"Herz in Flammen" is a German television film from 2002, so this one has its 20th anniversary soon and maybe it happened already depending on when you read this review. But what would be even better is younever coming across this title and film page because the film is not showing anymore. Sadly, if you read this, then you did, which means it is still showing, even if there is no justification. The title means "heart in flames" of course, which foreign audiences already guesses perhaps, but then again I don't really think non-German viewers will even come here because I doubt this film is shown/available abroad. Anyway, there are really many German television films out there from the 21st century that are really weak in my opinion, not to say horrible, and this is absolutely one of them. Horrible is no understatement here. It is a bit unusual that these films have the same writer and director, but here it is the case with Berno Kürten. He is still active today by the way. However, if you take a look at his body of work, then it becomes very quickly painfully clear what to expect, namely a film that is lower than low and basically a failure from every perspective you could take. Takes a long while to find something positive here. Kürten's co-writer by the way is Jürgen Wolff and actually I would say that his body of work looks slightly better, but that one is absolutely not great either and really only superior because Kürten's is this week. As for the cast, no saving grace there either. The best (i.e. worst) example is actress Anja Kling being the female lead in here. Surprises me a bit she is first cast because honestly I felt as if the male lead was more in the center of the film, but it could also be because she is the much bigger name. Not many knew Andreas Brucker back then and even fewer do today. Which is probably extremely justified if he has been part of "Verbotene Liebe" ("Forbidden Love"), a trashy German soap opera for more than a decade. Still I believe he is not as bad as Kling, who is downright terrible. And not just here, but in almost every film I saw her in. Now the perhaps biggest supporting player here, namely Max Tidof, is a more familiar name and I also kinda felt he is a better actor and has no business being in trashy films like this one. Shamefully. In general, the male cast members are frequently much more known than the one at the center of it all. Admittedly Ilja Richter is also not known for his range and versatility, but still he is known. Or Ralf Wolter, who is still alive today and really old now. But these two play very minor characters in here. Blink and you will miss them. Okay, so much for the basics.
Now I want to talk a bit about why I thought this was a downright terrible film, give a few scenes and inclusions as examples although I have to say right away that I would rather forget this mess of a movie as soon as possible and also that, if I mentioned every moment when this film is a failure, I would quickly run into the character limit, so not a complete overview, but just a few examples. The key story of it all is telling enough basically. The moment when the two protagonists meet for the first time is actually probably the most important and at the same time the most cringeworthy scene of the entire movie. And that means quite something. It was so bad that I honestly felt it could simply be a dream sequence, but they were genuinely serious with that. It was reality. Unreal. But as much as the core may suck, the attention to detail is also missing in these smaller moments like when we have Tidof's character talk his friend into doing something for him and how we see his reaction when he agrees. I mean nobody could have made this utterly stupid screenplay work, but still sometimes the cast even manages to take it down another level. Oh wait, another contender for worst scene and moment is when they are channeling their inner Tootsie here without any kind of talent though. I honestly did not trust my eyes when we see him/her there sit on the chair and give this utterly pretentious interview and we were supposed to believe what (s)he said was deep and meaningful. But it was just a travesty, never realistic, never dramatically significant and, most of all, never funny. Just trashy and void of talent. And also not the fun kind that is so absurd that it is funny. It's just absurd. Okay, there was one moment actually when Tidof's character is asked again after the male protagonist brabbling about allegedlydeep and meaningful stuff if he understands his buddy, and he just replies with a cold "no" and that was extremely accurate because all he said felt fake and scripted, but yeah I feel pretty bad for people who actually saw truth and depth in this pseudo-important rambling. Besides, it was difficult to imagine here honestly that the two male characters were indeed such close friend, not necessarily only because they were so different, but also because of that and there wasn't a lot of chemistry. Also, in the end, of course the two lovebird get together and (definitely!) live together for the rest of their lives because they are so perfect for each other. So them meeting again was huge coincidence, but hey it is still realistic because it was fate that they end up together right? Yeah, right. And don't even get me started about the kiosk owner about his selective memory and his talking near the end about the male protagonist's alleged partner. And how Kling acts when said kiosk owner says something like he believes he never actually had one or many women in his life. Cringe 100%. Oh wait, I was supposed to find it cute didn't I. Okay, I think this is pretty much all then. I remember seeing another German small screen release about a similar subject. Heino Ferch there also plays a writer posing under a female alias. That one was pretty bad already, but this one here is even worse. Honestly, the only moment they are getting it right is when Kling's character (the name Beate was still considered freh in 2002 apparently) is disenchanted and says that all this romantic literature is nonsense and also makes fun of the title of the book, which is the title of this movie. But yeah, this was obviously meant as the wrong approach where she does not see clear. The accurate approach according to the writers here is that we are supposed to see the male protagonist's writing as high quality, to see him as a great artist, who is struggling because he may have lost the love of his life and also struggles physically from then on. She does not of course because she is a tough self-confident successful businesswoman and this is because the film is obviously directed at female audiences mostly. So she has a suitor too for us not to forget how amazing she is and that was also very cringeworthy, especially when said suitor realizes she is not the one for him. Man there are so many terrible moments in here. Honestly, I am not at all pro banning writers from the industry, but the ones here you should actually have forced into writing class before allowing them to be in charge of another screenplay again. Such an abomination. Enough now. Terrible film. Big thumbs-down.
Now I want to talk a bit about why I thought this was a downright terrible film, give a few scenes and inclusions as examples although I have to say right away that I would rather forget this mess of a movie as soon as possible and also that, if I mentioned every moment when this film is a failure, I would quickly run into the character limit, so not a complete overview, but just a few examples. The key story of it all is telling enough basically. The moment when the two protagonists meet for the first time is actually probably the most important and at the same time the most cringeworthy scene of the entire movie. And that means quite something. It was so bad that I honestly felt it could simply be a dream sequence, but they were genuinely serious with that. It was reality. Unreal. But as much as the core may suck, the attention to detail is also missing in these smaller moments like when we have Tidof's character talk his friend into doing something for him and how we see his reaction when he agrees. I mean nobody could have made this utterly stupid screenplay work, but still sometimes the cast even manages to take it down another level. Oh wait, another contender for worst scene and moment is when they are channeling their inner Tootsie here without any kind of talent though. I honestly did not trust my eyes when we see him/her there sit on the chair and give this utterly pretentious interview and we were supposed to believe what (s)he said was deep and meaningful. But it was just a travesty, never realistic, never dramatically significant and, most of all, never funny. Just trashy and void of talent. And also not the fun kind that is so absurd that it is funny. It's just absurd. Okay, there was one moment actually when Tidof's character is asked again after the male protagonist brabbling about allegedlydeep and meaningful stuff if he understands his buddy, and he just replies with a cold "no" and that was extremely accurate because all he said felt fake and scripted, but yeah I feel pretty bad for people who actually saw truth and depth in this pseudo-important rambling. Besides, it was difficult to imagine here honestly that the two male characters were indeed such close friend, not necessarily only because they were so different, but also because of that and there wasn't a lot of chemistry. Also, in the end, of course the two lovebird get together and (definitely!) live together for the rest of their lives because they are so perfect for each other. So them meeting again was huge coincidence, but hey it is still realistic because it was fate that they end up together right? Yeah, right. And don't even get me started about the kiosk owner about his selective memory and his talking near the end about the male protagonist's alleged partner. And how Kling acts when said kiosk owner says something like he believes he never actually had one or many women in his life. Cringe 100%. Oh wait, I was supposed to find it cute didn't I. Okay, I think this is pretty much all then. I remember seeing another German small screen release about a similar subject. Heino Ferch there also plays a writer posing under a female alias. That one was pretty bad already, but this one here is even worse. Honestly, the only moment they are getting it right is when Kling's character (the name Beate was still considered freh in 2002 apparently) is disenchanted and says that all this romantic literature is nonsense and also makes fun of the title of the book, which is the title of this movie. But yeah, this was obviously meant as the wrong approach where she does not see clear. The accurate approach according to the writers here is that we are supposed to see the male protagonist's writing as high quality, to see him as a great artist, who is struggling because he may have lost the love of his life and also struggles physically from then on. She does not of course because she is a tough self-confident successful businesswoman and this is because the film is obviously directed at female audiences mostly. So she has a suitor too for us not to forget how amazing she is and that was also very cringeworthy, especially when said suitor realizes she is not the one for him. Man there are so many terrible moments in here. Honestly, I am not at all pro banning writers from the industry, but the ones here you should actually have forced into writing class before allowing them to be in charge of another screenplay again. Such an abomination. Enough now. Terrible film. Big thumbs-down.