3/10
Even Sean Connery cant save this mess
30 August 2006
Warning: Spoilers
I am a huge Bond fan and Sean Connery is also my favourite Bond. Now when I first saw this film I was much younger and probably didn't notice most of it's faults (because it had Sean Connery, it must be good) But now I've watched it a 3rd time, I now realise Never Say Never Again is probably one of the worst films I've ever seen. I couldn't possibly watch it in one sitting as I'd be on the brink of suicide by the final scene.

Yes, there are some highlights, the opening sequence is exciting but it is ruined by the horrendous theme tune that's played over the top of it. There is also an abundance of good dialogue (Fatima: Oh, I got you all wet; Bond: Yes, but my martini's still dry) and some interesting locations but they are sadly, wasted. Bond visits two of the most beautiful locations in the world, The Bahamas and the French Riviera and yet we see about 60 seconds of them on-screen before he's shipped off to somewhere else.

For most of the film there is hardly any reference to the actual plot (the stolen nuclear devices) at all, it seems as if Bond treats his 'mission' as a holiday where he can bed as many women as possible (4 on this occasion). The action sequences are incredibly boring and predicable, and the underwater shots lack any imagination or flair. Its hard to believe that this was directed by Irvin Kershner, who was responsible for the superb 'Empire Strikes Back'.

As for the characters, if you can call them that, they are probably the most boring and 1-dimensional of any bond film. The villain is almost non-existent, Kim Basinger is the most useless Bond girl to date (including Mary goodnight) and serves no purpose in the story at all. The (attempt at a) femme fatale, Fatima Blush is also truly dire. An awful character played by an equally awful actress, the adolescent producers obviously think they can make her 'sexy' by having her keep snakes in her car, heroin needles in her garter, and have her prance about in leather trousers and nurse's outfits whilst cackling like an old hag.

NSNA looks terribly dated, and it is only 23 years old. The set pieces are poorly-thought out and look cheap (probably because most of the films budget was spent on getting Connery back) The majority of the script is dull and clichéd and the entire film looks like it was edited in about 5 minutes. And when the film finally reaches a climax, it refuses to end. There is still about another 20 minutes of tedium before it slowly comes to a halt. An incredibly boring and pointless film, even the worst movies in the official series (golden gun and die another day) are more entertaining than this. It's no surprise Sean Connery refuses to watch the Bond films, this wasn't exactly a high-point in his career.
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