Get Smart: Hello, Columbus - Goodbye, America (1970)
Season 5, Episode 24
6/10
Man with My Face
12 February 2008
Warning: Spoilers
I sense the off the wall sensibility of Johnny Carson writer Pat McCormick in this script. The use of Billy Barty as a KAOS agent named Gemini (because he stands on the shoulders of another dwarf and is in reality TWO men) is inspired. The story idea that lawyers have discovered America still belongs to the relatives of Christopher Columbus, Gino Columbus (Vito Scotti) is also wonderfully oddball. And the three girls who accompany Columbus--Nina, Pinta and (darn, I forget her name!) are all very attractive and sadly, unbilled.

Max is to guard Columbus until he can sign the deed to America to the United States, only he and Max are taken prisoner by Victor Borgia (Oscar Beregi making his third appearance as a KAOS killer--the first two were in "Tequilla Mockingbird" and "I'm Only Human") and when Columbus refuses to sign the deed over to KAOS, Borgia tries to drown them until Max is able to find a plug and escape.

But then the story takes an odd and illogical turn as the Chief insists Max go back disguised as Columbus and act as a decoy while they get the real Columbus to sign the papers. Despite the fact Borgia and his henchmen have seen both Max and Columbus, they fall for the "disguise" which consists of a mustache and clothes identical to Columbus, along with a atrocious stereotypical Italian accent. They didn't even use the "spray on plastic surgery" they used earlier in the series. It just makes no sense and brings the whole episode down. There also appears to be the start of some sort of anti-Pittsburgh runner (there's another one like it in the next episode) but the series didn't last long enough to develop that joke if it was going anywhere. Lost in the shuffle, Vitto Scotti actually does a nice job as the flamboyant Columbus, a far cry from the Professor character he did in the pilot episode of "Get Smart".
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