1/10
Wow! What A Load Of Steaming Crud!
20 March 2006
What starts as a cheap Misery rip-off soon deteriorates into a pointless and slow-moving telemovie with teenage tearaways jumping out of cupboards.

After Alex McArthur is kidnapped and presented with pickled appendages by insane sisters Vanessa and Ann, Alex returns home to search for the retina-challenged incestuous spawn of Vanessa. With her troubled, spotty son causing raccoon-torturing incidents, Alex becomes a little too involved in a twisted family album. (What we have written here would imply a far greater film than the one that we actually viewed) Despite this, one really has to give credit to the wardrobe department on this one, making a 2001 production really have that eighties look about it. Laura Esterman's beautiful wig-work is also a point of interest for water-cooler discussion. (Can't even figure out why it was appropriate for her to be wearing a wig) If it's confusing and pointless drivel you're after, then look no further than Suspended Animation - aka the more generically-titled Mayhem. Don't expect scares or entertainment from this film, rather confusion caused by the fact that you are 38 minutes into the film with no end in sight.
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