4/10
How to Train a Pipsqueak Barbarian
23 September 2013
An evident homage to role playing games and the whole fantasy in general, the computer animated feature "Ronal the Barbarian" falters on various fields - from the story department right on to the graphics, which at times look like taken from an online kids flick (cheap, rough and passable at best). Animations unfortunately aren't crude in inspired "South Park" fashion, but instead are hampered by a poor choice in aesthetic feel, especially when glancing on the shimmering faces of our ill-crafted hero.

Ronal comes from a clan of barbaric super-beings, descendants of the fierce warrior Crom, a heroic glorified figure, who once conquered the purest evil from Metalonia. His muscle-bulging tribe inherited the strength of their great ancestor by drinking his blood, thus themselves gaining the traits of invincibility. Ronal however is himself a weakling, unable to properly yielding a sword, thus a laughing stock and subject of much ridicule. However during a surprise attack - caused in part by Ronal's physical inability to sound an alarm - the entire tribe, save for Ronal, is captured by the evil forces of Lord Volcazar, hellbent on world domination and the rule of darkness. Only one weapon can pierce the armour of Lord Volcazar - the sword of Crom, thus reluctantly forcing the young feeble lad on an ill-advised quest. On his way he is joined by a rag tag of allies, such as a chubby foul-mouthed, dry-humping bard Aliberth, a deadly shield maid, who searches for someone capable of defeating her (thus earning her hand in marriage) Zandra and a narcissistic, dandelion elf Elric.

Ronal himself has an unflinching feel of repetitiveness, too close to comfort to the character of Hiccup from the "How to Train a Dragon" movie, as if somewhat of an expansion of his traits and frailties, only set in an adult-friendly environment. Despite a markedly different plot the general overview is pretty much identical, just with the PG rating thrown out the window, all for the benefit of sado-maso gadgets and some on-screen fatalities. Nonetheless the biggest fault lies with the story itself (albeit the unfocused animatics are a disruptive presence throughout), which attempts to infuse laughter through a stock of lewd jokes, mostly falling pretty flat on the face. Probably the biggest success is the character of Elric with his exaggerated elven traits, so sweetly pirouetting during a bloody fight. The rest of the protagonists fall flat and tire out the material potential pretty fast, thus quickly resorting to crude jokes for salvation (which for the most part don't work).

That said a lot of jokes could have just been lost in translation, dubbed out with passable English dialogues in place of the potentially superior Danish language version. Unfortunately the truth of the matter will never be known.
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