The Ambulance (1990)
7/10
Nee-nah nee-nah nee-YES!
21 May 2021
Eric Roberts, sporting an impressive mullet, plays Marvel comic artist Josh Baker, who tries his luck with the beautiful stranger he sees every day on the way to work. Not one to take 'no' for an answer (making him a sexual predator by today's standards), he pursues the woman (Janine Turner), even buying her a Walkman from a street vendor (she throws it back at him: probably didn't have Megabass and auto-reverse). However, when the woman suddenly collapses in the street and Josh comes to her help, he learns a little more about her: she is diabetic and her name is Cheryl. An ambulance arrives and whisks her to hospital, or so it seems...

In reality, Cheryl has been kidnapped by human traffickers, who sell people with diabetes for medical experimentation. When Josh is unable to locate Cheryl at any of the local hospitals, he tries to find out what has happened to her, enlisting the help of grouchy New York detective Lt. Spencer (James Earl Jones), elderly newspaper reporter Elias Zacharai (Red Buttons), and pretty policewoman Sandra Malloy (Megan Gallagher)

Like most of director Larry Cohen's movies, The Ambulance is a quirky little B-movie, packed with offbeat performances, often bordering on the camp (Jones, gum in mouth, chews up the scenery and Roberts' mannerisms are strange, to say the least). The film's oddball approach and OTT acting help to make it an entertaining time-waster for fans of cult cinema, despite the somewhat off-putting nature of Josh's flowing locks (not surprised that Cheryl said 'no' to him; do you think Eric Roberts ever looks back at his work from this period and cringes?). Cohen keeps the action moving at a fair lick, with plenty of mystery and peril, and a particularly well-handled final act that features lots of dangerous looking stunt-work.

Of the six Cohen films I have seen so far (The Ambulance, Full Moon High, Special Effects, Q-The Winged Serpent, It's Alive, and The Stuff), this is easily my favourite. 6.5/10, rounded up to 7 for Stan Lee as Stan Lee - not much acting required, but at least it's not just a pointless blink-and-you'll-miss-it cameo like in the MCU movies.
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