The Office: Blackmail (TV Series)

Andy (2009)

Creed Bratton: Creed Bratton

Photos 

Quotes 

• Andy Bernard : What are you gonna do with this?

  Creed Bratton : It depends on you, my friend. You can make a small contribution to the William Charles Schneider Memorial Fund. You can make this all go away or else!

  [he makes a throat slit gesture] 

  Andy Bernard : You're going to kill me?

  Creed Bratton : That's probably the wrong gesture. I was trying to indicate that it will be very bad for you.

  Andy Bernard : That was the wrong gesture cause that is like... It's like I'm gonna slit your throat.

  Creed Bratton : No, I'm not gonna do that.

  Andy Bernard : If it's bad, you just be like-

  [he waves his finger] 

  Andy Bernard : You know, like...

  Creed Bratton : Alright. Enough of this small talk! Okay? Are you going to pay me or not?

  Andy Bernard : I don't know, Creed. I'm like really freaked out and confused.

  Creed Bratton : Make up your mind quickly or else.

  [he waves his finger] 

  Andy Bernard : [talking head]  I don't know what I'm gonna do and I'm freaking out. And I haven't freaked out in a decision like this since I had to choose between Here Comes Treble, Treble In Paradise, The Trebleshooters and The Finger Lake Maestros.

• Creed Bratton : [whispering to Andy]  What's it gonna be?

  Andy Bernard : Ooh, wow! You're so gratuitously creepy, Creed. You know that?

  Creed Bratton : Thank you.

  Andy Bernard : You know what it's gonna be? In about two seconds, you're not gonna have anything to lord over me. Excuse me. I have an announcement to make! And that announcement is look at this! Okay?

  [he shows off his Japanese tattoo] 

  Andy Bernard : Just look!

  [talking head] 

  Andy Bernard : Yes, I do have a tattoo. I got it during my semester at sea.

  Kelly Kapoor : Oh, my God! Do you have a tramp stamp?

  Andy Bernard : No, Kelly! I don't have a tramp stamp.

  [talking head] 

  Andy Bernard : No, I don't have a tramp stamp. Yes, it does happen to be on my lower back. Yes, it does mean Nard Dog. No, I don't regret it. Yes, I am having it laser removed.

• Creed Bratton : This blackmail game is hard work. I'm gonna need a little nap.

  [he overhears Meredith talking on the phone] 

  Meredith Palmer : Frank is finally paying me child support. No. Jake's biological father is too. Hahaha! Yeah. I bought myself a kegerator. Well, we kind of drink at home cause I can't drive anymore cause of my DUI.

  Creed Bratton : I feel great after that nap. Totally refreshed. Ready to blackmail that Indian chick.