4/10
Aye, It's Rough Sailing!
30 June 2006
Basically the story is about little Jimmy, a boy who has no interest in anything but pirates, finding a bottle with a genie in it, and accidentally wishing he were part of Blackbeard's pirate ship. So the genie makes the wish, and little Jimmy goes back to the late 1500's for what should have been rollicking, fun pirate adventure but turns out instead to be less interesting than any adventure on the Love Boat on a bad day. What else happens: little Jimmy meets a Dutch girl with no accent(Susan Gordon, the director's daughter), argues with the genie over some story about how the genie must be thrown back in the same spot where found otherwise Jimmy will take his spot in the bottle, and accidentally leaves bubblegum in the kitchen for the cook to use in a stew. These were the film's highlights(no lie!). Charles Herbert, the child actor from The Fly and Thirteen Ghosts, does an adequate job as Jimmy. He was a very natural child actor with some obvious talent. Susan Gordon is cute if nothing else, and the rest of the cast is, well, adequate at best. Murvyn Vye is actually pretty decent as Blackbeard and Joe Turkel as the genie is also likewise. Paul Guilfoyle as Snipe - the lone pirate with any compassion for the two children - is the only actor; however, that even tries to add any depth to his character and performance. The rest, although not bad, are one-dimensional stereotypes of characters we've seen again and again. The biggest problem with this film is the direction and script. In a film that could and should have created some wonderful scenes for children, The Boy and the Pirates would be lucky to keep even a row boat afloat. Director and screenwriter Bert I. Gordon does a lackluster job bringing this story to the screen. The script has too many non-conventional conventions(once you see it you might know what I am trying to say here). The characters don't have any depth, and the comedy isn't all that funny. That notwithstanding, The Boy and the Pirates has some heart - if only it had a little more blood to give it more life!
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