Stalingrad (2013)
3/10
Formulaic Pulp
5 January 2014
The special effects are truly awesome. The field of battle in the beleaguered city is reproduced with no expense spared. Battle scenes reach new levels of 3D imagination and gore. And the film is the perfect advertisement for a great new digital game involving endless death and mass murder.

But Stalingrad is just classic Hollywood pulp sold off as a Russian movie. Virtually every character is a fake. The German Brigade Commander is shown perpetually attended by lackeys who wash and shave him. His forces spend the entire film attempting to take a building in which a half dozen Russians are holed up with a young girl that none of them rapes. Meanwhile the German company commander spends most of his time attempting to woo a Russian girl who eventually, of course, he rapes. Instead of blowing the whole building up with tank guns these valiant Germans led by fools perpetually storm the building in their hundreds only to be shot down and blown to pieces by grenades cleverly thrown by the handful of Russians inside it. Women stand at doorways in a sniper zone just to say goodbye. The Russians perform Italian operatic arias instead of Russian folk songs whilst stupid Germans always lose their lives by endlessly pausing before pulling the trigger.

But worse of all the script reads like a Stalinist message about the heroic struggle of the people against a ruthless maniac German machine that would enslave them for a thousand years. The real importance of Stalingrad as a symbol essential to win for both sides is never explained. And the ruthless sacrifice by the Soviet leadership of millions of their own people is never mentioned. Avoid this rubbish and stick to the original German version which is ten times better.
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