The Honeymooners (TV Series)

Dial J for Janitor (1956)

Art Carney: Ed Norton

Photos 

Quotes 

• Norton : Well anyway, I gotta tell ya I had this headache, I couldn't get rid of it, see, so I went to the Navy doctor. So he examines me and says I have pressure on the brain, he should remove it. So well, I took a lot of kidding from the boys on the ship, you know, 'cause afterwards they said, "What did he do, remove the pressure or the brain?"

  Ralph : Don't ask me, 'cause I know what he removed!

• Alice : [Norton had asked Alice for a wrench to fix his pipes]  I thought the janitor was gonna fix the pipes.

  Norton : Ah, that janitor fix the pipes. He don't fix nothing. I'm telling ya, I'm getting pretty sick and tired of this, you know. Everybody in the building gets water, except us.

  Alice : I know, Ed, and it's no joke.

  Norton : You tell me it's no joke. Boy, I never thought I'd live to see the day when I'd work eight hours in the sewer and come home and want to see water!

• Ralph Kramden : Can I get you anything?

  Ed Norton : Yes, water, water, water. I want water.

  Ralph Kramden : I hope there's some water on the Moon, 'cause that's where you're gonna end up.