After opening with some mandatory female toplessness, UNSEEN EVIL 2 begins.
Three nameless characters (aka: monster fodder) are investigating a cave, when they immediately discover a massive treasure. This isn't difficult, since it's sitting right out in the open. Obviously, there are monsters about, and the anonymous trio is quickly reduced to red, icky goo.
Next, a group of belligerent paramilitary types, with a collective IQ of about 8, are sent to investigate the cave. Haphazard plotting and unforgivable non-action ensue. The dialogue appears to have been written on the fly, by semi-sentient mildew, and certainly, the roles could have been played with equal believability, by a team of home-cleaning robots.
The only thing worse than the humans in this movie is the "monster" itself. This is due to the "special" effects, that can only be described, in technical terms, as digital dung. The shameful CGI is far inferior to that used in first generation DOOM computer animation. Making matters even worse, the "practical" effects amount to a giant, rubber homunculus that blubbers around while killing Priscilla Barnes! This is followed by the blatant burning of a toy building, standing in for some actual structure.
This sewer raft co-stars Phoebe Dollar, who always seems to gravitate toward these wretched roles. Sometimes she's good. Here, well...
Three nameless characters (aka: monster fodder) are investigating a cave, when they immediately discover a massive treasure. This isn't difficult, since it's sitting right out in the open. Obviously, there are monsters about, and the anonymous trio is quickly reduced to red, icky goo.
Next, a group of belligerent paramilitary types, with a collective IQ of about 8, are sent to investigate the cave. Haphazard plotting and unforgivable non-action ensue. The dialogue appears to have been written on the fly, by semi-sentient mildew, and certainly, the roles could have been played with equal believability, by a team of home-cleaning robots.
The only thing worse than the humans in this movie is the "monster" itself. This is due to the "special" effects, that can only be described, in technical terms, as digital dung. The shameful CGI is far inferior to that used in first generation DOOM computer animation. Making matters even worse, the "practical" effects amount to a giant, rubber homunculus that blubbers around while killing Priscilla Barnes! This is followed by the blatant burning of a toy building, standing in for some actual structure.
This sewer raft co-stars Phoebe Dollar, who always seems to gravitate toward these wretched roles. Sometimes she's good. Here, well...