Review of Survivor

Survivor (I) (2014)
Hilarious scientifically illiterate drivel.
9 May 2016
Warning: Spoilers
So apparently the Earth drifts out of its orbit for some reason and to fix this the human race decides to smash sub atomic particles together in particle accelerators despite the fact this would do absolutely nothing to solve the problem. Then to make matters worse for some other random reason these particle accelerators create mini black holes which proceed to heat up the Earth and boil off its oceans. This of course ignores the fact that said black holes would in fact rapidly descent to the Earth's core and begin eating it from the inside.

Anyway what this film mostly consists of is a girl running, jumping and climbing a lot. At one point she even has a magic quiver of arrows which, despite the fact you can clearly see it has only one arrow in it, keeps producing new ones until she's killed all her enemies before finally running out. She also does a lot of posing on high rocky outcrops despite the fact she's trying to avoid the locals.

Oh and Kevin Sorbo lies at the bottom of a cliff with a broken leg for two days in a desert yet appears not to be in any need of food or water. He really is Hercules it would appear.

I notice this was funded through kickstarter so that old maxim of "a fool and his money are soon parted" seems as true today as ever. Probably more so if this nonsense is anything to go by.
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