Tales from the Crypt (TV Series) None But the Lonely Heart (1992) User Reviews

Excellent episode

[Woodyanders · 8/10 · 19 June 2011]

Smooth and charming con man Howard Prince (superbly played to the shifty and ingratiating hilt by Treat Williams) finds wealthy old widows to marry through a video dating service and bumps the old ladies off for their sizable inheritances. However, Prince's streak is about to come to an abrupt and grisly end as both time and the harsh consequences of his immoral actions finally catch up with him. Director Tom Hanks, working from a sharp and witty script by Donald Longtooth, relates the hugely entertaining story at a constant quick pace, maintains an engagingly dark, yet lighthearted tone throughout, further enhances things with a winning sense of spot-on pitch-black humor, and stages one genuinely startling doozy of a seriously gruesome and macabre climax with all of Prince's wives coming back to life as revolting zombies who all want a piece of him. Moreover, Hanks delivers several moments of shockingly brutal violence with real skill and assurance. Williams holds the whole show together with his terrific portrayal of one remarkably slick heel; he receives fine support from Frances Sternhagen as his passionate latest mark Effie Gluckman, Henry Gibson as Effie's loyal and suspicious butler Stanhope, Hanks as video dating service owner Baxter (who meets a memorably savage end when Price puts his head through a TV screen!), Clive Rosengren as Prince's sensible business partner Morty, and boxing legend Sugar Ray Leonard as a mysterious gravedigger. John R. Leonetti's glossy cinematography gives this episode a pleasing polished look. Jay Ferguson's lively and elegant score likewise does the stirring trick. A worthy start for the fourth season.

Great episode.

[shellytwade · 8/10 · 13 April 2022]

Definitely one of the better episodes of the series. Tom Hanks directs and he shows us that he can handle darker humor like the best of them when given the chance. It's too bad he didn't do more projects like this and The Burbs. Nothing really new here, just executed well!

"The fastest way to a woman's heart is with a pick axe." Great tale from the crypt.

[poolandrews · 8/10 · 19 March 2007]

Tales from the Crypt: None But the Lonely Heart starts as a charming & handsome but devious & murdering conman named Howard Prince (Treat Williams) attends the funeral of his latest rich elderly wife to die, the latest in a long line of many as he gains their love & trust only to kill them & get all their money. However the plan is starting to attract the wrong sort of attention so Howard & his partner Morty (Clive Roengren) decide to split the country but Howard isn't satisfied with the paltry 5 million they have made already & wants one last big payday, he decides to rip-off a wealthy widow named Elizabeth (Constance Pfeifer) but things turn out nasty...

This Tales from the Crypt story was episode 1 from season 4, amazingly directed by Hollywood superstar Tom Hanks I thought this was an excellent way to open season 4. The script by Donald Longtooth was based on a story from the 'Tales from the Crypt' comic book & is a fantastic story of a conman getting his just deserts in a trademark Tales from the Crypt twisted twist ending that is a perfect way to round the story off, the build up & the setting up of the story is very good as it maintains one interest & there's enough murder, blackmail & intrigue going on to entertain for it's 30 odd minute duration. This one starts off looking like as if it's going to be a standard & predictable morality tale but the satisfying horror themed ending that comes from nowhere really makes this story & lifts this above the average.

Unbelievably directed by Tom Hanks who is now one of Hollywood's biggest stars he does a good job & the film has a nice look about it, it's well made & he even appears in this episode. There's not much gore but there's some terrific zombie effects including popped out eyeballs, rotten flesh & wriggling worms. The acting is good here as well & Hanks gets his head shoved into a TV which some may think is worth watching on it's own & legendary boxer Sugar Ray Leonard makes an appearance only to get eaten by zombies...

None But the Lonely Heart is a great Tales from the Crypt episode & a terrific way to start season 4, hopefully the season will carry on in this vein (sorry, the Crypt Keeper himself wouldn't even use that pun).

My absolute favorite Tales f/t Crypt-episode!!

[Coventry · 15 March 2006]

For the first episode of the fourth season, HBO managed to trap no less than Tom Hanks into co-starring and even directing a wonderfully distasteful tale. Quite an effort because, even though Hanks debuted in horror (in a forgotten 80's slasher called "He Knows You're Alone"), he was mainly occupied with doing comedy and drama during the time this episode got released. "None but the Lonely Heart" is fantastic entertainment and features a lot of gore, delightful black humor and a truly splendid performance by Treat Williams. He plays smooth but utterly shifty Howard Prince who successfully entices lonely but very rich old widows before poisoning them & claiming the inheritance. Meanwhile, Howard surely doesn't hesitate to eliminate third parties that come too close to discovering his working methods. Granted, the plot outline is among of the oldest and most overused ones in cinema, but Hanks' approach to the subject matter is surprisingly raw and very comical. Howard's macabre intentions are so obvious and yet he appears to be so natural and reliable that even the most sober widow would fall for him. The hilariously grotesque finale is indescribably cool and the make-up effects are downright nauseating. Hanks himself stars as the contact person of a dating service and there are other supportive roles for Frances Sternhagen ("Misery", "Outland") and Sugar Ray Leonard as the mysterious gravedigger. If this episode happens to be your first acquaintance with the show, I guarantee you'll be a fan for life!

Good episode ruined by grossness

[bellino-angelo2014 · 6/10 · 26 June 2021]

Howard Prince is a criminal that marries rich widows and after a while murders them for having their inheritance. During a funeral his partner in crime recommends him to run before he can be found. Howard decides to do so but not before one last hit: he succedds to charm Effie Gluckman but after a while he notices that someone sends him letters for stopping or else he'll have to face dire consequences (and he will find out in the graveyard).

Despite the episode is directed by Tom Hanks (and he even has a cameo as the video store owner) it was a bit confusing. But what really turned me off was the ending part where are all the past victims of Howard returned to life and some were even in the decaying state. And this makes me lose some points.

"You do know my heart!"

[Foreverisacastironmess123 · 7/10 · 16 June 2018]

I never cared for Treat Williams too much as an actor, but he does play ruthless and charming quite well, and I do totally buy him in this tale as a murderous conman who's just a little too psychotic somewhere to ever love anything but money and who kills anyone whom he suspects of threatening his scheme as he woos and romances one rich old lady after another until they sign over their wealth and then he discreetly murders them and moves on to his next target, until the night when he walks into a trap and finds that all of his past wives have inexplicably returned from the grave to get one last ghoulish midnight rendezvous with their 'beloved' Howard and make him pay for so cruelly playing with their affections and betraying their lonely hearts... Tom Hanks did a decent job directing this episode, and like the directors of "The Switch" and "The Trap", he even puts in a quick cameo, and it's one of the funnest parts of the episode as he gets his pompous head shoved through a TV screen! I really didn't like the weird effect they did when they replay the moment with a triple-cut, which they do again when the young gravedigger gets killed with the shovel, I don't know what they were going for but the effect just looked laughable and was just a cheap way of trying to make violent scenes appear more impressive. I guess it's just a case of the good old E.C. dark karma at work, but I still don't get why the old ladies came back from the dead, there's nothing supernatural that's so much as hinted at in the story, things just take a hard right turn into zombie horror right at the end, and as awesome as it is, it's just a bit confusing. They should have snuck in a quick scene with the gravedigger practicing voodoo or something.. Anyhow I love the ending and I love the makeup done on the zombie biddies, especially the really messed up one that's some kind of puppet, with the mouth full of worms, skeleton arms, and the rotting eye that falls out of the socket, that one was awesome! Always great to see a few zombies grace the hallowed dank halls of the Crypt! To me this isn't one of the best ever season openers of the show but it's still a fun and entertaining little romp nevertheless, I mean what's more horrifying than randy old ladies? It ain't too bad at all for an old wives Tale! X

Old wives

[SleepTight666 · 8/10 · 15 June 2010]

A great start to Season 4! This episode was gory, funny, well-written and full of incredible guest stars.

The episode is about a con man who made old rich ladies fall in love with him, until he poisons them and keeps their money.

The episode had a high-body count, with some of the deaths being pretty cool. Tom Hanks in particular as he gets thrown into a TV screen and gets electrocuted.

One of the most memorable endings yet also happens in this episode as the man is driven to the graveyard by a gravedigger where his dead wives await him and apparently eat him/tear him apart.

Overall, one of the better episodes yet.