Mr. Mayor (TV Series)

The Illusion of Choice (2022)

Bobby Moynihan: Jayden Kwapis

Photos 

Quotes 

• Jayden Kwapis : The landlord will only rent to a Scorpio. And I'm a...

  Mikaela Shaw : Obvious Pisces. Ugh, better luck next time, Jayden.

  Tommy Tomás : Whoa, whoa, whoa. What? Not only is this discrimination, it's dumb discrimination based on a pseudoscience.

  Mikaela Shaw : So you agree, it's a science.

• Tommy Tomás : I thought you lived with your mom.

  Jayden Kwapis : I did, okay? But she raised the rent to $1,400 and 20 kisses a month. And both prices are too steep, okay? I'm not made of kisses.

• Mikaela Shaw : So, Jayden, what am I looking at here?

  Jayden Kwapis : [office security video playing on laptop]  This is where the bad chairs go!

  [clanging] 

  Jayden Kwapis : Fire!

  [clanging] 

  Jayden Kwapis : Fire!

  Jayden Kwapis : Okay, I can explain. I'm a sleepwalker. Ever since I went to a show at the Magic Castle and I heckled a hypnotist...