BERMUDA TRIANGLE is the story of the titular three-sided area, and its effect on a ship full of passengers. We quickly notice that this place causes peculiar voice-over dubbing, making children sound like adults that are pinching their noses while they speak. There's also a devil doll with its own theme music, found bobbing in the ocean. Said plastic menace gets more screen time than most of the humans!
Why does the music from FORBIDDEN PLANET keep playing?
Characters include: The "zany cook", straight out of the 1930's. The ship's captain, who has more hair on his head and face than an orangutan has on its entire body. The "wise engine room guy" who waxes mysterious, while someone plays a saw. Then, there's the lady and her bitter, jackass husband who has "anchor" written all over him! How is he NOT at the bottom of the sea?
Thankfully, there's a blonde hottie on board who brought only a bikini for the voyage. Her presence helps to numb the agony caused by the rest of this debacle. Someone convinced John Huston to be in this bilge. Wasn't TENTACLES enough?
Cue the endless underwater scuba shots, where sharks are senselessly slaughtered for the sake of this hogwash.
Oh no!
Disaster strikes, leaving bikini-girl trapped under water! Nooo! Why her? Why not the idiot husband or the werewolf captain? Oh hurrah! She's saved, though her knees now look like raw meatloaf.
Arrr, there's a storm a-brewin'!
The devil doll gets to work, while stock lightning flashes.
Now, it's time for THE BEST SCENE IN THE MOVIE: Engine room guy tries to weld the underside of the boat, only to have devil doll mystically send him through the ship's propeller like a sack of tomatoes through a wood chipper! Blllooorssh!
Be advised, this film is schlock meant only for those seeking a good brain hammering...
Why does the music from FORBIDDEN PLANET keep playing?
Characters include: The "zany cook", straight out of the 1930's. The ship's captain, who has more hair on his head and face than an orangutan has on its entire body. The "wise engine room guy" who waxes mysterious, while someone plays a saw. Then, there's the lady and her bitter, jackass husband who has "anchor" written all over him! How is he NOT at the bottom of the sea?
Thankfully, there's a blonde hottie on board who brought only a bikini for the voyage. Her presence helps to numb the agony caused by the rest of this debacle. Someone convinced John Huston to be in this bilge. Wasn't TENTACLES enough?
Cue the endless underwater scuba shots, where sharks are senselessly slaughtered for the sake of this hogwash.
Oh no!
Disaster strikes, leaving bikini-girl trapped under water! Nooo! Why her? Why not the idiot husband or the werewolf captain? Oh hurrah! She's saved, though her knees now look like raw meatloaf.
Arrr, there's a storm a-brewin'!
The devil doll gets to work, while stock lightning flashes.
Now, it's time for THE BEST SCENE IN THE MOVIE: Engine room guy tries to weld the underside of the boat, only to have devil doll mystically send him through the ship's propeller like a sack of tomatoes through a wood chipper! Blllooorssh!
Be advised, this film is schlock meant only for those seeking a good brain hammering...