5/10
ISLAND OF DEATH {Edited Version} (Nico Mastorakis, 1975) **
25 October 2011
Warning: Spoilers
I only became aware of this when it was mentioned as one of the more infamous "Video Nasties" and I must say that I acquired it somewhat half-heartedly, so much so that I did not realize at the time it was a censored edition (cut by about 4 minutes)! Anyway, this could well be re-titled LAST ISLAND ON THE LEFT but, at the very least, it puts a spin on the usual formula by making the villains ostensibly on a cleansing killing spree; incidentally, it also turns on its head the oft-used premise of innocent victims at the mercy of the weird locals of a remote community – which was the case with, say, WHO CAN KILL A CHILD? (1976), a film that was actually also released in some circles as ISLAND OF DEATH! However, hypocritically, the protagonists here are themselves guilty of perversion: they pass themselves off as husband and wife, but are actually brother and sister; besides, when the girl rejects the man's advances, he relieves his craving by raping a goat!!

Ironically, another lewd incident – making love in a public telephone box and calling their mother on the phone to listen in on them! – puts a black detective (he is supposed to hail from Britain, but the local Police force must have felt compelled to call on one of Shaft's 'bruthas' for the task!) on their trail…except that he proves inefficient, not only because he gives up the chase after just one attempt but he even allows his quarries to turn the tables on him by tying a rope around his neck and throwing him off the side of his own chartered plane! Stupidly, then, they phone the company responsible to come pick up the aircraft, since when the local law enforcers – alerted by an inquisitive crime novelist – eventually close in, they could have used it themselves to get away! I am not sure whether the director intended us to root for the perpetrators of these heinous crimes but, the man in particular, is just too despicable; he also turns out to be the more deranged, as his sister occasionally tries to dissuade him from carrying on with the 'mission' but he throws a fit every time she does and the latter she sheepishly acquiesces!

Among their 'sinful' victims are: a French lothario engaged in painting a local chapel (after the girl gives herself to him, they literally nail him to the ground and when, Christ-like, he asks for a drink, they pour a pail full of paint down his throat!); a couple of gays who had flamboyantly celebrated their wedding ceremony (one escapes their clutches initially, leading to a chase along ultra-narrow streets of the town only to have him gutted with a sword when cornered, and the other is forced to suck the barrel of a pistol which is then fired and his brains splattered all over the walls!); a couple of hippie buskers (complete with hilarious 'cool' mannerisms who unwisely take the opportunity of the man's absence to go fishing to burst in their house and rape the girl while she is having a bath – but he returns in time to shoot a harpoon into one's chest and shove the other's face in the toilet bowl!); a lesbian/junkie barmaid (again, first she is allowed to indulge in one vice and then made to overdose on her other habit but, to complete the task, she has her face burned); an ageing nymphomaniac who seduces the man but when she proves too enthusiastic, he repeatedly slaps her around and bashes her head on the floor and, for the coup de grace, beheads her with a bulldozer!); and even the proprietor of the place where they are staying (who, as far as I can tell, her only crime is to take her showers with the door open but, when the villain gives chase, still ends up with a sickle implanted through a door and right into the back of her head!).

As is to be expected with this type of fare, the protagonists eventually encounter someone who is even more vicious than they are, in the form of a mute shepherd who ostensibly gives them shelter – only to rape the girl (as usual with his pants on!) and bury the man in a lime-pit, after having (I kid you not!) noisily farted in his face. The ultimate irony is that the girl apparently likes the shepherd's rough treatment and prefers his company to her brother's, whose recklessness she blames for their current predicament, and the man dies scalded by the acidic lime when it becomes wet in a downpour. Incidentally, the murdering couple constantly take photos of their various crimes (with the camera-click repeatedly adopted throughout as a transition) and even keep a diary of their would-be righteous exploits. Besides, the shepherd had actually appeared to the girl in her dreams and, though we only ever get a distorted view of his leering face, she says he does to the two of them what actually comes to pass!

As I said, the idea of violently punishing perversion is not bad in itself – in fact, it was a staple of the Giallo subgenre – but the amateurish handling and virtually uninterrupted nastiness kills any notion of supplying either audience identification or an objective viewpoint! The sole redeeming feature here, apart from the attractive Mediterranean location, are the clutter of acoustic songs on the soundtrack which basically comment upon the unfolding action (including yells of "Get the sword and kill 'em all"!).
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