Review of Lovers Lane

Lovers Lane (2000)
5/10
This movie is at least 15 years overdue!
7 January 2010
It really is too damn bad that this movie wasn't released fifteen years sooner; in the early 1980's. If that were the case, it could have been named "My Blood Valentine 2: Lover's Lane" and maybe – just maybe – the film would have enjoyed a modest little cult reputation by now. Instead, "Lover's Lame" came out in 1999, at the end of a decade that is widely considered as a low point in horror, and then still it attempts to rip off the wrong films! The DVD cover showcases the picture of a hook-hand as well as something that strangely resembles the Ghostface mask. So in other words, "Lover's Lane" attempts to cash in on the two most popular contemporary horror films of that era – "I Know What You Did Last Summer" and "Scream" – but actually hasn't got anything to do with either of them. This film is, as said, much more reminiscent to the crazed slasher outings of the eighties, what with its extremely clichéd situations and absurd plot twists. I was prepared to watch something really dull and irritating, but "Lover's Lane" actually is quite entertaining and definitely a worthwhile little homage/throwback to that glorious decade of slasher-goodness. The film begins with the discovery of two young people on Valentine's Day butchered in their car on Lover's Lane. The victims were both married and each had a child, so the event caused quite the scandal in the little town where everybody appears to be related to each other. A local nut case was caught at the scene of the crime and submitted to a mental asylum. Thirteen years later, when the victims' kids have turned into frustrated teenagers and their surviving parents are still grieving; the nut escapes from the asylum. And naturally it's Valentine's Day again and of course he recovers his beloved hook-hand just in time to make it to the kids' sex party on Lover's Lane. Yeah, the plot is quite clichéd and predictable, but that doesn't necessarily mean there isn't any suspense or creativity to detect. The death scenes inside the farm house, for example, are admirably bloodcurdling and the revelation near the end is quite ingenious too. And just like it was the case in the 1980's, this slasher contains a couple of delightful and senseless "WTF" moments, like when a mature woman – a school principal even – knocks out a drunken teenage girl or when the faceless shot shows naked breasts that clearly belong to a different girl than the one who's taking her top off. "Lover's Lane" honestly isn't as awful as its rating and most of the reviews around here make it out to be. If you think it might help, just pretend you stepped into a time machine and traveled back to the year 1981.
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