Central Park (2017)
3/10
It just didn't do it for me
21 August 2020
I like simple slasher flicks. Always have, always will. This low budget B-flick had all the makings for a mindless, bad-decision making, buckets-of-blood slasher, but it simply never gets off the ground.

Typically, I rate movies based on the "enjoyment factor," and "did the film hold my attention for its duration..." simple feelings like that. Central Park NEVER came close to either of those two things. T

The pace is tediously slow, as the first near 45 minutes are filled with idle chit-chat...for character development. It was WAY overdone, and frankly, boring. The main 5-6 characters are high school kids, so the dialog is uninteresting. At about the 45 minute mark we see the first sign of "action." As the final act opens up, I had already been let down by the single so-far-still the only "action," as I waited scene after scene for "more action." And that's how it went. I spent the entire movie waiting for MORE...more anything, except idle chit-chat.

As of today (Aug 20, 2020) there is only one other review on IMDb, and that review speaks glowingly high about pretty much everything [as if often the case with these fake reviews, written by accts that have no action but the single review. I'm not saying that Is the case here, but there are number of the reviewer's opinions that I not only disagree with, but are factually incorrect. Those two, in combination, lead me to believe the review is all hype. It is nowhere near the film s/he sees unfolding.

I would consider Central Park as a barely average b-horror flick. The blood/gore was way almost non-existent, and the kills were uninspiring & bland. The script had its moments too, but wanders in to unrelated territory as if just to fill. Just as with the rest of the film, the entire movie script delivers a final product that lacks any real meat. Put simply...it was just a bore.
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