shame it's so tame...

The subsequent monumental mistake, as mention above in the title, is the soundtrack.

It does not fit the movie at all!

So for that reason, there is no feeling or suspense that's meant to make you feel gripped as if you were right there on the sands of Dunkirk.

Usually, the soundtrack and the movie are designed to fall in love with one another ('Blade Runner' springs to mind), thus, forming an epic film.

This does not happen with 'Dunkirk' whatsoever, which leaves the movie bland, lifeless, and even boring. I found myself reaching for my phone, rather than being on the edge of my seat.

Changeland (2019)

Depressingly, Depressing, Plotless, Snooze Fest! - Only Watch If Suffering From Insomnia

[1/10 · 12 June 2019]

SHOCKINGLY TERRIBLE!

I kept waiting, and waiting for something to actually happen; waiting for some sort of storyline to kick in, but it never does.......

It's painfully boring with absolutely no return whatsoever!

It's sooooo depressing it makes suicide seem like good fun...

The ONLY good thing in this movie is Thailand!!!

Elizabeth Harvest (2018)

Ignore The Low Scores On Here; They're From Single-Celled Fast And Furious Degenerates - This Is A Great Movie!

[10/10 · 6 September 2018]

Elizabeth Harvest is a well acted, well thought out, intelligent, twisty indie thriller movie that will keep you thinking; if not a little puzzled till the end.

Well worth a watch if you enjoy a thought provoking movie; however, if your tipple is more inclined to film with tragic storylines and terrible acting about idiots driving cars fast and presuming it's cool. Then this movie isn't for you!

The Most Unknown (2018)

If You're Having Trouble Sleeping - Watch This! It Could Send A Glass Eye To Sleep

[1/10 · 1 September 2018]

I find science incredibly interesting...

However, this documentary is beyond boring!

It is so poorly explained; my dog could have done a better job.

I was continually guessing throughout the documentary on what the whole point was.

Only finally when the documentary finished (thank god) did I understand the point of it, which was - NOTHING!

It was utterly meaningless.

The point of the 9 scientists from all around the world meeting up, was for nothing! - There was no overall outcome whatsoever... It was a completely pointless achievement!?

They talked about their particular profession to the former scientist in the documentary, and apart from that... NOTHING happened, let alone be discovered!

Honestly, it was a waste of life... Do yourself a favour, don't bother!

Listening to paint dry will entertain you infinitely more...

Zzzzz...

Traffik (2018)

Don't Believe The Rating! The Is A CHEEEESE Festival...

[4/10 · 4 August 2018]

In all honesty, this movies start's with the makings of a half decent thriller.

Until, the storyline withered rapidly into an orgy of cheese-tardation, leaving this film in the realm of B-movies, if not TV movies.

For example: Brea (the main character) get's into a car to try and get away from her pursuer, she puts the key in the ignition of the vehicle, and guess what happens? - The car doesn't start!

I mean, seriously, either there's a HELL of a lot of cars in America that people have parked in their driveway that don't start, or, it's lazy, lazy, LAZY scriptwriting... It's so pathetic!

That's basically how the storyline progresses; It gets cheesier, cheesier, and even cheeeesier... Until it's lost any glimmer of hope!

Bottomline, the storyline is incredibly weak and juvenile spoiling any slight trace of potential it had in the first place!

If you're looking for a no-nonsense, adult, gripping thriller movie, then this isn't for you! However, check out the British film 'Calibre', as that movie will fit your requirements.

Storm Warning (2007)

Seriously don't waste your life!

[1/10 · 15 April 2016]

Dimensions 'Extreme'... Pffffff... More like Dimensions Pussy Whipped!

5.9 isn't a good score on here anyhow, but that's grossly overrated for this terrible movie!!

You can't even call it a B Movie, even Z would be an overstatement......

The story sucks, the acting sucks, the gore scene are absurdly disappointing for a so- called 'extreme' movie, & nothing happens till 1 hour in when the movie is only 1 hour & 20 minutes long in the first place!

The only win about this movie is the French chick is hot...

Seriously, don't listen to the positive reviews on here, I am myself an avid horror fan too, & I also love & appreciate B movies, but this flick is just awful... THE END!

Montauk Chronicles (2015)

For Anyone Who's Done Any Real Research Into The Montauk Project This Won't Cut The Mustard!

[2/10 · 9 February 2015]

Not worth the 3 years wait for this documentary!

It should have been a LOT better, the 2-star rating was for Al & Preston, certainly NOT for Stewart Swerdlow. As after doing a bit of research on him, it's more likely than not that he's a conman/dis-informer/mind control slave PROGRAMMER!

Google - "Stewart Swerdlow Scam" or "Stewart Swerdlow Conman"

I've researched The Montauk Project a lot, I've watched possibly every YouTube video related to the subject, I've listened to all Michael Houtzager's audio interviews with Al Bielek, Preston Nichols, Duncan Cameron, Stewart Swerdlow & Larry James, & I've read all of Peter Moon's & Preston's books, & Stewart Swerdlow's too...

This documentary doesn't go deep enough into the rabbit hole, & I imagine for a first timer it would be difficult to grasp the full picture. As they should have gone into more details about the project & the events, for example...

The Nazi's, & the Nazi gold connection is never fully explained & mentioned, Duncan Cameron is only discussed very briefly, the creature released at the end of the Montauk Project is only touched upon, & the pictures of it are never shown! Al & Duncan going to Mars & time travel is only mentioned VERY briefly too...!?!?! The connection to The Philadelphia Project is never mentioned either... There is so much missed out; it really can't be taken seriously for anyone researching the subject!!!

The movie part was grossly exaggerated too, there's an alien scene, whereby a "grey alien" has fangs with saliva dribbling down from them as if it's a vampire or something...

I mean com'on...!?!?

It's just insulting people's intelligence, & disgracing Al & Preston's accounts.

Sounds petty, but it's attention to detail, as this is a massively important & horrifying story that needs to be taken seriously, & retold as accurately as possible for the survivor's sake, & the unfortunate people who didn't make it. Especially when the movie took so long to make...........

In short, it was a big disappointment; it could have been done a LOT better, & does no credit whatsoever to the original story... It's nothing but a flashy attempt at a documentary trying to win an award, & make a few dollars off the back of Al & Preston's story at the same time...

Don't waste your life... Save your money! Or buy beer instead........

Melancholie der Engel (2009)

No waaay... As bad as people make out... 'A Serbian Film' Is still the daddy of sick movies!

[1/10 · 8 July 2013]

The horror status this movie has got is pretty high... Possibly, seen as a must for die hard horror fans...

I'll start off on a high, Melancholie der Engel has great camera work, & to a large extent, the soundtrack is OK...

However... Its just waaay too long...

There is some great sick scenes in there, but it just gets boring in between, & the dialogue is terrible... Which for me is the biggest bummer, as regarding the storyline, there is just nothing to grab onto, at all, its basically just random scenes of emptiness...

I'm guessing this movie got rated so sick for the animal cruelty in it, which of course is bad... However compare that to the extreme scenes of paedophilia in 'A Serbian Film'... Well... I know which were more disturbing for me...

At the end of the day, this movie is only worth a watch to see how it compares to the rest of the so-called sick movies...

Sightseers (2012)

Please Read This Before Buying or Watching The DVD!

[1/10 · 28 March 2013]

HONESTLY... Its AWFUL!

Its about as funny as a kick in the balls!!! & for it to get 7 stars on here is just MADNESS... It doesn't deserve 1!!!!

The biggest joke is the reviews from the film critics...!?!?!?!?

They all must have been on drugs while watching & reviewing this movie, if not they all deserve the sack, because its about as entertaining as watching paint dry... & to say its a comedy, is just INSANE - A LIE!

I urge you to read some of the previous negative reviews of this movie on here from people who actually watched it at the cinema... They all state that people walked out because it was soo bad!

*Bottom line!*

NOT FUNNY... Dull & Life Wasting!!!

How I Ended This Summer (2010)

Zzzzzzz... UTTERLY POINTLESS!!!

[1/10 · 22 January 2013]

Yawn...

Well what can I say...

This movie is just so slow it could send a glass eye to sleep! Apart from that its just utterly pointless...

I mean why didn't the young guy just tell him...!?!?! I know he's meant to be waiting for the right moment & all that jazz... However that just does NOT come across in the movie at all!!!

& finally when the young guy tells him that his family is dead... The other guy turns around & wants to kill the young guy... LOL!

Then after a lot of running about... (The exciting part)

*Snigger*

They are best buddies again...!?!?

Like I said a the start of this review the movie is utterly pointless!!!

Well acted & good camera work... But the storyline BLOWS!

Fargo (1996)

Utter Tripe!

[1/10 · 20 January 2010]

I honest can't believe its 118 in the IMDb top 250!...

Its a meaningless, pointless movie!!... I was expecting it to be amazing but its not!!!

For it to win 2 Oscars & another 52 wins & 30 nominations, is just a joke!

Honestly its utter tripe!!!!... It could send a glass eye to sleep!...

Its soo annoying how the characters keep saying "Yah"

There Americans not Germans!!!

Give it a miss, its rubbish!!!

There honestly is nothing more to be said about this movie!