The Golden Girls (TV Series)

Mrs. George Devereaux (1990)

Estelle Getty: Sophia Petrillo

Quotes 

• Blanche Devereaux : I'm back to my old self, Blanche Devereaux has returned.

  Sophia Petrillo : Oh boy. Strike up the gland...

  [she leaves the room] 

  Blanche Devereaux : How rude. You'd think she'd feel sorry for me.

  Rose Nylund : To tell you the truth, I don't feel sorry for you either. I mean, why should I? My Charlie is dead, and nobody's giving me a second chance. Listen, Blanche, I know what it's like to have a husband suddenly taken. I never had a chance to say all those things I would have wanted to say. Well, you must know how that feels.

  Blanche Devereaux : Yes, but after what he did to me...

  Rose Nylund : Blanche, this isn't about getting even. For nine years you've been missing George. Well he's here, and I'm jealous of you. Tell him you love him, tell him you hate him, I don't care, but just see him before he leaves. Do it for yourself. Do it for all of us who wish we had the chance.

• Rose Nylund : Someone was actually able to deceive me once.

  Sophia Petrillo : Do tell, Rose.

  Rose Nylund : St. Olaf's most famous OBMAG.

  Dorothy Petrillo Zbornak : What's that?

  Rose Nylund : Obstetrician-Magician. The Amazing Shapiro. He delivered Bridget. But it was so confusing. "It's a girl! Now it's a dove... Now it's a glass of milk." I don't know how he got her in that deck of cards, but there she was right after the King of Hearts. "Is this your baby?"

• Sophia Petrillo : [after meeting George]  He's alive alright, I poked him with a stick!

• George Devereaux : Blanche honey, I staged my death.

  Sophia Petrillo : [eavesdropping from outside]  He stained his desk?

  Blanche Devereaux : But George, I arranged your funeral. The eulogy. The flowers. I even watched them put you in the family mausoleum.

  George Devereaux : Well, what can I say, Blanche? Thanks.

• Dorothy Petrillo Zbornak : [discussing the fact that she has two celebrities - Sonny Bono and Lyle Waggoner - competing for her affections]  I wanted to tell you sooner, but, well, I was afraid that you might not believe me.

  Sophia Petrillo : And why should we, Miss Junior Prom 1946?

  Dorothy Petrillo Zbornak : Ma, you promised.

  Sophia Petrillo : Dating the quarterback, she says. Buys her own corsage, spends the evening hiding in the basement, slow-dancing with a rake! Would have gotten away with it, too, but while she was giving herself hickeys with the vacuum cleaner, she stepped into a puddle.

  Dorothy Petrillo Zbornak : To most mothers, that would be a cry for affection. To you, it's just ammo.

• Lyle Waggoner : Yes, it's me, Lyle Waggoner. No autographs.

  Sophia Petrillo : No problem.

  Dorothy Petrillo Zbornak : Ma!

  Sophia Petrillo : If this is true, I'm rooting for Sonny - you know, the paisan. Besides, there's something about this guy that just honks me off.