I am a big fan of horror-movie silliness. One such example is how the horror events are initiated here. An African guy arrives uninvited to the house of the widower of a woman that helped the African during his childhood. It's basically the black guy saying something like "I owe your wife a lot, and so to repay my debt to her, I bring you this gift - a huge spider that will start killing people off randomly and make your life miserable". Not in these exact words, of course, but that's basically what he came for.
It makes little sense, especially his smashing of his "gift", which resulted in his own demise - indicating that he didn't know what the hell he was bringing. And yet, we were previously led to believe that he did know.
But yeah, ignore logic. The main thing is that the writer got an excuse to unleash the spider! Sure, he could have done this in a much more intelligent, more convincing way, but I guess logic (and especially writing) isn't his strong suit.
There is more bizarre nonsense later on too. For example the bizarre sheriff, played with B-movie zeal by the highly untalented nepotist Denise Crosby, prying into whassername's private affairs, just because whassername was freaked out by a kid screaming at the window. Well, it's either that or because the local sheriff is bored and likes to pick up the latest gossip. I didn't realize a sheriff's job description included being a psychologist to random strangers, even if the cop in question happens to be a woman.
Not that I immediately realized that Crosby was a female sheriff.
In fact, every time Sheriff Crosby appears, her character just gets weirder and dumber. One of her assistant cops is cast as a weird-looking slacker type from a Linklater indie flick. The whole film is like this: off. Tilted to the side. To the side of unnecessary silliness.
Rather silly is the nurse's reaction when she shoves her kids out of the spider-infested room: instead of following them outside, she STAYS inside, as some sort of pointless moment of self-sacrifice - as if having herself killed right in front of them will somehow be beneficial to her kids. She had plenty of time to leave the room, hence her decision was a laughably over-dramatic plot-device decision from the awful writers.
Speaking of dramatic, there is way too much family drama here, especially for a horror film. A MONSTER flick with characterization! Yeah, we sure needed that. We are constantly bored with her flashbacks and her pill addiction. I mean, it's not even a proper addiction like heroin or crack!
The spiders start wrecking havoc only ONE HOUR into the movie. So yes, you've been warned. By the time they finally go on the attack against humans, you will be so utterly bored you won't give a hoot. Or you might even be rooting for them.
Then again... the cat. Unforgivable. Spiders are definitely the bad guys here.
When asked how she bumped her head, the girl says: "I was looking for kitty-cat in the sticky snow with the dolls." Of course, if she had simply said "I was trying to find the missing cat in the huge-ass spider web that's covered the entire attic as well as all my dolls" then the plot would have gone forward, moving somewhere. Alas, kids get used as padding, as goofy plot-devices to stretch out a thin plot about a large spider invading a house. Because nobody ever believes them. And because they speak Nonsensese at the most inopportune moments. Well, I did say the writing was pitiful.
Why are the three of them allowed to remain in the house after the owner is found killed by something that might indicate a biological threat? No explanation there either.
It makes little sense, especially his smashing of his "gift", which resulted in his own demise - indicating that he didn't know what the hell he was bringing. And yet, we were previously led to believe that he did know.
But yeah, ignore logic. The main thing is that the writer got an excuse to unleash the spider! Sure, he could have done this in a much more intelligent, more convincing way, but I guess logic (and especially writing) isn't his strong suit.
There is more bizarre nonsense later on too. For example the bizarre sheriff, played with B-movie zeal by the highly untalented nepotist Denise Crosby, prying into whassername's private affairs, just because whassername was freaked out by a kid screaming at the window. Well, it's either that or because the local sheriff is bored and likes to pick up the latest gossip. I didn't realize a sheriff's job description included being a psychologist to random strangers, even if the cop in question happens to be a woman.
Not that I immediately realized that Crosby was a female sheriff.
In fact, every time Sheriff Crosby appears, her character just gets weirder and dumber. One of her assistant cops is cast as a weird-looking slacker type from a Linklater indie flick. The whole film is like this: off. Tilted to the side. To the side of unnecessary silliness.
Rather silly is the nurse's reaction when she shoves her kids out of the spider-infested room: instead of following them outside, she STAYS inside, as some sort of pointless moment of self-sacrifice - as if having herself killed right in front of them will somehow be beneficial to her kids. She had plenty of time to leave the room, hence her decision was a laughably over-dramatic plot-device decision from the awful writers.
Speaking of dramatic, there is way too much family drama here, especially for a horror film. A MONSTER flick with characterization! Yeah, we sure needed that. We are constantly bored with her flashbacks and her pill addiction. I mean, it's not even a proper addiction like heroin or crack!
The spiders start wrecking havoc only ONE HOUR into the movie. So yes, you've been warned. By the time they finally go on the attack against humans, you will be so utterly bored you won't give a hoot. Or you might even be rooting for them.
Then again... the cat. Unforgivable. Spiders are definitely the bad guys here.
When asked how she bumped her head, the girl says: "I was looking for kitty-cat in the sticky snow with the dolls." Of course, if she had simply said "I was trying to find the missing cat in the huge-ass spider web that's covered the entire attic as well as all my dolls" then the plot would have gone forward, moving somewhere. Alas, kids get used as padding, as goofy plot-devices to stretch out a thin plot about a large spider invading a house. Because nobody ever believes them. And because they speak Nonsensese at the most inopportune moments. Well, I did say the writing was pitiful.
Why are the three of them allowed to remain in the house after the owner is found killed by something that might indicate a biological threat? No explanation there either.