Review of The Private Eyes

6/10
Uneven But Not a Complete Waste of Time
1 November 2002
After starring in the lackluster THE PRIZE FIGHTER, Tim Conway and Don Knotts teamed up again for THE PRIVATE EYES. Once again, Conway co-wrote the screenplay. The result is no masterpiece, but it is considerably superior to their previous film. For one thing, this film avoids the previous film's forced sentimentality, focusing exclusively on laughs and thrills. Another bonus is a consistently strong supporting cast; THE PRIZE FIGHTER had some ho-hum players, particularly Robin Clarke's dull villain. Particularly standing out in THE PRIVATE EYES are Trisha Noble as the sultry, quirky heiress whom detectives Conway and Knotts try to protect and Bernard Fox as the deranged butler Justin who goes berserk at the mention of the word "Murder."

THE PRIVATE EYES is a throwback to all those old haunted house comedies like Abbott and Costello's HOLD THAT GHOST in which the comic protagonist[s] endures numerous scares while trying to figure out the mysterious goings-on. The Biltmore House and Gardens in Asheville, North Carolina, where the film was made is an appropriate Gothic setting for the chills that Conway and Knotts experience. Peter Matz provides a lively score that conveys eeriness and mystery in a sprightly manner, appropriate for a horror comedy.

Unfortunately, the horrors per se- bodies turning up and then disappearing, a masked figure stalking the mansion, etc.- are cliched and the humor is inconsistent. There are some genuine laughs, such as when Knotts explains how the heiress's parents were killed and Conway, in his enthusiasm to figure out what clues the explanation could reveal, proceeds to perform the same actions the murderer did, nearly killing Knotts in the process. But THE PRIVATE EYES is also saddled with embarrassingly childish jokes (at one point, Knotts, Conway, and Fox do the old "walk this way" routine) and repetitive gags that quickly lose steam. The final gag ending is too predictable to be funny.

But for the most part, the stars shine even with substandard material. As the submissive partner, Conway projects a dimness that is both likably earnest and humorously deadpan. Knotts as the take-charge partner is reminiscent of his Barney Fife characterization, conveying an air of cockiness that is constantly punctured by his ineptitude and cowardice. With less gifted comedians, THE PRIVATE EYES would be very rough sledding.

For all its faults, it's difficult to dislike THE PRIVATE EYES. The film never pretends to be anything more than an old-fashioned horror comedy and Conway and Knotts clown around with no misconceptions of profundity. THE PRIVATE EYES is not essential viewing, but it's a pleasant time killer for a rainy day.
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