dinsmoretrevor Reviews

Sky Monster (2023)

Keep Your Money In Your Pants Pocket

[2/10 · 21 May 2024]

My tag-line reads "Keep Your Money In Your Pants Pocket"...that was serious instructions, and not just me being a smart a*s!! This picture is BAD!! From the pretty blonde...with thick, bushy, black eyebrows to this critter, this makes no sense and made me wonder aloud "WHY". This thing is just all around bad news. And lately I have been unfortunate enough to pick some real stinkers. Giving this one a 2 might be too good a rating for a picture that badly needs to be rated in negative numbers. Grizzly Rage might have been as bad as this. But whatever you do, don't watch this because of something that I wrote. I apologize.

Kung Fu (1972–1975)

Bruce Lee Was Turned Down

[9/10 · 21 May 2024]

You read it right...Bruce Lee was turned down for the lead role of Caine. But I think that that was a very smart move. Bruce Lee's own art of Jeet Kune Doo was far too violent for the part of Caine. If you had asked me before it was filmed, I would also say that maybe the show needed a different martial art than Kung Fu, as it also is a very offensive art and does not focus enough on defense. Like maybe Tae Kwon Do or some more passive styles of Karate.

But David Carradine was most DEFINITELY the man for the role. Some of the episodes are understandably not really good. But some are INCREDIBLE!!!! This show launched Carradine into super stardom...and rightly so. I gave it a 9 and maybe it should be a ten. If you have not seen it, buy the DVDs...they are FANTASTIC!!! Thanks and ENJOY!!!!

Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer (1986)

Henry Is A Bad Boy

[7/10 · 20 May 2024]

While Michael Rooker is a pretty good actor, this was NOT a good role for him. Now, whenever I see Rooker, I am going to see that snivelling little pissant Henry Lee Lucas. I'd like to have run into Lucas back when he was alive...I'd truly want a 32 Louisville Slugger with me to do the up close talking to him. Where serial killers might be heroic to some, he DEFINITELY was NOT heroic to me. I'd like to make him the Town Punching Bag for a while, the little bi*ch. And Otis Toole was no better, maybe worse because he went for women AND men, nasty loser. I do like serial killer pictures, the actual killer turns my stomach. I gave this a 7 and prolly shouldn't have. But it is a decent story...if you can stomach it. As always, Thanks and ENJOY!!!

Black Sheep (2006)

One Strange Review

[8/10 · 20 May 2024]

This picture is a weird one. As a standard horror movie, it completely stunk up the room. I wouldn't of given it a 3 of 10. But as a comedy / horror picture, it actually did pretty decent...getting an 8 out of a possible 10. There are places that had me downright rolling on the floor, while doubled over...laughing sooooo hard that I cried. Then there were places that I should have thrown it in the local waterway and called it good. When Experience's friend is attacked by the sheep fetus, I thought that I would choke trying to catch my breath. My wife thought that I was having a seizure...but it was uncontrollable laughter.

I won't bore you anymore...but watch this one as a comedy and you might like it. Thanks and ENJOY!!!

Bermuda Island (2023)

Don't Know What To Think

[7/10 · 19 May 2024]

This picture really confused me. The only actual star is Tom Sizemore and his whole story could of been any dude in the script. Does that make sense??

The actual storyline holds a ton of promise...Plane crashes and survivors have to fend off an island of bloodthirsty monsters. But this was just more of the same old, same old...CRAPOLA!!

Maybe I'm just being harsh but I don't think so. They could have taken this premise places but they didn't.

The monsters were actually quite cool!! Their green color turned out to be quite nice!! LOL I won't waste a lot of your time, I'll just suffice to say that you should give it a shot...maybe you'll really like it.

I gave it a 7 and maybe should of been an 8. As always, Thanks and ENJOY!!!

Area 407 (2012)

Another One Bites The Dust

[4/10 · 17 May 2024]

My luck is total crap lately. I guess that I am going to have to read the IMDB entry for a movie BEFORE I watch it from now on. LOL This is getting ridiculous!! I have picked trash pictures for the last week, with no sign of letting up. This one actually COULD have been great, as the idea for it is AWESOME!!!! A plane crashes into a governmental area for animal testing, and so on and so forth. You could take that and make something really good. But not these folks...they took it and made a crap pie. The only good part was the very end. I knew that that was what was going to happen, I just didn't know how. You can watch it if you want...maybe you'll like it, but please don't hold your breath. I gave it a 4 for the last scene. The rest stunk and made no sense. I apologize.

Crypsis (I) (2019)

What A Streak

[1/10 · 16 May 2024]

What a streak I have been on!! This complete waste of film makes like 5 of the last six pictures that I have picked out to watch and review have been nothing but GARBAGE!!! My grandchildren could make a much, MUCH better offering for a horror film!! The one good movie in those was Killer Klowns From Outer Space. And when Killer Klowns is the best movie in a bunch, the others must have been garbage!! Let's see...Grizzly Rage, Lowlifes, and two or three more lovely examples of cheap movies with no budget. Oh yeah...The Badge, The Bible and Bigfoot was in there, too. I'm gonna have to come here BEFORE I select a picture!! I rated this a one because You can't rate a movie at zero. LOLOL Again, I apologize, folks!!

Beneath (V) (2013)

My New Underground Genre

[8/10 · 16 May 2024]

After really liking The Descent and The Descent Part 2...well, liking...the really might not be needed. I saw that this picture was also about caving and horror, I decided to give it a try.

The cast was pretty much unknown to me. Besides Jeff Fahey, anyway. He was the only one I recognized. But all of the acting seemed solid enough.

The setting was (duuuhhhh) a cave. LOL These pictures go as far as messing with my breathing. Unlike the Descent pictures, Beneath was a good old haunting flick!!

After a cave-in and being trapped, our cast starts getting haunted by quite the evil spirit!! I wont give away any of the goodies in this one, you'll have to watch it yourself. But rest assured that the rest of the picture provides some good scares and some good jumps!!

I gave it an 8 of ten...I probably will watch it again. As always, Thanks and ENJOY!!!

The Badge, the Bible, and Bigfoot (2019)

Bad, bad, bad

[1/10 · 15 May 2024]

If I couldn't make something better than this, I would not even bother. What a waste of film. I didn't know that a picture could even get this bad. PLEASE don't Waste your time or hard-earned money on this garbage. Seriously, folks, blow your money on most anything else would be a better place to waste cash. These folks stayed up at night and hatched a plan to waste time and money. It is sooooooo bad that I am embarrassed for them. If there is an award for biggest piece of junk in the film industry, this DRIVEL should win...twice. I actually rated it a two. Hold on...there...I changed it to a one. I apologize folks.

Lowlifes (2024)

This was baaaad

[3/10 · 14 May 2024]

Right from the start, I thought that this "picture" was a little bit out to lunch. But as it went along, it did NOT get better...it got worse. No plot, no story-line, no nothing!! It jumped around here and there and had absolutely no rhyme or reason. It does this movie a disservice to call it the worse of the year. The worse of all-time would be better. I am sitting here just all agog from how bad this movie is. It actually started out as having possibilities. But when the local "townie" gets in with our traveling family and the son attacks him, everything from there, on...plain old stinks. I rated this one a 3 and I think I'm doing you all a disservice in doing so. Hopefully you wont watch it. I apologize.

Grizzly Rage (2007 TV Movie)

Don't Waste Your Long Green

[3/10 · 13 May 2024]

This has to be the absolute, hands-down biggest waste of time and money that I have ever come across. What a large chunk of DRIVEL. From start to finish, the movie makes out to be a bad piece of fiction from a very, VERY low rated hunting magazine. It starts with kids accidentally running over a bear cub. And the garbage that follows is just utter nonsense. And I figured that it would get better as it went along. NOPE...it actually got worse. And I didn't think that was possible. My boys are horror movie fans and I don't even dare tell them that I watched this junk. I rated it a 3 and I hope that people save their money. Thanks everyone.

Whiteout (2009)

Good For A Picture To Be Shot Here

[9/10 · 11 May 2024]

I am extremely glad that someone has finally shot a picture down there!! Of all the places for a killing to take place, it finally happened where the weather alone WILL kill you, and kill you quick. I have a defective thyroid gland, so cold weather REALLY bothers me. Anything below 60 degrees and I am totally debilitated. You can tell that the characters take the cold very seriously here. Kate Beckinsale is as usual...a breath of fresh air. She is one of my favorite women actors. And she always gives 110% in whatever role she has. Tom Skerrit is in this one. Man, he has aged since ALIEN, where he played mission commander Dallas aboard the Nostromo. I gave this one a 9. I really hope that you like it too. As always Thanks and ENJOY!!!

First Blood (1982)

Long Before The Picture

[9/10 · 11 May 2024]

I bought an old, beat up little paperback book at a school book-sale when I was a Freshman in high school. To be truthful, the front cover was missing and on that first page you could see the "F-word". It was a sale in school, so seeing the swear-word, I bought it for 10 cents. It turned out to be a copy of "First Blood" by David Morrell. From the first page, I was mesmerized. It turned out to be one of the best books that I had ever read. (in the book, Rambo kills all the men chasing him in the woods) About six months later, I heard that it was being made into a movie!!! I couldn't wait!!!! And when it came out, my life was complete!! LOLOLOL With all the talent that is in this picture, how could it go wrong?? The script was rock-solid. The scenery was impeccable. The action is non-stop. If you have not seen it by now, PLEASE get out and buy it and get to watching it. I gave it a 9 of 10. And I guarantee you will love it too. As usual, Thanks and ENJOY!!!

Troll Hunter (2010)

At A Loss For Words

[7/10 · 10 May 2024]

Like my little intro here says, I am at a loss for words when it comes to the picture "Troll Hunter". I can't seem to find anything good to say about this picture. I actually fell asleep while watching this one. There was one point that I thought that the troll's nose was a totally phallic symbol. I am serious...the troll's nose looked like a"you know what". LMAO These trolls were huge, and I thought that trolls were supposed to be tiny. Maybe not "tiny", but certainly not huge, either. I don't like my rating (7) but I hedge to rate it higher. (or lower) LOL. This picture is just weird. You should try it and see how you like it. As always Thanks and ENJOY!!!

Jeremiah Johnson (1972)

Give A 10 A 10

[10/10 · 10 May 2024]

Jeremiah Johnson is, in my own humble opinion, one of the greatest pictures ever produced!! My Dad took me to see it in the theater when I was but a wee lad. I remember getting popcorn and a White Rock Black Cherry soda!! I still drink it if I am lucky enough to find it. Johnson actually reminded me of my incredible father!! Tough as nails when he needed to be. But could be as soft-hearted as a new puppy most of the time.

We never actually find out why or from who Johnson is presumably running. I remember him having an honest to goodness Hawken rifle. When I was but a young feller, I thought that a muzzle-loader was the way to go...and we know that there are none better than a Hawken. Johnson finds his frozen to the corpse of uts previous owner!!

I know I was nearly heart-broken when his wife and son are killed by Indians, and Johnson goes on the war-path.

PLEASE...IF YOU HAVEN'T SEEN THIS MOVIE...DO SO.... ASAP I gave it a perfect ten. I hope that you love it like I do.

As always, Thanks and ENJOY!!!

Train to Busan (2016)

Easy To Watch

[9/10 · 10 May 2024]

At the start, I thought that this picture was going to be really hard to watch...boy, was I wrong!! Very easy to watch...character development that was also very easy and engaging. Every time there was a small event that worked its way to the climax at the end...even those developed really easily and were not hard on the viewer. I am already hoping for another trip to Busan, wether it be a train or an old jalopy...count me waaayyy in. The two main characters are a father and daughter...taking, you guessed it...a train to Busan. LOL By the time they reach Busan, they have been through all manners of hell. I won't spoil it for you, but let us just say that only one makes it. LOL Now go and watch it!!! I gave it a 9 and prolly should of given it a ten. Anyway, Thanks and ENJOY!!!

Knock at the Cabin (2023)

Shyamalan Does It Again

[9/10 · 9 May 2024]

I might just as well come right out and say it...M. Night Shyamalan scared the living HELL out of me with this one!! What else can I say?? By the end, I was almost sick to my stomach, shaking like a leaf in a stiff breeze, the whole deal!! LOLOLOL The acting was SUPERB...from gigantic Dave Bautista on down to Kristen Cui these people took their jobs seriously. I didn't bother to see who did the casting, but they were as good at it as anyone ever. These four intruders being the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse just grabbed me by the throat and shook me hard. You definitely owe it to yourself to watch this picture...more than once. I am going to get my second viewing when I am done writing this. I gave it a 9 and feel as though I cheated M. Night. As always...Thanks and ENJOY!!!

A View to a Kill (1985)

Amazing Castwise

[9/10 · 8 May 2024]

This picture is amazing in a few ways. For starters, the complete cast is just incredible!! Roger Moore, of course. Then you have the AMAZING Christopher Walken, Grace Jones, Patrick MacNee.. And lets not forget the very beautiful Tanya Roberts.

Christopher Walken plays total Psychopath, Max Zorin. He is looking to cause earthquakes along the San Andreas fault-line in California. Thus sinking Silicon Valley and making him the king of the super-conductor world. If you are saying "that's pretty far-fetched", worry not as I agree with you completely. While yes it is pretty far-fetched, it has all the ear-marks of a good Bond picture...great cast, lots of action, solid script, etc etc. I'll stop before I give away too much. I rated this a 9 of 10. I hope that you like it too. As always...Thanks and ENJOY!!!

Death Hunt (1981)

Long Before The Picture...

[10/10 · 7 May 2024]

I was a big fan of anti-hero Albert Johnson long before this picture. It is based on a book called "The Mad Trapper of Rat River", which I read for a book report when I was in 5th grade. LOL. It is a fascinating story and really shows how hard a tough man can be willing to fight for his freedom. The book didn't say anything about any accusations of murder. Johnson DID kill a game warden that had come to his cabin to investigate some traps that had been messed with. When the law returned in force, he had turned his little cabin into a fortress complete with a dug out floor and gun ports to shoot through. I rated this one a 10 out of 10 as it made for a perfect picture. Even my Dad loved it!! Hopefully you will love it as well. As always, Thanks and ENJOY!!!

For Your Eyes Only (1981)

Crossbow or Bust

[9/10 · 7 May 2024]

This is also a very cool picture. (as 99% of Bond pictures ARE very cool!! Just the crossbow action in this one makes it worth the while. And nympho-maniac wannabe BeBe (played by Lynn-Holly Johnson) is a scary addition to the cast. The script is very solid, as casting is as well. The scenery is as amazing as it always is. The ski slopes in this one are incredible. Bond taking on the would-be killer hockey players is a nice comedy break. I also really like the dove hat pins. And the mentioned crossbow action?? I hoped that it was going to be a factor throughout the whole picture, but not quite. I've given up enough of this one. You'll just have to watch it yourself. LOL As always, Thanks and ENJOY!!!

The Visit (I) (2015)

Didn't want to....

[8/10 · 7 May 2024]

I am a HUUUUUUGEEE fan of M. Night Shyamalan. Enough so I really don't like watching his pictures, as I am afraid that I won't like it and will have to watch it 20 times and just hate it all the while. But this one is awesome as usual. Those poor kids (Becca is Olivia Dejonge and Tyler is Ed Oxenbould) went through some serious hell in the short time that they were there. My computer is making typing near impossible. If these elderly folks ever acted the way that they do, they would be locked up before dark. It is damned near the end before you find out what is going on. I gave this one a strong 8 and you will like it too. As usual, Thanks and ENJOY!!!

Live and Let Die (1973)

A Hard Review

[9/10 · 6 May 2024]

I, at first, thought that this was going to be a difficult picture to review, but I was wrong. Bond pictures aren't hard to review, especially when you are a tremendous fan like I am. Jane Seymour and Yaphet Kotto costar in this one, as Solitaire and Kananga, respectively. There is a positively AMAZING boat chase in this one. Through miles of bayou. One of Bond's persuers goes crashing through a Cajun wedding that is taking place. The world's longest jump with a speedboat was filmed in / for this picture. You also get to meet Sheriff JW Pepper, who we meet again in the Man With the Golden Gun. I wont give up any more juicy tidbits...you'll just have to see it for yourself. As always, Thanks and ENJOY!!!

Moonraker (1979)

Who Wants To Have A Space Race

[9/10 · 6 May 2024]

This has to be my favorite Bond picture with Roger Moore!! I was always very, VERY interested in outer space when I was much younger. And Bond pictures were certainly my favorite movies. So combining the two just seemed like a natural progression to me!! LOL Plus it has Jaws in it and that is certainly a big help. Right at the beginning when the whole crew of a 747 is sacrificed to steal an orbiter, I knew that this was going to be a great picture!! And a little later on we see Drax's henchman let the dobermans go on Drax's hapless secretary. Personally, I thought that to be one of the more brutel killings in all of the Bond franchise. There is a space battle at the end that rivals Thunderball's underwater battle in sheer size and number of combatants. I gave this one a 9 rating and I hope that you like it as much as I did. As always, Thanks and ENJOY!!!

Transformers: Rise of the Beasts (2023)

YeeeeHaaaaaaaaa

[9/10 · 6 May 2024]

I just adore these Transformer pictures!! The action is always non-stop...the story is usually top shelf...the script might need a touch-up here and there...the special effects are in a class by themselves!!! Just the voices of the machines are usually as good as it gets!! The casting is usually fantastic and so on and so forth. Just the fact that these exotic machines came from a galaxy far far away (wait a minute!! LOL) is pretty darned awesome!! I can't imagine being the human that gets to be friends with these guys!! Just the fact that you get to ride along with one of these dudes is completely over the top. I rated this one a 9 and I hope that you like it too. As always, Thanks and ENJOY!!!

The Man with the Golden Gun (1974)

Tattoo Before Fantasy Island

[9/10 · 5 May 2024]

This is probably the most overlooked of all of the Bond pictures. And I don't know why as it is very, very good!! (in my humble opinion anyway. This is also the very first place that I ever saw Herve Villachaize. , some time before Fantasy Island. Christopher Lee plays Scaramanga...the man with the golden gun. He is a high-priced assassin. He gets a cool million a hit. Britt Eckland and Maud Adams are both in this picture. This is one of those pictures that HAS to be watched more than once. Just once and you miss three quarters of the details. I love the part where Scaramanga smokes Hai Phat...he assembles his golden gun right in front of Phat and just guns him down. LOLOLOLOL I gave this one a nine. I hope that you like it too. As always Thanks and ENJOY!!!