I love video games. I love learning how to interact with the little worlds people have conjured up and crafted with love and computer magic. I open with that statement because people were offended when Roger Ebert said that video games aren't art. Honestly, I'm still not sure if video games are art or not, but Death Stranding is a game that *tries* to be art, but trips, constantly, much like Norman Reedus's character in Death Stranding. The term "video games" has the term "games" in it; naturally, they're meant to be fun. Death Stranding is not fun. In trying to be grand, the minute-to-minute gameplay is dry and dull as bleached bones. Death Stranding is annoying for many reasons, but perhaps chiefly is how it does not respect your time.
Hideo Kojima garnered a lot of praise for his work on the Metal Gear series, as well as a lot of sympathy for his falling out with Konami, publisher of MGS. I remember reading about the drama when it was transpiring and it looks like a large part of the friction between Kojima and Konami was Konami refusing to indulge Hideo Kojima. Kojima refers to himself as "God" in games like MGS:PW; his opinion of himself is annoyingly, terribly, and of course falsely high. Here's the rub, though: teams and teams of people assembled the Metal Gear Solid games. People who left Konami have made statements like Kojima is "not actually a writer." Think of it like Matt Groening and The Simpsons: Groening is often attributed to 100% of the success of the show, but he's only the creator. Many of the actual great episodes were written by scores of people like John Swartzwelder, and teams of people fleshed out and developed the cast of the show. Groening's direct involvement is thin.
Death Stranding is boring, terribly so. I've seen YT comments describe this game as "Fetch Quest: The Game," and I'm inclined to agree. Death Stranding layers systems on top of other systems, but the game never becomes fun: it becomes a gigantic list of menus. Micromanagement doesn't describe it, it's nano-management (nano being the prefix smaller than micro: if you didn't know that, huh, taught you something new today.)
An attempt to mix up the dull grind of making deliveries and navigating endless seas of lists with tiny white boxy font are encounters with "beached things," or BT's, as they're abbreviated. Now, ostensibly, these sound great on paper. Tense stealth sections where you must navigate a safe path between spooky ghosts. Even the name, "beached things," sounds cool. But after the second time, every encounter with the BT's becomes a chore. The BT's aren't cool or interesting looking; they're just black shapes hanging in the air, and, if one of them grabs you, you lose a lot of your cargo, are whirled about the map, to lazily outrun a slow-moving tar creature. It. Is. A. Grind.
Not only that, but the baby crying through the darn controller adds to the tedium. Human beings are programmed to react to the sound of a baby crying. It's part of our survival mechanism: babies crying pierces us worse than any alarm. So, while you're busy trying to deal with the BS systems that Kojima should have left on the cutting room floor, you also have to endure the sound of a baby shrieking through your controller's very loud, very gratingly poor speaker. Who thought this was a good idea?
Much of the plot is not dumb, not stupid, but *ridiculous.* For example, there are factions of men that live out in the wilderness called MULEs who will attack Norman Reedus's character for an opportunity to steal the cargo Reedus is trying to deliver. Why? Just to deliver themselves for, and get this: the rush of making the delivery. Yes, really. This raises so many questions. If it's the end of the world and porters are in high demand, wouldn't it be better for the MULEs to live close to cities, where they'd be venerated like Reedus's character instead of living alone out in the middle of nowhere? Would you really risk life and limb just to steal a parcel to make a delivery, which was already en route to being delivered? Would you really isolate yourself from the remains of civilization to live the life of an outlaw, but instead of being an outlaw (stealing, killing, forming a roving gang) you stole packages from lone travellers just to deliver the packages yourself? (Do you see now why I describe Kojima as self-indulgent? I don't know what to make of Konami, but Kojima really comes off as the type that needs a firm hand.)
Here's some criticisms I would expect could be leveled at this review:
"You have to give it time. It'll get good later." But, as a video game, shouldn't it be fun immediately?
"Shame on you for wanting immediacy so much. You're as self-indulgent as Kojima." Really? It's a video game: shouldn't I feel entertained if I'm paying (a lot of my hard-earned money) for entertainment? Plus, of course I'm willing to invest some time for it to "get good," but it's been hours: why can't I get the image of Hideo Kojima's troll face out of my head?
You know, *real* video games like Luigi's Mansion 3 are out, and Pokemon S&S are coming out next week...
Hideo Kojima garnered a lot of praise for his work on the Metal Gear series, as well as a lot of sympathy for his falling out with Konami, publisher of MGS. I remember reading about the drama when it was transpiring and it looks like a large part of the friction between Kojima and Konami was Konami refusing to indulge Hideo Kojima. Kojima refers to himself as "God" in games like MGS:PW; his opinion of himself is annoyingly, terribly, and of course falsely high. Here's the rub, though: teams and teams of people assembled the Metal Gear Solid games. People who left Konami have made statements like Kojima is "not actually a writer." Think of it like Matt Groening and The Simpsons: Groening is often attributed to 100% of the success of the show, but he's only the creator. Many of the actual great episodes were written by scores of people like John Swartzwelder, and teams of people fleshed out and developed the cast of the show. Groening's direct involvement is thin.
Death Stranding is boring, terribly so. I've seen YT comments describe this game as "Fetch Quest: The Game," and I'm inclined to agree. Death Stranding layers systems on top of other systems, but the game never becomes fun: it becomes a gigantic list of menus. Micromanagement doesn't describe it, it's nano-management (nano being the prefix smaller than micro: if you didn't know that, huh, taught you something new today.)
An attempt to mix up the dull grind of making deliveries and navigating endless seas of lists with tiny white boxy font are encounters with "beached things," or BT's, as they're abbreviated. Now, ostensibly, these sound great on paper. Tense stealth sections where you must navigate a safe path between spooky ghosts. Even the name, "beached things," sounds cool. But after the second time, every encounter with the BT's becomes a chore. The BT's aren't cool or interesting looking; they're just black shapes hanging in the air, and, if one of them grabs you, you lose a lot of your cargo, are whirled about the map, to lazily outrun a slow-moving tar creature. It. Is. A. Grind.
Not only that, but the baby crying through the darn controller adds to the tedium. Human beings are programmed to react to the sound of a baby crying. It's part of our survival mechanism: babies crying pierces us worse than any alarm. So, while you're busy trying to deal with the BS systems that Kojima should have left on the cutting room floor, you also have to endure the sound of a baby shrieking through your controller's very loud, very gratingly poor speaker. Who thought this was a good idea?
Much of the plot is not dumb, not stupid, but *ridiculous.* For example, there are factions of men that live out in the wilderness called MULEs who will attack Norman Reedus's character for an opportunity to steal the cargo Reedus is trying to deliver. Why? Just to deliver themselves for, and get this: the rush of making the delivery. Yes, really. This raises so many questions. If it's the end of the world and porters are in high demand, wouldn't it be better for the MULEs to live close to cities, where they'd be venerated like Reedus's character instead of living alone out in the middle of nowhere? Would you really risk life and limb just to steal a parcel to make a delivery, which was already en route to being delivered? Would you really isolate yourself from the remains of civilization to live the life of an outlaw, but instead of being an outlaw (stealing, killing, forming a roving gang) you stole packages from lone travellers just to deliver the packages yourself? (Do you see now why I describe Kojima as self-indulgent? I don't know what to make of Konami, but Kojima really comes off as the type that needs a firm hand.)
Here's some criticisms I would expect could be leveled at this review:
"You have to give it time. It'll get good later." But, as a video game, shouldn't it be fun immediately?
"Shame on you for wanting immediacy so much. You're as self-indulgent as Kojima." Really? It's a video game: shouldn't I feel entertained if I'm paying (a lot of my hard-earned money) for entertainment? Plus, of course I'm willing to invest some time for it to "get good," but it's been hours: why can't I get the image of Hideo Kojima's troll face out of my head?
You know, *real* video games like Luigi's Mansion 3 are out, and Pokemon S&S are coming out next week...