'Fort Tilden' is the tale of a ten-mile road trip by a couple of bored Brooklyn brats, who head for the beach to hook up with a pair of charmless dudes. Their airhead odyssey comprises only lame exchanges and minor fiascoes involving various acquaintances and strangers, so the big adventure soon turns into a plodding marathon by bicycle, cab and foot. The 'heroines' are portrayed as spineless selfish simpletons, and although the film is clearly intended to be a comedy, it's short on laughs, wit or interest.
The actresses struggle gamely with the pedestrian material, but their characters' whiny griping and fecklessness leaves one hoping a truck will squash them into roadkill at every intersection. When they finally meet their romantic prospects on a gray windswept seashore, the encounter is just another flaccid flop in a series of screw-ups.
The actresses struggle gamely with the pedestrian material, but their characters' whiny griping and fecklessness leaves one hoping a truck will squash them into roadkill at every intersection. When they finally meet their romantic prospects on a gray windswept seashore, the encounter is just another flaccid flop in a series of screw-ups.