The Bullwinkle Show (TV Series)
Missouri Mish Mash: Parts 1-2 (1961)
Bill Scott: Bullwinkle J. Moose, Fearless Leader, Calvin, Clarence, Tiddler #2, Old Man, Wallace, Mr. Peabody, Additional Voices
Quotes
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Rocket J. Squirrel : Two tickets to Peaceful Valley.
Railway Clerk : First, second, or third class?
Rocket J. Squirrel : What's the difference?
Railway Clerk : First class you ride in a closed car. Second class you ride in an open car.
Rocket J. Squirrel : Gee, what's third class?
Railway Clerk : You ride *under* the car. Now, how much can you afford to spend?
Rocket J. Squirrel : Well, anything up to a dollar and a half is okay.
Bullwinkle J. Moose : Yeah. Of course that includes meals and tips.
Railway Clerk : Well, the only thing I have for a dollar and a half is our shanks mare excursion ticket.
Bullwinkle J. Moose : Sounds good. We'll take it!
Railway Clerk : You got it!
Rocket J. Squirrel : What is it?
[the Railway Clerk tosses Rocky and Bullwinkle directly onto the railroad tracks]
Bullwinkle J. Moose : We've had it.
Narrator : Yes, the shanks mare excursion ticket meant only that our heroes were allowed to *walk* the railroad tracks from Minnesota to Missouri.
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Georgiy : All is going according to plan, Fearless Leader.
Fearless Leader : Good, good. Now it is time for our man in Minnesota to take over. Who is available, Georgiy?
Georgiy : [searching through files] Well, let's see... Anastasia got caught by f-i-b.
Fearless Leader : You mean FBI.
Georgiy : That's what I said. He told an f-i-b to the FBI, and got twenty years.
Fearless Leader : Go on.
Georgiy : Englebert is visiting his mother and can't get away.
Fearless Leader : Can't get away? Where *is* his mother?
Georgiy : In San Quentin.
Fearless Leader : Oh. Well, who does that leave us?
Georgiy : I'm afraid to tell you, Fearless Leader.
Fearless Leader : Afraid? Why?
Georgiy : You'll have me liquidated for telling you bad news!
Fearless Leader : Come, come, come, Georgiy. I'm your Fearless Leader. Don't you trust me?
Georgiy : Of course!
Fearless Leader : Then *tell* me!
Georgiy : It's... it's Boris Badenov.
Fearless Leader : [furious] Schweinhund! Take him away!
[a guard grabs Georgiy and drags him out of the room]
Georgiy : But Fearless Leader!
Fearless Leader : And let this be a lesson, Georgiy! Don't trust *anybody*!
[off-screen machine gun fire]
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Narrator : Well, why is this Fearless Leader keeping tab on our heroes? Maybe we'll find out next time...
Fearless Leader : Over your dead body!
Narrator : And maybe we won't, but watch anyway for "Landslide On The Rails" or "Bullwinkle Covers His Tracks."
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Bullwinkle J. Moose : [after receiving a telegram] Read it, will ya, Rock. I don't have my glasses.
Rocket J. Squirrel : Bullwinkle, I keep telling ya, you don't wear glasses!
Bullwinkle J. Moose : Well, I said I didn't have any.
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Rocket J. Squirrel : [about the BAMBAMS] Anyway, they want you to attend the annual convention.
Bullwinkle J. Moose : Well, I don't know.
Rocket J. Squirrel : They say they're gonna elect you vice president.
Bullwinkle J. Moose : Well, I...
Rocket J. Squirrel : They say they'll pay all expenses.
Bullwinkle J. Moose : Well...
Rocket J. Squirrel : And you can bring your ukulele and sing.
Bullwinkle J. Moose : Let's pack!
