As far as lesbian movies go, this is one of the best I've seen, considering most are about sin or conversion therapy or just blatantly over-sexualized in a bad way. For the most part, I enjoyed this movie. The romantic scenes between Sasha and Anne when they were just getting to know each other were bittersweet while they lasted and left me dreaming for that teenage romance, awakening my inner hopeless romantic. The choice of how they developed their relationship was much more realistic than many modern romance movies in a refreshing way that drew me to root for the couple through the duration of the plot.
However, the character Clifton is where I stake my problems. His character is consistently confusing throughout the film and although I can see the direction the writers were trying to take with him, it came up flat and perplexing. At the beginning of the movie, the way we are led to believe he reacts to Anne's crush on Sasha sets him up to be the figurative villain of the movie, his motivation clearly laying in his love for Anne. As we delve further into the movie, the somewhat disturbing and unexpected reality of the event unfolds. We are shown, in a rather uncomfortable scene that I wish I had not laid eyes upon, that Clifton had sex with Anne but she then pushed him away and told him that Sasha was a girl. This pulled me out of the movie, considerably. Compared to the more realistic take the film had shown beforehand, this was a harsh contrast. As Anne, who we are lead to believe is a very brash and "just say it" kind of girl, is entirely submissive when he lays down his advances.
Anne's out of character reaction sort of shook up my viewing experience as a whole. I think the writers wanted to fuel some sort of motivation for 'revenge' and also reconciliation within Clifton. Having him have sex with her, and in his foolish mind, having him believe she was leading him on caused discourse in Sasha and Anne's relationship. However, we see that once he realises what he did wrong he has a change of face.
There are a few issues I have with this: One, Clifton's choice to ask Sasha out made a very little impact on the plot as ultimately it was Sasha's fear of being outed that drove a wedge in their relationship (resulting in her turning to go on a date with Clifton, that Anne never finds out about on screen. Even what he says to her during that date makes little to no impact on the story.).Two, after realising that he practically raped Anne, we see by the end of the film that he has clearly changed his ways in his own character development, but we don't actually see any of this development. He never apologises for his actions. I will, however, say that this wasn't entirely pointless, if not for this plotline Anne would never have hit Clifton and her mother would never have hit her and she wouldn't have ended up staying at Sasha's house.
There is one creative aspect I simply have to comment on before this review is finished. Throughout the film, the director took a very unique (or at least I think unique) approach to show us what was going on. We would see the beginning and end of a particular scene or moment and would be left to assume what had happened. This, at first, seems like a case of poor writing or simply laziness. Alas, as we continue through the timeline of the film we are shown bits of these scenes one by one until it fills in the missing gaps. Where I have seen a lot of movies show memories as we are seeing them the second or third time, this choice to reveal each event slowly kept me on my seat and engaged me in the movie universe. As my pessimism says, this was probably a device used to male sure viewers watched the whole way through, I like to ignore that and believe that this was the vision of the project. Creating a lust for not only a happy ending, but for every last morsel of information as it was revealed to us slowly when needed be.
Before I conclude I'd like to talk about the conclusion. The end of the movie is somewhat of a mystery for me. I still am not sure why they felt the need to incorporate that lady in the movie for that final scene where she gets a HIV test. Most of the conflict in the film itself was left entirely unresolved. We never know what happens to Sasha, if she ever admits to being a lesbian. We never know if Anne forgives Clifton, or if he even apologises. But, despite the slightly annoyed feeling we all get when the couple doesn't get together at the end of a film, I think that's okay.
That leads me to my last comment. I think that it's okay how they left it. Personally, I think the intent with this film wasn't to create a perfect love story or a dramatic and suspenseful experience, but rather to give a realistic and raw version of a Hollywood film. It definitely was not 100% successful, as I've brought up my grievances with the realism towards the middle of the story. But, First Girl I Loved told the story of normal people. It told the story where we don't get the happy ending, as it's namesake, it told the story of girls first love. Bittersweet and sad and happy and everything in between. Because, in the real world, Sasha isn't brave enough to come out to the world quite yet. In the real world, there isn't a happily ever after. And that's what I like about this movie. As much as it frustrates me, it also makes me happy. There it is, it really is all up to perception.
However, the character Clifton is where I stake my problems. His character is consistently confusing throughout the film and although I can see the direction the writers were trying to take with him, it came up flat and perplexing. At the beginning of the movie, the way we are led to believe he reacts to Anne's crush on Sasha sets him up to be the figurative villain of the movie, his motivation clearly laying in his love for Anne. As we delve further into the movie, the somewhat disturbing and unexpected reality of the event unfolds. We are shown, in a rather uncomfortable scene that I wish I had not laid eyes upon, that Clifton had sex with Anne but she then pushed him away and told him that Sasha was a girl. This pulled me out of the movie, considerably. Compared to the more realistic take the film had shown beforehand, this was a harsh contrast. As Anne, who we are lead to believe is a very brash and "just say it" kind of girl, is entirely submissive when he lays down his advances.
Anne's out of character reaction sort of shook up my viewing experience as a whole. I think the writers wanted to fuel some sort of motivation for 'revenge' and also reconciliation within Clifton. Having him have sex with her, and in his foolish mind, having him believe she was leading him on caused discourse in Sasha and Anne's relationship. However, we see that once he realises what he did wrong he has a change of face.
There are a few issues I have with this: One, Clifton's choice to ask Sasha out made a very little impact on the plot as ultimately it was Sasha's fear of being outed that drove a wedge in their relationship (resulting in her turning to go on a date with Clifton, that Anne never finds out about on screen. Even what he says to her during that date makes little to no impact on the story.).Two, after realising that he practically raped Anne, we see by the end of the film that he has clearly changed his ways in his own character development, but we don't actually see any of this development. He never apologises for his actions. I will, however, say that this wasn't entirely pointless, if not for this plotline Anne would never have hit Clifton and her mother would never have hit her and she wouldn't have ended up staying at Sasha's house.
There is one creative aspect I simply have to comment on before this review is finished. Throughout the film, the director took a very unique (or at least I think unique) approach to show us what was going on. We would see the beginning and end of a particular scene or moment and would be left to assume what had happened. This, at first, seems like a case of poor writing or simply laziness. Alas, as we continue through the timeline of the film we are shown bits of these scenes one by one until it fills in the missing gaps. Where I have seen a lot of movies show memories as we are seeing them the second or third time, this choice to reveal each event slowly kept me on my seat and engaged me in the movie universe. As my pessimism says, this was probably a device used to male sure viewers watched the whole way through, I like to ignore that and believe that this was the vision of the project. Creating a lust for not only a happy ending, but for every last morsel of information as it was revealed to us slowly when needed be.
Before I conclude I'd like to talk about the conclusion. The end of the movie is somewhat of a mystery for me. I still am not sure why they felt the need to incorporate that lady in the movie for that final scene where she gets a HIV test. Most of the conflict in the film itself was left entirely unresolved. We never know what happens to Sasha, if she ever admits to being a lesbian. We never know if Anne forgives Clifton, or if he even apologises. But, despite the slightly annoyed feeling we all get when the couple doesn't get together at the end of a film, I think that's okay.
That leads me to my last comment. I think that it's okay how they left it. Personally, I think the intent with this film wasn't to create a perfect love story or a dramatic and suspenseful experience, but rather to give a realistic and raw version of a Hollywood film. It definitely was not 100% successful, as I've brought up my grievances with the realism towards the middle of the story. But, First Girl I Loved told the story of normal people. It told the story where we don't get the happy ending, as it's namesake, it told the story of girls first love. Bittersweet and sad and happy and everything in between. Because, in the real world, Sasha isn't brave enough to come out to the world quite yet. In the real world, there isn't a happily ever after. And that's what I like about this movie. As much as it frustrates me, it also makes me happy. There it is, it really is all up to perception.