Review of Warbirds

Warbirds (2008 TV Movie)
1/10
This movie should start out with a suicide warning...
8 August 2009
Warning: Spoilers
I don't know where to start. Some sick part of me enjoys the self-torture of the Sci-Fi/SyFy Originals, but after this one, I don't know how long I can hold on. I have limited knowledge of WW2 (I sucked in history), but even I knew this stuff was made-up! The Japanese guys had an American truck, and somehow the American women knew how to fly Japanese planes? Come on. And somehow they were going to fix their big broken planes with junk from a mostly abandoned Japanese camp ripped apart by blue pterodactyls? To add insult to injury, I don't care how big the dino is... it can't fly as fast as a plane. While watching the movie, I didn't know the planes topped out at 300mph, but I knew it had to be faster than any flying animal! The worst insult to my intelligence was the "fact" that the pterodactyls were fearless in ripping through planes (literally), which had loud engines, whirling sharp propellers, and of course someone in them shooting giant bullets at the monsters... and yet the dinos were terrified at the sight of a torch. A TORCH. Come on.

I have literally read stories written by children in grade school with better and more well-planned plots than this. This Sci-Fi Original took its usual crap writing, crap acting, crap effects, and gigantic plot holes and somehow managed to make a mediocre movie even worse than usual. While watching this, I had the same feeling I get when I'm getting a cavity filled, thinking "God, how much longer is this going to go on?!" There is absolutely nothing redeemable about this movie, not one thing. There isn't any humor, any effect worth mentioning, nothing. It's completely worthless. If you see it on your schedule or think about renting it, do yourself a HUGE favor and just pass it by.
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