Miami Magma (2011 TV Movie)
3/10
Sadly semi-solid and light on the schlock
6 March 2020
Movies can be made with many purposes in mind: to entertain, to provoke, to express or elicit emotion. This movie neither failed, nor succeeded in any of these categories to a great degree.

The acting was serviceable, neither good nor laughable. The script failed to register any response or provoke any emotion. The camera work was...decent? Ok? The packing was solid though, never sticking in one place or on one scene for very long. The only parts that were enjoyable were the three or four truly schlocky moments, which are what people watch disaster movies for. Those ranged from, "That doesn't work that way." to "Yes! Hole! Through! The chest!" The effects are suitably TV movie level and thus, the most ironically enjoyable part of the film.

Neither painful to sit through, nor enjoyable enough to sit through again, nor recommend it.
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