Rick_Swift Reviews

The Flying Fish (2019)

How belief shapes our understanding of the universe

[8/10 · 5 September 2019]

I am not an art critic, so I apologize to the creator, Murat Sayginer if this review doesn't completely capture the stupendous brilliance of his short film.

I am typically drawn to story, but with The Flying Fish there is no real story. It's a kind of story told through symbology and leaves much open to the viewer. And it would appear that the end result is a combination of several other short films available on Sayginer's site, interwoven through one message about the human condition. Namely, what it means to be human.

Oddly enough, this was a very similar theme in Gyrus. Maybe all movies are in their own way an interpretation of the human condition, but that might be a bit trite.

The Flying Fish is about the creation of man and how our creator made the universe for us to enjoy. But as we grow more knowledgeable and seek to understand the mysteries of the universe, we are transformed and sent out of Eden. And as we are transformed, our connection to pure energy, or the source, decays.

There's a lot of speculative interpretation throughout the viewing experience. And I say that it is indeed an experience. It's captivating and beautiful to watch, to absorb the aesthetic digital wonder that Sayginer presents.

The thing with art is, it is incredibly subjective. Much like comedy, actually. I have said before that with comedy, you either like it or you don't, that you laugh at a joke, or you don't. That's the way art is as well. Not everyone will "get it." But, what is unique about art is how the interpretation can reveal something about the creator and the viewer.

So, here's my interpretation of the visual, digital art. But, again, you may see something completely different than I did.

The story, as it unfolds appears to be a kind of evolutionary journey starting with creation and the garden of Eden and ends up in a virtual Myth of Er.

If you aren't familiar with that Myth, it goes back to Plato. The belief was that we create our own lives on the other side; we pick our avatars and our personalities, our families and even the choices we will make.

But, there are actually several stories being told in The Flying Fish, it's a bit non-linear due to its structure, but that doesn't really detract from the overall concept of form. The message is still there, and in fact, it is present in each iteration, each chapter of the film as a whole.

I enjoyed it quite a bit, for the stark contrasts throughout, as themes of good and evil, the balance of nature, the path to enlightenment and even a nod to the digital, intelligent design concept of creation which essentially breaks the universe down to a binary code.

In my real job I work with data and the analysis of data, and I have become more inclined to the belief that we are just ones and zeroes, just strands of code. Not unlike the Matrix or even Sim-City, we are created by some grand coder that beautifully orchestrates our life . . . and yes, our deaths.

And while The Flying Fish does dance with enlightenment, still missing from every theory I have ever given a thought to with my mind's eye is the why. Why were created? Perhaps watching Sayginer's film will inspire other thoughts in you.

Make sure you give this one a watch if you were ever a fan of MTV's Liquid Television back in the day or have speculated on the nature of creation for more than a few minutes. This is a thinking man's movie. I recommend it to anyone who wants to think.

Red Tails (2012)

The Red Tailed Angels of the sky.

[4/10 · 20 January 2012]

Swift shot: Despite a tacky soundtrack and a high-school AV club font for the credits which looked like it was ripped right from Windows Paint, this film delivered some solid memories. Thanks to the previews, I was expecting it to have modern music for the sound, ala "A Knight's Tale" and "Marie Antoinette", but they went with a more traditional score. I wish they had opted for the modern style, because the music never worked for me . . . granted I was focused on it the whole time. I was also expecting a lot from the folks at Lucas' Industrial Lights & Magic (ILM), and they didn't let me down. The gritty attention to detail paid to the P40 Warhawks with rusty bolts and hinges in contrast to sexy, mint P51 Mustangs was noteworthy. The actors were a bit rough around the edges, but as the film progressed, I found myself more drawn to the characters and less focused on the film's elements.

Set in 1944, Italy, we follow the "historical" adventures of the 332nd Fighter Group, comprised entirely of "..egro" pilots and crewmen. In 1944, the brass has decided to grant black soldiers the chance to prove they can stand toe-to-toe with any other Americans in the war effort. One bold initiative creates the 332nd and, at least on paper, affords the men that chance. Met with nothing but resistance along their path to become pilots, the men form a strong bond – probably more significant than most other soldiers who essentially take for granted that they have at least earned a grudging respect from their comrades. Not so for the 332nd, everything they are doing is literally being scrutinized by everyone in the world, not just the military, and not just the Americans. They are under a lot of pressure to be beyond good . . . thing is, the brass isn't exactly giving them any real missions worth a damn.

And that is where we come in, after a routine mission of "killing traffic" (one of my favorite lines) their Colonel, Bullard (Terrence Howard) is called to Washington D.C. following some harsh words from the press that the ...egro pilot experiment is a failure. One particularly nasty Colonel, Mortamus (Bryan "Breaking Bad" Cranston) has leaked the false story in the hopes of putting an end to them once and for all. Now the pressure is higher than ever for them to show they can take on dangerous missions, and they are granted an air cover mission for an Allied Landing . . . Operation Shingle. Not only do they accomplish their mission, they log some significant kills. Speaking of killing . . . this film is incredibly violent, lots of strafing runs, lots of explosions and people meeting their mortal end. For the most part these people were Nazis, so no one really minded, but in all wars even the good guys die, and Red Tails does show a few of the good guys eating dirt too. In fact, with four words, the entire tone of the film shifts in one dramatic dogfight.

I read on IMDb that George Lucas started this project in 1988 and couldn't get any significant funding, because "an all black cast isn't going to sell tickets". Interestingly, he foot most of the bill for this film himself, and stylized the leads after historical figures from black civil rights lore, Easy, or Capt Marty Julian (Nate Parker) was inspired on Martin Luther King, Jr. Lightning, or Capt Joe Little (David Oyelowo) was inspired on Malcolm X, and considering the screenplay was co-written by the controversial "Boondocks" writer Aaron McGruder, it makes perfect sense. His characters are always bigger than life and inspired on great men and women.

The other characters make up a fairly motley crew of pilots and mechanics which reminded me a lot of the Black Sheep Squadron that I used to watch with my dad, with clever call-signs and a bit of arrogance and flair. There really were too many to list here, but my favorite supporting actor would have to be Ne-Yo as Smokey who delivers the most clever line of the film.

I wanted to like this one a little bit more, and it is a freaking crying shame that in 2012 no one stepped up to the plate and assisted George Lucas to the point where this film was on an epic scale, I wasn't overly impressed with Terrence Blanchard when I am spoiled with John Williams doing Lucas' other scores and some other elements felt tacked on at the end as well. In once scene, Lightning takes on an entire Officer's Club filled with white pilots, and he is in the stockade the next scene without a scratch on him, not so much as a hangnail. That might fly in an amateur's reel, but not when I see Lucas' name attached. Ultimately, this film was not all that it could, and should, have been. The aerial combat sequences were tight and magnificent, and I really have not one bad thing to say about them. The story was interesting, but I felt that a lot of the film was rushed in order to get as much "history" into the final edits and I think some things should have been cut out altogether.

Perhaps this film will serve to do what it was ultimately intended to do, get Americans, black, white, red, yellow, blue, purple, green, who cares, to care about the sacrifices of these 'colored' men who not only had to fight a war, they had to fight to earn even a modicum of respect in their "free" country. We all have battles, and we have all had to deal with prejudices, but I challenge anyone to say these aviators weren't some of the most mentally tough men to ever wear wings. The Red Tailed Angels of the sky.

Captain America: The First Avenger (2011)

Captain America is good, but which character is really aligned with Evans?

[21 July 2011]

Swift shot: Captain America is one bad-ass hero. He defines courage and commitment; quite literally he has inspired thousands of people, men and women, to don their nation's uniform as soldiers – and Chris Evans doesn't hump the bunk. He was Human Torch in Fantastic Four as well, and that character was a real punk. With Steve Rogers, though, Evans brings a more serious presence to the classic shield-wielding super soldier. As his creator reminds him, a strong man loses respect for strength and power, but a weak man will never take it for granted. Still, none of that matters a hill of beans, because Tommy Lee Jones as the ever charming, Colonel Phillips, steals the whole film!

Steve Rogers is a courageous man in an ill-matched frame. He is never afraid to stick up for the little guy, and his passion for his nation is unequaled. When war is upon his people, he wants desperately to join the military ranks. But, try as he might, he always comes back a 4F, reject/defect. He has tried lying several times, but the astute military doctors always give him the same diagnosis, and merely the asthma alone keeps him disqualified after countless attempts. On his last attempt though, he earns the attention of a German Doctor Erskine (Stanley Tucci) who selects him for a top-secret, super soldier squad. From there, his life is never the same – his path as the First Avenger is chiseled in stone.

Captain America was always one of my favorite heroes as a kid, because he symbolized hope and the promise that regardless of size or stature, the size of your character can lead to great things if you commit yourself. Really, that is what Cap is all about, and that is why he hates bullies – they have strength but use it for evil. They are spoiled. Steve does quite a bit of bully bashing in this film, but his journey to become Captain America doesn't necessarily play out as he envisioned.

Meanwhile, across the Atlantic, the Nazi super scientist group, Hydra (kill one head, two more grow back) led by the incredibly power- hungry Johan Schmidt (Hugo Weaving) is searching for what most assume to be legend, but he and Hydra deem fact. Finally capturing the super-natural element, Hydra is nearly unstoppable on the battlefield.

And, while this movie may be torn from a comic book, it is, in earnest a war film, set almost entirely in the 1940s as war ravages the world and madmen are commonplace. Still, that is an adequate setting for a comic book, now that I think about it. Because Rogers is a Captain, he needs a commander, enter Colonel Chester Phillips (Tommy Lee Jones) who had high hopes for the super soldier serum, but Hydra quickly shatters his dreams and he becomes more grounded and pragmatic as the film proceeds. Still, Phillips' team is staffed by the lethally accurate Agent Carter (Hayley Atwell), who is as gorgeous as she is deadly with a pistol, and Howard Stark (Dominic Cooper), yes, THAT Howard Stark, the head of Stark Industries. And where would any self-respecting super-hero be without his trusty side-kick, for Cap, the omnipresent Bucky (Sebastian Stan) who is there for Steve regardless of risk.

Some of the things that really worked in this film, the Gothic stylized Hydra sequences, where the action really feels set in the forties against somewhat modern technology courtesy of Hydra and Stark conversely. The story was a bit hokey in places, but for the most part can be forgiven for simply trying to stay true red, white and blue to Cap's origins. Remember, this is an origin film, and they can be difficult to keep flowing. The costumes and the 3D effects with the shield were pretty smashing, if you'll excuse the pun . . . one guy to my left actually flinched when Cap tossed his shield seemingly at the audience through a clever bounce off a troop-carrier to dispatch a Hydra agent.

There is plenty of action in Captain America, but there is also a lot of cheese – even scenes that were supposed to be 'dramatic' captured a few unintended laughs from the audience, like during the Hydra salute scenes, each time they drew a moan and a snort-giggle. But, while those laughs were unintended, EVERY line Tommy Lee Jones delivered got a huge reaction from the audience, and I would see this film again just to experience them with new friends at my side. Finally, the Howling Commandos make their first appearance, much to the delight of stalwart Cap fans – and they blow up a lot sh-t and cause a huge ruckus.

What I didn't like about Captain America was, sadly, Chris Evans was believable, and he passed, but I never got a lump in my throat where I felt he had become Captain America, where I really felt for him. It was more like, I knew I was watching a film and being entertained the entire time – still, he was Human Torch already, so maybe that destroyed the immersion factor that so many Role Players seek when casting their two ten-sided dice and comparing FASERIP. Like, to me, Hugh Jackman IS Wolverine, period. I can't say the same for Evans. Also, Red Skull was never developed to any significant degree, he was well portrayed by Weaving, who simply loves wearing false faces it seems.

But, if you just love The Avengers, and especially if you love the Captain America character, this is one for you to screen – there is a lot of big action, grandiose special effects and while I saw this in 3D, there were really only three sequences worthy of 3D and almost so self-serving it becomes detracting.

Super 8 (2011)

Simply an AMAZING STORY!

[10/10 · 9 June 2011]

Swift shot: If you see this one in theaters, count yourself enlightened, if you wait to rent or own Blu Ray, consider yourself miserable. Because, trust me, if you wait til you are home to see this for the first time, unless you are exceptionally wealthy and have a veritable theater sized screen at home – - – you are going to be kicking yourself forever! Occasionally, every few decades or so, a film comes along that just fires on all cylinders and resonates with something inside you that hasn't been active since you were a kid. Super 8 manages to do just that, stir up imaginations I once thought completely dormant – where the critical, cynical adult in me keeps the child bolted up in a dungeon called "the impossible". I want to thank EVERYONE who made this film a reality, and I wonder if Paramount knows just how fortunate they are to have some of the best film-makers to ever hold that title on their label? Set in 1979 in a steel town in Ohio, Super 8 essentially is a story about a group of friends, over the summer, dealing with a tragedy that one of them endures at the onset of the film. It has the feel of a Stand By Me script, though devoid of any narration or device that tells the story in the present. This film, again, is just an Amazing Story with a supernatural, monster-thriller, or sci-fi element tossed in to keep the characters constantly malleable and interesting.

With great tragedy comes the need for great distraction, and Writer/Director J. J. Abrams gets this, and displays this, quite efficiently. Rather than let their friend, Joe (Joel Courtney) dwell on his personal loss, his gang of misfits, led by Charles (Riley Griffiths) – who thinks he is the next Hitchcock or Romero – comes up with a perfect distraction . . . a zombie film. At first some of the others think it a bit tacky to involve a kid who just lost someone close to be shooting a zombie flick, but they figure it might help him take his mind off of the loss as well. Not to mention, the girl who everyone is afraid to talk to, Alice Dainard (Elle Fanning) has agreed to be in the film as zombie hunting detective, Martin's (Gabriel Basso) wife.

It all starts off innocently enough, Alice steals her dad's car, without a license (rebels that they are) to drive them to the shoot, EXTERIOR: late at night, a train station, now closed. They run through lines, Charles delights in directing his friends, and he tries to get the most out of what he's working with. His friends are a great team, considering they are in middle-school, and they manage a level of professionalism that exceeds their years. Then, something happens, a crash, about an EIGHT on the butt-pucker scale (patent pending), which really sets the sci-fi or supernatural elements into locomotion.

What happens next is all too easy to spoil, suffice it to say, something is not quite right in the steel town of Lilian, Ohio circa 1979. The Air Force, helmed by Colonel Nelec (Noah Emmerich) is somehow involved, Joe's dad, Jackson, the deputy sheriff, played by the exceptionally talented TV-actor (Kyle Chandler) is suddenly put in charge and the misfits find themselves caught in the middle of everything but are still hell-bent on finishing their film to submit to the Cleveland Film Festival . . . ah great aspirations must start somewhere, but Cleveland? Comedy and tragedy is spliced into the story masterfully in short little bursts with character dialog, incredible action sequences and excellent acting. And, someone check me if I am wrong, but did they cryo freeze the blond-haired brat from the 70′s version of The Bad News Bears and place braces on him to hide his identity? Because, that kid Cary (Ryan Lee) in Super 8 is his clone! Super 8 is a high-tech drama with a childish heart that reminds you what it was like to build models, pine for the prettiest girl in school, and to never stop fighting for those you love. It is a film about loss, grief, struggling to cope and acceptance, all with a "twist" just to make things more interesting . . . or rather, AMAZING!

Quarterlifers (2011)

Sometimes the freedom to make choices traps the best of us

[6 March 2011]

Swift shot: First, I screened this at a local Art and Culture Center, and I wasn't sure what to expect, I had no studio notes, no actor's bios, nor synopsis, I was completely void of any prior knowledge of this film. I must say, I wasn't expecting to be so moved by an independent film, shot locally with almost no budget – a REAL independent film, not something punched out by Hollywood from one of their cookie-cutter "indie" studios – this was the real deal, local guys and gals putting in late hours for no guarantee of a payoff and no comfy studio contract to keep them warm at night. Yet, Quarterlifers is on par with a big-budget studio presentation, save for a few minor places for improvement which can be easily over-looked.

The characters grow on you, you identify with them or perhaps you know a few of them. Either way, they were genuine and you either loved them or loathed them, I didn't find myself apathetic to their circumstances once. That credit goes to the whole crew, not just Writer/Director/Actor Adam Fortner who served as the almighty substance that kept everything together – without his loyal team, really delivering solid work, the whole thing would have come across as some kind of amateurish flop. This was no flop! Quarterlifers is on the surface a story of four mid-twenties friends (thus the title - for the cheap seats), who are each trying to figure out that simple, yet terrifying, question – what the hell do I want to do with my life? The primary focus is on Riggs (Adam Fortner) who majored in Criminal Psychology, because hey, aren't we all gonna be hunting serial killers for the FBI? But reality soon sets in after college and he finds himself a skilled speech writer for a campaign team trying to get Matthew Gibson (Bobby Dodge) elected to Congress.

Riggs is flanked by his cast of loyalists: the stooge, Jason, played marvelously by Lincoln Potwin whose character provides both serious and incredibly funny moments throughout. At one point I was thinking, hey, what about Jason, and voila, Fortner read my mind. Closely following Jason in my personal preference pecking order was Ryan (Roy Lynam) who actually does what a lot of us want to do after college but are too "responsible" – he buys his local billiards bar and tries to run it on a shoe-string budget, he was a character I certainly identified with for that reason alone. Closing out the lead male cast is the more complex character of the three supporting roles, Derek, who (I am not spoiling anything here) you will find yourself hating in the beginning. But, he just may surprise you. Derek was played very effectively by Andrew Roth, who I was not surprised to learn has 30 notch-marks already in the industry.

Riggs is going through a soul-searching time as the film takes off, having just broken up with his steady girlfriend, who most of his family "really liked" – he is also trying to get Gibson elected while working for a stern, yet respectful task-master in campaign manager Michael whose casting I thought was superb, because Richard Haylor looked tough as nails but even in the short amount of screen-time, Fortner gives him the chance to really develop as a character through his dialog. I really hope to see Haylor in more films, and I am sure Fortner would re-cast him, because the performance he gave was just genuine and incredibly believable.

Finally, Riggs' "Dad", the sage, wise patriarch of the entire band of merry men was portrayed by Rick Montgomery, Jr. What I liked about "Dad" was how he seemed equally comfortable at work as he was at home giving his son one of those amazing talks that only great dads really can deliver, all while failing miserably on XBox.

Notice a pattern yet? Right, the review is a bit male-centric, well, the film was also heavy on the testosterone, but Fortner managed to give depth to the female characters while they might not have had much screen time to play with. Riggs' sister, Emily (Keri Maletto) provides a quirky reality to balance Riggs overtly serious tones, yet also serves as a true loving sister and has a pivotal scene later in the film that I really felt.

Jason's girlfriend Angela (Carolina Insua) keeps your attention in every scene, the physicality of her performance was subtle yet incredibly effective, as she harasses Jason to seek more at work and from life. Jennifer (Millie Capellan) performs admirably as Ryan's wife who wants him to succeed but not at the cost of their marriage. Riggs' ex-girlfriend Claire (Miranda Khan) helps put things in Riggs' life into focus as life delivers him a harsh scratch. Finally, there is Riggs' mother, played by Marilyn Carlisle who is always there for her children with a hot meal, even at 25, and a shoulder for whenever it is needed.

What happens in this film? Is it all just a bunch of fluff and no circumstance with interesting characters who don't face any real challenges other than the clichéd why am I here, what should I be doing, etc etc etc? I am not going to tell you what happens in the film, I will say this, the story will get to you, it is about life, the choices we make, the actions that define us, the words we choose and how they cast us in a mold to the world whether they be true or facades that we show to the world. It is a film about friendship, loyalty, the truth about what defines love and loneliness. It is a lighthearted punch in the gut – much like life!

2012 (I) (2009)

What are you going to do on Day 27?

[8/10 · 13 November 2009]

Swift shot: Dynamic special effects dominate a terrible landscape of destruction and demise. The characters gradually become compelling and the story is interesting; what you won't find shoved down your throat is the conspiracy theorists rantings, it is addressed but not overdone - well played by the director. There have been enough shows on Discovery and the History Channel postulating what might happen – this film shows you what WILL happen! OK, perhaps nothing will happen, but either way, this film can stand on its own as an impressive natural disaster thriller.

What do you grab as the embers burn around you? What is the thing that defines you, what are you willing to let go of when the final bell tolls? These are questions that will haunt you throughout Roland Emmerich's latest natural disaster epic, 2012.

I am assuming most know the Mayans predicted the end of all time to be December 21, 2012. So, how will it all end, what will be the final stroke that does in humanity? I won't ruin it for you by giving it away (as there is a slight twist), but I will give you a hint. . . the human plan for survival is nothing incredibly novel.

The storyline centers around a broken family, struggling to come to terms with roles and identities undefined. John Cusack plays Jackson Curtis, a small-time, albeit published author of a novel that swallowed his marriage. He of course is broke and trying to prove to his now somewhat estranged children that he is still their father. He wants to hate the new beau in his ex-wife's life – and I wanted to hate him too – but he serves his purpose and is an honorable character.

On one of his "super dad" trips to Yellowstone Park, they happen across a drained out lake as some whackadoo (Woody Harrelson) observes his family get detained by the US Geological Department. Of course they are advised to vacate the area but are never told why. Jackson discovers the nut-job broadcasts a radio program from a trailer in Yellowstone – and at first he blows him off as another conspiracist freak. But, what do you do when the freaks with the cardboard signs are right? In a race to escape the end of the world, Jackson manages to gather his family, including his replacement, to a beyond top-secret escape plan set out of China. In a twisted Bondesque setting, a secret international society will stop at nothing to protect the secret. Flanked by sub-plots galore, reminiscent of Independence Day, the characters come across as a tad melodramatic – but not to the detriment of the audience.

What makes this film so interesting is speculating your own role in your family, your country, your very existence – when the stakes are nothing short of the entire Earth, what would you do to survive? Would you sacrifice yourself so that others may live? What values truly make us humans? These questions are answered throughout the film. I was incredibly entertained and compelled to follow the life-paths of these characters well after the final credits faded out.

If you wait to rent this one, shame on you, the special-effects alone demand you enjoy this in theaters. I was amazed at how interactive the crowd was throughout this film. I remember when I saw Independence Day, surrounded by fellow jarheads – and how we cheered as the Marine saved the day.

This film lets everyone play Marine! See, worth isn't measured by wealth or what color your nation's flag is or what your medals say about you . . . it is measured by your actions regardless of personal danger. Anyone can be a hero, it just takes a compassionate heart and the courage to stand up.

www.iratefilms.com

Towelhead (2007)

Towelhead delivers controversy with style...

[8/10 · 2 November 2009]

Swift shot: This movie was NOTHING that I was expecting. I rented it because of the title and because I like controversial themes - challenging the mind is never a bad thing. Brilliant acting throughout the film and incredibly disturbing subject matter! Be warned, this one is aptly labeled controversial - it isn't just a marketing stunt! Only the thick-skinned should view this one, seriously! While the title implies this movie is about racism, it is really only the base of the film and merely used to bait the viewer. While I normally detract "points" for that sort of manipulation, it was brilliantly pulled off in Towelhead. From scene one, you'll learn not to be so quick to judge the film, anymore than you should judge the characters.

With a Dickensian style to the story, a poor little blossoming outsider is kicked out of the house to go live with her megalomaniac father, who is really focused on everything else but his daughter – until his daughter disappoints him by choosing a member of the opposite race to date. Never owning up to their racism, nor hypocrisy, both parents, Rifat (Peter Macdissi) and Gail (Maria Bello) need to be dragged and quartered for failing to provide emotional support for their daughter. I guess my disgust for these characters is a credit to the actors, and I couldn't find one actor (not even some of the kids) that gave mediocre performances.

Alan Ball is rapidly becoming my favorite director, his style appeals to me in a way I can't share in writing. While he mostly writes for the small idiot box, Ball certainly knows how to get results from everyone on set, surrounding himself with talented, passionate (bonafide) artists. I think his real success must come from some stellar casting work, I don't feel like any of the roles were forced and while the subject matter could end careers, the actors always seem comfortable committing their sins for Ball – almost like he put poppers in their PEZ! (That was for you, Ck) Summer Bishil steals every scene, driving home the point that Jasira Maroun is just a little girl dealing with some incredibly mature issues. Her child-like commitment to Jasira was as imaginative as it was disturbing. Complementing her performance were Aaron Eckhart and Peter Macdissi who each took turns shaping her world-views in their own twisted ways.

Fantasy sequences serve to titillate and disturb, and fantasy sometimes falls short of the real thing – sometimes fantasy ruins reality too. I'll let you be the judge with that one. Watching this film will leave a mark on your mind, might even make you wish you had never watched it in the first place – but, again, failure to confront the uncomfortable leads to failing to understand the uncomfortable.

For my part, I learned both lessons about pre-judging films (twice this month now) based on their titles and about the dramatic impact apathy can have on a child. Towelhead has another title, but it is really quite lame and cowardly, "Nothing is Private" but they could have gone with this title, "How NOT to raise a child!" which would have been spot-on.

Little side-note, I did some quick research on Ball, apparently his sister literally died "all over" him when he was 13, on her 22nd birthday – they were in a terrible accident. So, death and loss shaped him, artistically, at a very young age. While Towelhead doesn't really focus on death, the death of innocence is carried throughout – no doubt, a testament to Ball's own loss of innocence.

My only real criticism of the film would be the pacing in some places made no sense, and sometimes the disjointed weaving of the story detracted from the pulse overall. A few of the characters bored me, but again, real life is hardly all Megan Fox running around with robots, right Action Flick Chick? I will continue to follow anything Ball touches, the guy has definitely gotten my attention for the long-haul now.

www.iratefilms.com

Zombieland (2009)

If you are out of shape in Zland, start adding some Mrs. Dash to your ass, because you are about to be zombie chow.

[2 October 2009]

Swift shot: Zombie flicks and me usually don't get along well, when they are seriously driven, but Zland doesn't take itself too seriously – it is just a sweet ass ride, one that you will want to experience again and again. You'll want to bring different people with you to gauge their reactions, see if they are savvy enough to catch on and find out if they could keep up with the rules of Zombieland. And I know this film is layered, so seeing it two or three times couldn't hurt.

Right out of the gate this friggin movie has you by the nuts! From the very beginning, you are introduced to chaos and mayhem. But, fret not, even the meek can survive in Zombieland, if you remember to follow the rules. Rule #1 – Cardio! If you are out of shape in Zland, start adding some Mrs. Dash to your ass, because you are about to be zombie chow.

Zombieland has many rules, and if you pay attention you will see them strewn about this amazing film, using that interactive caption technique (you've seen it on a cheesy VW commercial). The rules will be forced down your throat over and over again, but each time is more clever and creative than the next. If you are like me, some douche-bag will be sitting behind you reading them out loud and guffawing as the butter and snot drip out of his mouth, because he is a douche-bag – so it stands to reason that the concession people hocked a luggie in his popcorn. And if they didn't, they should be fired . . . immediately.

Just when you think you have this film completely figured out, director Ruben Fleischer throws in a great surprise which I am sworn to keep quiet about on pain of death. Let's just say, you won't see it coming, and while there are quite a few predictable moments in Zombieland, the few times things aren't always as they seem will challenge your experience.

Apparently Mike Cera was not in this film, and I really gotta stop getting actors mixed up, it was Jesse (Columbus) Eisenberg, who was in Adventureland earlier this year. I think I can figure out which one he had more fun shooting – at least from what I saw on screen anyway. Woody (Tallahassee) Harrelson found his niche with his redneck rendition of Rambo meets Rowdy Roddy Piper. Tallahassee relishes squashing zombies, thrives at it, and teaches Columbus some new rules . . . and when to break those rules.

Delicious, delectable, devious Emma Stone plays Wichita, who is trying to navigate with her own set of rules as she desperately tries to lead her sister, Little Rock (Abigail Breslin) out of Zombieland and to the Pacific Playland theme park – or, Disneyland to us r-tards. I think the set they used was straight outta Adventureland or wherever they shot National Lampoon's Vacation . . . Wally World. In fact, it would have been somewhat apropos to use Wally World.

You will enjoy Zombieland; as my dad used to say, "it's an E-Ticket ride!" My review can't do justice to the experience that is Zombieland – go see it, then run right back out, grab some non-luggie popcorn, and see it again! And if you dare wait to "rent" this, please mail your testicles to some Swiss lab, because you got a rotten pair!!

District 9 (2009)

Aliens - go home

[6/10 · 14 August 2009]

Storyline An extraterrestrial race is forced to live within "the projects" (Yo, homie !) located in central Africa, striving to meek out their existence in hopes of returning to their home planet which they've been away from now for oh,…twenty f'n years! A spirited government agent who is exposed to their unique biotechnology may be their final hope or pull their air all together. Think: "Going Postal" meets "E.T." . . . on crack.

The Cast and Crew Hats off to Neill Blomkamp for not writing and directing what seems to be his first flick, but convincing folks to lend him tens of millions to make a sci-fi movie which appears written during some serious whippit sessions; which I'm sure he thought, "it'll knock those tasty Reese's Pieces right outta cute little E.T.'s, glow-stick hand" – Dumb, dumb, ta'daa… Oh, so sorry Neill, with two "ls" for good measure, but you've just lost in…Let's Make a Movie! But turn that frown upside down you freaky little Spielberg leg-humper 'cause we're sending you away with: A YEAR'S SUPPLY OF CO2 CANISTERS ….to help with your next train wreck.

I wasn't crazy about any of the cast members. A couple of the military guys were okay, but the rest could just have been wallpaper as far as I care – give me the aliens; I am your leader! I'll tell you who needs a big, hats off is the art department, visual and special effects girls and boys. Yo, Michael Bay, learn a thing or two here for your next Transform-lamers. Michael, did you have to run your name twice within the first 20 lines of credits?! What a looser… Poser.

Good, Bad and Indifferent The first 40 minutes – look out. If your have narcolepsy make sure your buddy/husband/wife/elicit lover has a cattle prod next to ya at all times. Once those minutes are over though, you're in for a treat; great visuals and somewhat ethical think-age you may experience, so pop a vitamin before hand, okay. The story becomes quick and really refreshing after those long forty.

There's a real spin in this story and beautiful character arcs when I look back. Also, just when you think you've seen it all regarding blood and guts being sprayed about and even on ya, District 9, gives us a little more. Think, 300 – Blomkamp made this flick in that vain. Made you feel right in the mix; however, the documentary style approach in the first 40 severely clashed with the "authentic" approach (as if you are there) during the remainder of the movie – no balance and amateurish. Left some room for a sequel though. Good call, Blom. Who knows? Maybe. Just maybe.

Loved the take on aliens and humans living on the same planet with the ethical dilemmas unleashed here; really fresh, if you cut the first forty I'd gladly bump you up a star or two.

Bottom Line If you're into sci-fi you really can't go wrong – a truly unique storyline; however, wait until that rainy day and catch it at home – and fast forward the first forty, in case I forgot to mention that.

Ck - iratefilms

Julie & Julia (2009)

Bon appetite!

[7/10 · 14 August 2009]

"Julie & Julia" is based on the book by the same name, which is based on the true story by Julie Powell about "The Julie & Julia Project". Julie (Amy Adams) is a government employee working in New York City in the year following 9/11. She, her husband Eric (Chris Messina) and their cat live in an apartment above a pizza parlor. All of her friends are successful in their careers. Julie is not. Of course, we all know who Julia Child is!! Meryl Streep was a fantastic Julia Child, who started out as a bored housewife in Paris looking to fill her time and ended up being a major influence on American cuisine.

One evening, while bemoaning the lack of meaning in her life, Julie picks up Julia Child's cookbook and decides to cook all 524 recipes in the book in a year, while blogging about her experience. At first, no one is interested, but as time goes by, Julie gets more and more followers of her blog.

I liked the parallel stories of Julia and Julie. They had similar experiences, yet there were drastic differences. Julia's husband Paul (Stanley Tucci) was extremely encouraging of Julia's cooking, while Julie's husband was kind of a jerk!! He was not very supportive of Julie's project. Seriously, if someone was going to be cooking me delicious food for a year, I would be 100% encouraging them along every step of the way!! Julia and Paul had a beautiful residence (with a maid!!), while Julie and Eric lived in a tiny apartment.

I enjoyed seeing the delicious meals both Julia and Julie prepared, especially boeuf bourguignon (YUM!!!). One of my favorite scenes in the movie was when Julia's sister Dorothy (Jane Lynch) comes to Paris to visit her. It was adorable to see two grown women squealing like little girls because they are so excited to see each other. There was quite a bit of passion in this film – passion (romantic and non-romantic) for each other and passion for food.

The movie dragged a bit, with a running time of just over 2 hours – I thought some scenes could have been trimmed down a bit.

Overall an enjoyable dish – go see this movie with your mom, your sister, or your best friend. Whatever you do, DON'T go hungry because you will regret it!! Madison Monroe - iratefilms

G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra (2009)

Whatever happened to the real American Hero?

[6/10 · 14 August 2009]

Like most red-blooded American males, I grew up playing with GI Joes, so when this one was first mentioned I thought – waaaay cool, then I saw the preview and I thought, oh no! For some odd reason, the studio didn't allow early screenings or any press to see this film. Maybe they wanted our ten bucks to help dilute the close to 170 million dollar budget; they need every red cent – trust me. Merchandising is going to make up the majority of profit methinks. This was an amazing year for film, and some really great movies were out this year, but GI Joe stands alone in the comic/action genre this month – so, it should do pretty well.

GI Joe is an elite squad of classified soldiers from several nations, completely secret and extremely well trained. They are on a mission to ensure the safe delivery of four nanotech warheads, which in a nutshell, nanotechnology is like a million little bugs that can reproduce and perform single tasks. Writ large, millions of little bugs eating you would turn you into powder in seconds. So, GI Joe is there to make sure the bad guys don't get these warheads. The whole film centers around the warheads, which looked like RPGs with the bio-agents from The Rock, in fact they looked exactly like that! At any rate, it was an enjoyable action movie, tons and tons of action with limited dialog and mediocre acting all around. I would have liked to say Sienna Miller did a great job as the Baroness, but she didn't even attempt the accent – what a let down. What is the point of getting all gussied up in leather with a one-shot, twenty kill, weapon if you aren't going to wield a sultry European accent, German, French, Italian (SOMETHING) to sexy it up for the drooling masses? Many of the well known figures were displayed in the film, with some origins revealed as well. Destro, The Baroness, Snake Eyes, Storm Shadow, Rip Cord, Breaker, Duke, Hawk, Scarlet, am I missing anyone? Oh yea, Brendan Fraser was supposedly Gung Ho, but I challenge anyone to recognize him as such, he looked like a weenie. No doubt he was thrown in there because director Stephen Sommers liked working with him in the Mummy films. I'm not going to inundate you with who played who – you can check out several other sources for that intel.

Channing Tatum, as Duke is such a terrible actor, I know the ladies love him for his chiseled (action-figure like) presence – but the guy can kill a lot of scenes. I did notice he did far better in the out and out action sequences, and maybe he detracted from the acting of Marlon Wayans as Ripcord – or maybe Wayans sucks too. His delivery was stilted and forced in most shots. Scarlett (Rachel Nichols) keeps turning down his advances and there makes for some coy comedy – thankfully, very little comedy is forced into the script. And overall, the story wasn't terrible – but it wasn't terrific either. One plot loophole centered around the Baroness, but almost immediately it gets filled, so I liked that . . . plot holes irk me to no end.

This story tells how Cobra begins, thus the title, the Rise of Cobra – and while it might not have been a critically impressive film – it did make me jump in my jet-black Tiburon and speed away the whole time thinking, "man wouldn't my hood look bad ass with a Cobra decal". There are some scenes that teenagers and true action lovers will enjoy with excellent, seamless special effects in most places. The cheese factor is heavy though, which I expected after seeing the previews – but if you enjoy your action movies to really just get to the good $hit and trim the fat of reality and thoughtful prose – this is your film. Now, I have to go, I am gonna check out ebay for a Cobra decal.

Rick Swift - iratefilms

Death at a Funeral (2007)

British foolish farce masterpiece!

[8/10 · 27 July 2009]

British farce comedy at its finest, this is not pretentious and annoying like so so many other British scripts, you know the ones I mean – Four Weddings and a Funeral, the Bridget Jones series, anything starring Hugh Grant opposite another British lead. This was a guy's comedy, it is chock full of every type of humor imaginable, and while romance plays an integral part in the foolish farce, the real moments of comedy brilliance splash around in the gutter.

I love Alan Tudyk from 28 Days, Serenity and many more – always an impressive force on the screen, and while some would say he is over the top, his death scene in Serenity should surely shut his critics, soundly . . . up. I am going to be sentenced to grammar hell for that sentence. Am I giving you a headache yet? Take some Valium, dear. Peter Dinklage will stand out to many indie film lovers, he reminds me of a friend of mine from college – his acting style is classic and wonderful. Probably the guy who gets the, "I can't believe he committed to that" award goes to Andy Nyman – who really feces his fears.

The British cast may not appeal to many of my American friends, but you should recognize a few of the more memorable faces, and since this is Directed by Yoda – like it you will, or Miss Piggy will have to kick you – HIYA! Yes, it was directed by Frank Oz, no relation to Dorothy. And, yes, European actors tend not to come out of some Sneetch factory with their hair all perfect and their bodies toned. Still, I think that is what makes the casting excellent, the characters could very easily exist – and, I am sure we all will recognize certain friends or family members in some of them. Best of all with this script though, nothing unbelievable ever happens – so, be wary of the next funeral you attend. And for God's sake, have some couth, please.

If you don't laugh at this one, I think you would fail my Frasier test. That's the one where I make a potential mate watch Frasier and if she doesn't laugh at least twice in an episode – well, let's just say she doesn't get to meet mom.

Oh no, I see there is an American version of this film slotted to release in 2010 – please don't muss it about, you Yank, Chris Rock! Yes, I said Chris Rock (completely different comedic style), I am hopeful though; the new version will apparently retain the always inspirational Peter Dinklage who keeps the punch spiked throughout Frank Oz' version.

If you can catch this sucker on cable, treat yourself on a day when you are taking things a little too seriously – it'll make you smile.

Star Trek (2009)

Fascinating rebirth of a classic

[10/10 · 6 May 2009]

J. J. Abrams brings his unique writing to a classic franchise. With Star Trek, he takes by far the most influential sci-fi series of all time and dons a Jedi cloak to reinvent the franchise with more grit, grime, and guts than the classic fare.

Always with my friends was the question, which is better Star Trek or Star Wars, as Abrams claims he was never into Star Trek, I was expecting a darker, more one-dimensional Star Trek - and that is what I got. Even the music had dynamic horns and choir voices reminiscent of John Williams, except for a few scenes. Overall this will not have the same feel as any of the other movies, with the exception of the brutal Wrath of Khan - which we all know was the best of the Star Trek films - until now. Yes, I just said that, deal with it! I keep hearing, this isn't your father's Star Trek, no, it isn't - this is my son's Star Trek, and you know what - I am glad. I can keep my dad's Star Trek on the shelf and dust it off and wax nostalgic over days gone by, or I can engage to full warp and embrace this bold new interpretation on the classic. No reason they can't coexist.

Star Trek opens up with action almost immediately and only applies the dampeners a few times to fill in compelling story lines that will have you sympathetic to new and familiar characters. Telling the tale of the heroic James Tiberius Kirk and his quick advances through Star Fleet Academy, Chris Pine and Jimmy Bennett both enter the legend's boots, with dramatic success.

Zachary Quinto and Jacob Kogan both play the pointy-eared bastard, Dr. Spock as he carves out his own destiny by joining Star Fleet Academy against the Vulcan Science Academy's wishes. Spock is himself a child of two worlds, and is constantly struggling with fitting in wholly anywhere. Logic and science are his guide, while emotions of helplessness persistently haunt his thoughts.

Zoe Saldana plays the vixen du jour, Nyota Uhura - yet another member of S.F.A. Russian born Anton Yelchin naturally assumes the stammering Pavel Chekov with a few chuckle-worthy scenes, but by far my favorite character, then as now is Bones, Dr. Leonard McCoy (Karl Urban). Urban brought a smile to my face as I swear the original DeForest Kelley possessed his body from wherever great souls reside when they reach that Final Frontier. Simon Pegg managed to effectively resurrect another missed old-friend, Scotty - who of course delivered his most famous line, no doubt Pegg insisted on that, can't say I blame him one bit.

These actors not only held their own, they owned these legendary characters masterfully, let's face it, it is simply impossible to fill the shoes of the unique William Shatner and Leonard Nimoy. Pine's style and charisma comes across as genuine machismo and charm, he even gets to smooch a green-hottie, no doubt he insisted on that, can't say I blame him either. Not to be outdone, Quinto clearly has some green blood pumping through his veins. The two worked so well together in certain scenes, you forget this is just a couple of actors on the screen, you feel a certain tulpa has been created in the theater. Wonderful job guys; don't let any Trekkies tell you otherwise.

The casting was superb, kudos to all involved - whatever late night calls were placed at the last minute to pull this cast together, however much sleep was lost wondering if you got that right someone for the part - know ya' done good, folks.

It's hard to write this review in my typical non-spoiler fashion, so I will wait until I get some intense debate going here. I really must admit, I was so drawn into this movie, this story, the adventure, that I couldn't find one fault anywhere. And I gave this 6 stars because I can, I have the con - so to speak.

If you don't agree that this movie deserves the Blockbuster of the year, I guess you are just too hung up on the changes from the original concepts, the twists that make no sense to the uber-purists, but everything is accounted for in this film, no plot holes can be surmised because of the genius of J. J. Abrams. Let's not despise the fresh changes, let's embrace them as new Trekkies are recruited to boldly go where no man has gone before.