greatrusty911 Review of Ready

Ready (2011)

Be "READY" with a asprin!!!

[3/10 · 6 June 2011]

I loved Wanted for what it was - A refreshing change from the typical Bollywood drama and it had one of the most hilarious villains ever. Then came Dabbang which broke all possible records and ended up winning a National Award, God alone knows for what. It definitely took the credibility of the National Awards down the crapper. But I must say that both Akshay Kumar and Salman Khan are leaving no stone unturned in proving it to the world that the IQ of an average Indian Movie goer is most definitely less than that of a donkey(no offense Mr. Donkey). But its like you just hang a damn carrot in front of that ass and it follows irrespective of the fact that hes never gonna get to eat it. Similarly these so called superstars of our industry have found the perfect recipe for a carrot so tempting that we like donkeys(again no offense Mr. Donkey) flock towards the multiplexes and shell out our hard earned money just like that. But all things said and done there are certain things that neither me nor the world were "READY" for -

• The enormity of the crap that was thrown at my face in the name of entertainment...

• The very painful 3 hrs of expressionless antics which Salman so proudly calls Acting...

• Asin with an inch thick layer of makeup..

• Salman shaking the unmentionables with his hands deep down in his pockets to the tune of Dhinka Chika and a bunch of school kids following in the backdrop..Yeah definitely Being Human!!!

• A series of not so funny guest appearances by superstars which by the way is totally irrelevant to the story... wait a minute there was no story... sorry my bad!!!

• The secret that the Indians have taken over Thailand and that the Thai race is extinct...

• A couple dozen very noisy characters related to each other in such complexity that only Ekta Kapoor can figure out who's who...

• Salman Khan peeing on a haystack to announce the pee break which by the way is the interval..Yeah thats what we want the people to be doing in the name of Hero-Worship!!! Act responsible Mr.Salman...

• A couple of negative characters named after salmans heroic flops Veer and Yuvraaj

• The climax where one of the goons gets his ass kicked with a flower...yes u read it rite, with a flower...

• And finally, Salman's arrogance in finding out how little can he get away with...

I rest my case!!!

AS I SEE IT please don't go into the movie expecting sense. Or sensibility.And especially if you don't Hero-worship Salman be "READY" with an asprin!!!