The Beverly Hillbillies (TV Series)
Our Hero the Banker (1969)
Irene Ryan: Daisy Moses
Photos
Quotes
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Daisy Moses : My first present is a jar of my homemade pickled owl gizzards. And my second present is free medical treatment.
Lance Bradford : Thanks. They go together nicely.
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Mrs. Margaret Drysdale : You've always been a thorn in my side.
Daisy Moses : I can change that to a fist in your mouth!
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Daisy Moses : Oh please, Jed, let me throw an uppercut to one of her chins.
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Daisy Moses : Oh please, Jed, just let me give her one barrel.
Jed Clampett : No.
Daisy Moses : I'll give her a 50-foot runnin' start.
Jed Clampett : Nope.
Daisy Moses : A hundred foot, and you can hold my glasses.
Jed Clampett : Now, hold your glasses is a real good idea.
[takes Granny's glasses]
Daisy Moses : Hand me that gun, Jed, I can still salt her britches!
Jed Clampett : Nope.
Daisy Moses : I can't miss a target that big!
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Daisy Moses : Jed, can I have my glasses and shotgun back?
Jed Clampett : You could have had your glasses if you hadn't asked for the shotgun.
Daisy Moses : Whatcha mean?
Jed Clampett : I'm afraid you still got it in for Mrs. Drysdale.
Daisy Moses : Well I asked the Lord to fill my heart with love for the woman, like you said.
Jed Clampett : Did He do?
Daisy Moses : Jed, is it my fault that he don't like her neither?
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Elly May Clampett : [Granny is carrying a shotgun] Granny, where are ya goin'?
Daisy Moses : I'm takin' these vittles over to Mrs. Drysdale.
Elly May Clampett : Vittles? Well where are they?
Daisy Moses : Right in here.
[pats her shotgun]
Daisy Moses : Rock salt and bacon rind. I'm gonna give her both barrels.