Review of Cry, Onion

Cry, Onion (1975)
Totally insane spaghetti western - I loved it!
18 September 2003
Unbelievable! Where to start with this one? Well, let's start with the casting. You would think Enzo G. Castellari would have cast Terence Hill (or even Bud Spencer) in this slapstick western - after all, those are the two actors you usually think of in this particular vein. But action superstar FRANCO NERO?!? Not only that, giving him a Donald Sutherland perm? The English dubbers take it even further by giving Nero a voice that sounds like a senile Jimmy Stewart. Still, Nero is clearly game for such an atypical part, throwing himself into all the slapstick, and he's clearly having fun. He's fun to watch as a result, though what he gets to do is so goofball at times that part of you can't help but also laugh at the idea that Nero today may be regretting taking place in all this nonsense.

Actually, the bizarre casting of Nero is actually one of the saner parts of this movie. You won't believe what goes on here. A henchman in this western setting that looks and speaks like Hitler! Two kids (named Al Capone and Dutch Schultz!) who are dubbed with adult voices! A villain with a robotic hand! Nero eating onions like apples! A motorcycle gang! The death of one character shown in reverse! Speeded-up action scenes a la the Keystone Kops! And all done with what seems to have been a hefty budget!

Most people will hate this movie, simply calling it stupid. Well, maybe it is stupid. But personally I found it extremely entertaining because of its entirely bizarre nature. The movie never stops delivering wacky situations, each different from the other, and my attention was always held - I couldn't wait to see what new kind of insanity the movie would next pull out of its sleeves. If you like the antics of Terence Hill/Bud Spencer movies, and are accustomed to the unconventional tone many Italian mass-entertainment movies have, give it a look. Like it or hate it, you'll NEVER forget it!
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