Against the Dark (2009 Video)
1/10
Things I learned watching this film.
13 July 2009
Warning: Spoilers
1. Katanas are actually scimitars.

2. Ex-military folks don't speak much.

3. Ex-military folks must wear black leather when "hunting", and the gals must wear high-heeled boots.

4. People who survive virus-induced holocausts are either immune or not depending on the whim of the director.

5. People who survive virus-induced holocausts have no real need of a method of self-defense like, say, a gun.

6. Stock footage of planes flying over deserts and oceans are believable for use during depictions of bombing runs.

7. All sword masters don't really do much swinging or moving. They just walk everywhere.

8. This is the fulfillment of Seagal's contract with Satan for his stardom.

9. There are more clichés in Hollywood then I realize.

10. You can survive a bombing run of planes by driving in an old pick up truck, which you don't have to see on screen to know they survived.

11. Vampires look and act a lot like zombies, and then spontaneously evolve for no apparent reason.

12. Seagal has the acting versatility of an oak tree.

13. There was a voice over credit for Seagal's character for no reason I can fathom.

This movie is just bad, bad, bad. The scripting, acting, technical aspects, and artistic values of this pickle are all bad. The only saving grace is Midwinter, who does surprisingly well with his time on camera, both acting and action wise. If you are a fan of him, pick this film up. Otherwise, don't bother. You have been warned.
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