futuramafanfry Review of The Rockville Slayer

The Rockville Slayer (2004)

Can't be spoiled because the story is unintelligible

[1/10 · 7 April 2007]

Someone below said that this film insults real rubbish. That line is funnier & more interesting than anything that appears on screen in this unending and unendurable "movie." There is a lot of people on screen coming and going and saying stuff but no one does or says anything interesting and you never even know who the hero is supposed to be until the end of the movie when there are only two characters left on screen. I guess that's the writer/director's way of telling you who you were supposed to be rooting for all along. I could tell you everything that happens from start to finish (murder, red herrings, late-entering characters trying to add some twists, and a limp cop who would be better cast as Ichabod Crane instead of a policeman) and it couldn't spoil the story for you because you could never enjoy it in the first place. I don't think any of the actors who's name you might recognize have done a major film since this one. Perhaps Rockville slayed their careers. The actors you've never heard of before you will never hear from again. The shame of it all is that it looks like they threw a lot of money on the screen, production values are high. The problems are many: bad direction, bad self indulgent impenetrable story, bad acting, poor sound, and a very bad quality DVD release.