Eaten Alive (1976)
4/10
Lots of interesting elements don't amount to much
5 July 2016
Warning: Spoilers
Tobe Hooper's cheapo follow-up to The Texas Chain Saw Massacre is more like a grindhouse sleaze flick than a proper horror film, featuring as it does tons of gratuitous nudity, sleazy and grim characters. Hooper's greatest flaw is squandering the not inconsiderable talents of a game exploitation cast – featuring no less than six genre talents and one proper "star" – on what is a very boring and very derivative psycho-killer flick which very obviously models itself on PSYCHO. Filmed on the cheap, on pretty much a single set, this doesn't have a lot to recommend it, featuring as it does the looney Judd who feeds the guests at his hotel to a fake-looking crocodile in the lake underneath it (!). Unlike Texas, Hooper is happy to let the blood run free here, showcasing a series of graphic murders as Judd dispatches various unfortunate folk with his wicked-looking scythe.

Although the run-time is comparatively short, there is tons of needless padding, including a game of pool in the local bar which serves no purpose whatsoever, lots of pretty young girls stripping off and bathing/going to bed and most annoyingly, tons of scenes of Judd wandering around muttering to himself. Brand is ugly and haggard as the psycho, very convincing but his wild cackling does get a bit much after a while and the all-too-obvious twist at the end doesn't come soon enough.

Marilyn Burns returns from Texas and goes through the gruelling scream queen ritual again, getting beaten, humiliated, bloodied, and tied to the bed for most of the movie. Still, from what I see I do think she's a good actress and certainly an attractive one. Not, however, as attractive as Morticia from the devilishly good '60s TV series THE ADDAMS FAMILY, and guest-starring here is Carolyn Jones, who played Morticia. Sadly, Jones has aged incredibly, and being only in her late '40s she is unrecognisable from the Gothic glamour queen she once played; in fact it is very sad seeing her like this (surely her given date of birth – 1929 – must be incorrect). Thankfully she is on the screen for only a short time.

Stuart Whitman and Mel Ferrer, a couple of old-timers fallen on hard times, play the sheriff and a dying father respectively. Whitman has little more to do than look macho with a badge, but Ferrer has a briefer yet meatier role and I always get a kick out of seeing him on film. Also on hand is the kooky William Finley from PHANTOM OF THE PARADISE; although he makes up the numbers as a victim, he's also a bit of a psycho himself and starts barking like a dog in one scene! Strangely enough the film's most memorable character is that of the supporting perv Buck, as played by future Freddy Krueger Robert Englund. Englund is certainly the best thing in the film, playing one of the dumbest, sleaziest dirtbags I've ever seen, and it doesn't surprise me that he went on to stardom as a child-molesting zombie killer on the strength of his performance here. All in all a quirky movie, but also a boring one that doesn't stand up to repeat viewing.
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