4/10
Not working at all and Horn is not the problem
20 September 2016
Warning: Spoilers
"Waschen, schneiden, legen" is a German movie from 1999 and of course it is also in German-language as you already understand from the title. This one will have its 20th anniversary soon. The director and also one of the many writers is Adolf Winkelmann and while he does not have a really famous film under his belt, he still has a handful movies made in the last decades that are still somewhat known today. This one here is mostly comedy with a serious relationship moment here and there. Today, Guildo Horn is probably not that anymore, even here in Germany, but back then he was a big star and a lot of it had to do with his fairly decent result at the Grand Prix d'Eurovision. And like some other musicians and comedians, he also got his own film. The good thing is that he actually learned a honorable profession, namely as a therapist for people with a disability, before he entered the show business and started working with Stefan Raab for example. But in this movie here, he works as a barber. On a random side note, Horn's real name is Horst Köhler, the one of a fairly famous German (ex-)politician too.

But back to this film. It needs to be said that Horn has no connection to acting whatsoever, so you should not expect a great performance here because you obviously aren't getting one. But unlike other showbiz people (Mario Barth e.g.), Horn knows his limits and boundaries very well and never tries to give a great performance. Of course, he is really forgettable for a lead performance overall, but at least he is not desperately trying to make an impact and he would have really failed in a cringeworthy manner that way I am sure. This is also why the worst thing about the film is certainly not Horn's performance, it is one of the bearable aspects. The worst thing is the script for sure. Major plot points do not feel authentic and the dialogues are sometimes really bad that it becomes difficult, almost impossible to make the love story line (that was supposed to be touching) work at all. One example would be a little boy speaking about how it's most important that the girls is coming in a pretty sleazy reference. Embarrassing stuff really. The most baffling thing is that so many people worked on the script and still they come up with something that is a 2/10 at best. I wish they could have taken Horn's approach that may have turned out a bit lacking ambition and dedication, but at least it would not have become as much of a failure as it actually did. It's especially bad in the second half. I do not recommend the watch. Thumbs down.
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