Review of The Brainiac

The Brainiac (1962)
6/10
Horror of Horrors :South of the border down Mexico way
23 February 2004
******SPOILERS****** Horror movie released in 1962 from Mexico about a Baron Vitellus who was burned at the stake in 1661 for every crime on the book with the possible exception of speeding and running a red light since automobiles weren't around back then.

At the site of his execution the Baron seeing a comet in the evening sky curses those who condemned him to death. The Baron last words is that when the comet comes back some 300 years hence he'll be back to take out his revenge on his executioners descendants.

Now in Mexico City 300 years later in 1961 Baron Vitellus is back and he's back with a vengeance. Hilarious horror movie with the crazed Baron Vitellus on the loose in Mexico City and the surrounding countryside. The Baron goes out offing the offspring of those who offed him 300 years ago. The cheap and ridicules horror special effects in the film had the Baron when he was in action looking like he was waring a bad Halloween mask that was a cross between Groucho Marks and one of the dogs in the movie "The Killer Shrews".

The Baron does in his victims by sucking out the brains of his victims with what looks like a two foot fork tongue and keeping the brains in a golden punch bowel that he has locked up in his study where we occasionally see him eating them!

It seems odd that the descendants of those who had Baron Vitellus executed were all living in a area that was something like ten square miles, this three hundred later? Did they ever think of moving all those years? The Baron knowing everyone of his victims names and addresses had no trouble at all tracking them all down and, not knowing how else to better describe it, tongue them to dead.

There are some scenes in "The Brainiac" that are really weird even for a low-budget and badly written horror flick like it is. Whenever Baron Vitellus gets ready to turn into the Brainiac and do his victims in his face lights up, like in the comic books when someone gets a bright idea and you see a light bulb blink and light up over his head.

There's also two scenes in the movie when the Baron, changing into the Brainiac, goes after his victims they suddenly freeze in their tracks and their eyes seem to pop out of their heads looking like they were a pair of ping-pong balls. Baron Vitellus also has a way with the ladies in the movie, he seems to be the strong and silent type. In a scene at a bar a very attractive woman goes up to him and starts a conversation buys him a drink and is almost about to invite him to her home and undress and go to bed with him. All the Baron does is just sit there without saying a word to her and then for what seems to be no reason at all, she wasn't one of the descendants of those who did the Baron in as I could see, turns into the Brainiac and does what he did to all his victims in the movie, sucks her brains out.

The Baron Vitellus/Brainiac is finally done in by the two detectives that were on the case with a pair of flame-throwers that left him looking like a mound of bones and ashes. The detectives were also the comic relief in the movie with one looking like a diminutive former Governor Jesse Ventura of Minnesota and the other looking and acting like Phil Silvers with a full head of hair.
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