Actually it's a NEGATIVE 9/10 stars.
22 November 2009
I loved House of 1000 corpses. I really enjoyed The Devil's Rejects. Halloween... unnggg well... you know. As for this "movie"... It's basically unwatchable to anyone who has reached puberty... at least mentally. It never, ever fails to amaze me that an adult can watch something this childish and swoon the entire time over how brilliant it is. Just remake "Animaniacs", back it up with a pseudo "Rocky Horror Picture Show" soundtrack, draw lots of boobs and be sure to use the "F-word" every 30 seconds. Voila! Now it's not a sugar coated pile of poo made to sit your kids in front of to keep then from breaking stuff ... It's a masterpiece! Talk about irritating. The voices, sound effects and everything else is like a Hanna Barberra cartoon on crack. Complete with kazoos, crashes, whistles and fast paced, zippy cartoon overacting through 100 percent of this "movie". The soundtrack is the cheesiest rock opera version of "Rent" that I have ever heard on my life. Shreri Moon Zombie's super high pitched voice did fit in perfectly though. Like listening to a metal garden rake being scrapped across cement while suffering from a seriously bad hangover. Enough to induce vomiting and possibly even suicide. I also thought it was really classy how Rob found a way to plug every single product that he has ever produced... but what else could one do with "Yogi Bear on Crystal Meth" but turn it into one big commercial for (buurp... ugh COUGH... sorry, I just threw up in my mouth a little bit) officially licensed Rob Zombie Merchandise ©.

Good god was this movie awful. I loathed it. As I write this review I can hear the accordions, bicycle horns, whistles and crashes mixed in with "classic rock" like "Mr. Roboto" and "Everybody's workin' for the weekend" coming from the next room. Thank god my gun is in the shop.

If you're the kind of person who can sit through an hour and a half of Deputy Dog or Tiny Toons and be wowed by the pretty colors and funny sound effects then you will just love this. I am positive that $9,999,990 of the $10,000,000 budget for this film went into researching ways to make it EVEN more dumbed down. I can see ol' R.Z. now... "Alright, we need to put even more F-words in because people are starting to loose interest". "MORE COWBELL I SAID!" So in the end, this IS NOT, NEVER WAS, AND NEVER WILL BE an adult cartoon. It is simply a Rob Zombie themed version of Tiny Toons with lots of F-Words and boobs thrown in to convince "adults" that their entertainment isn't on the same level as a third grader. I lost interest in these type of cartoons at about the same time I started growing hair on my pubes.

After really, really looking hard for some redeeming quality here, I did find one good thing about "El Superbeasto". The animators did a great job of staying in the lines. Great job guys! I would totally hang any of the stills from this movie on my fridge... That is if I didn't hate this movie.

This was just plain embarrassing... and nauseating. I think that I would rather sit through my grandparent's remake of "2 girls, 1 cup" than to to sit through this again. Yes, it really is that bad... to say the very least.
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