F.C. De Kampioenen (TV Series)
Xavier gekwetst (1991)
Walter Michiels: Pico Coppens
Photos
Quotes
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Dimitri : [Xavier fools Dimitri with Pico's foreknowledge; Pascale doesn't know Xavier pretends to be a mentally disabled person] Guys.
Pascale : Dimitri.
Pico : Hi, Dimitri.
Dimitri : Pascale. Get me a beer, please. Give the guys something. Put in on my tab. And get something for yourself, too.
Pico : What are you celebrating, Dimitri?
Dimitri : Nothing. I'm treating you. Just like that. How are you guys?
Pico : [looks at Xavier] Fine. Just fine. Right, Xavier?
Xavier : Yes. Fine.
Dimitri : You look that way. You get out much, uh?
[he nods approving, talks gibberish]
Xavier : Thank you, uh...
Dimitri : [worried] Dimitri.
Xavier : Yes, 'Joske'.
Dimitri : No, it's Dimitri.
Xavier : No, Joske. Not Dimitri. Xavier.
Dimitri : Err. The incident with the ball. I was just kidding back there. That's all forgotten. My coveralls have been washed. They're clean again.
Xavier : So you've been washed, Joske?
Dimitri : You do remember that you've kicked the ball in some mud, uh?
Xavier : No.
Dimitri : And I've kicked the ball back. I was kidding when I did that.
Xavier : Have you?
Pico : Against your head, Xavier.
Dimitri : I didn't intend to. It was more of a loose ball because of the wind.
Xavier : Yes. There's much lost wind today. Everywhere.
Dimitri : Much wind, yes. Much wind.
[looks more worried]
Xavier : Northeast wind. Coming from the wrong corner. You don't see it coming.
-
Carmen : [Carmen and Doortje enter the cafe, they're worried about Xavier, who's actually faking] Well? Xavier?
Xavier : Carmen.
[Xavier walks up to Doortje and kisses her; Pico is furious, Carmen hits Xavier on the head with her purse]
Pascale : Pico, his gaze is still cloudy.
Pico : Yeah well, clear or not, he must keep his hands off my wife.
Carmen : You're right, Pico. Besides, his gaze has always been cloudy.
Pascale : That's not a compliment to yourself, or is it, Carmen?
Carmen : Where are his clothes? I have to work at Boma's.
Xavier : Oh, now I see it. *You* are Carmen. I can hear it now.
Carmen : [she's angry] Stop pretending, alright.
Bieke : You have to spare him a little. He's shocked.
Carmen : Shocked? You're right, I shouldn't have hit him with my purse.
Xavier : Thanks, Carmen.
Carmen : I should've brought my rolling pin with me instead.
Oscar : Calm down, Carmen. Go to work and leave him with us. He can come to his senses here. Come get him after work.
Carmen : Fine with me. That might be for the best.
Xavier : Can't I just go with you? I'm not sick, am I?
Carmen : Do you want to come home with me already?
Xavier : Yeah, what else can I do here?
Carmen : [because he never wants to leave the cafe on his own] Keep him here, Oscar. He's not okay yet.
Doortje : Pico, I'll ride with Carmen so I can prepare dinner.
Pico : Alright, Doortje.
Xavier : [to Doortje, he comes out of his chair] Shall *I* take you home?
Pico : [he aggressively pulls him back] You stay here. Go with Carmen, Doortje. I'll be home soon.
[they throw each other a kiss, Xavier does it as well]
Pico : Not you, fool.
Xavier : No, I want to give Carmen a kiss.
[Xavier gets up]
Pascale : Oscar, watch out. He thinks you're Carmen.
[Xavier gives Carmen a kiss]
Doortje : Don't stay too long, uh Pico.
Pico : No, Doortje. I'll see you in a bit.
Xavier : [with erotic intonation] 'Don't stay too long, Carmen'.
Carmen : Oh boy. Will he ever be okay again?
-
Pico : [Xavier pretends to be mentally disabled, the others believe it's real] Have a drink. You'll feel better again.
[he drinks a little shot of beer]
Oscar : Not so fast. Watch out for his stomach.
Xavier : Drink. *Drink*...
Oscar : A glass of milk maybe?
Xavier : [he shakes his head] Well...
Pico : [to Pascale] Tap him another pint.
Xavier : Drink...
Pico : Yeah, you take it easy. Keep calm.
[but he drinks fast]
Pascale : [looking on as he drinks] To me, he looks just fine again.
Oscar : Alright then. Give us something too, Pascale. We could use it.
[but Xavier fakes that he passes out]
Pascale : Where's Xavier?
[they turn around]
Oscar : Dammit, Skavier! Come on, put him upright. Against the counter, come on.
Pico : He's still a bit limp in the legs.
Pascale : Everyone's had a fainting spell in their life, right?
Pico : Xavier, are you okay or not?
Xavier : Sure. I'm just a little giddy. That's all.
Oscar : At least he can talk again.
Xavier : [he's almost crying like a baby] Can I have a beer?
Pico : You've had enough for a while, haven't you? By the way, your eyes are still a bit far apart.
Pascale : Come on, let me see. Little deviation. Nothing abnormal. Not for him anyway.
Xavier : [he looks at Pascale] Carmen. Carmen? Give me a kiss, will you?
[Xavier kisses Pascale, infuriating her]
Pascale : Let go of me, fool!
Xavier : Do you have a headache again, Carmen?
[Pascale hits him on the head with her platter]
Oscar : Pascale, what are you doing? You've just hit someone with a concussion in the head.
Pascale : Concussion? He's a freeloader. That's who it is.
Bieke : Mom, you can't do that.
Oscar : [they're to lead him to the table] Lads, make room.
Pico : Pascale, just because he's regained consciousness doesn't mean his gaze is clear yet.
Bieke : Come on now. Have a seat, Xavier.
Xavier : You do understand me, don't you Bieke?
Bieke : Sure, Xavier. I'll get you a pint.
Xavier : [to the others] She totally gets me.
Oscar : What?
[Oscar bends over, Xavier looks at the top of Oscar's balding head]
Xavier : Have you fallen on your head, too?
[Oscar laughs, then steps back]
Oscar : Pico, he's not okay yet.
Pico : If I ever get a hold of DDT, I'll give him a piece of my mind.
Pascale : Hopefully he's well insured.
Pico : Insured or not, he won't get out of this cheaply.
Xavier : Pint...
[Bieke brings him his pint, he smiles and drinks; Pascale has reservations]
