4/10
"Never fool with a fuzz ball."
29 March 2009
The first of the more than half a dozen Police Academy sequels took a huge step downwards. It's amazing to think that so many sequels were made when the original wasn't even very good and the sequels were immediately crappy. Then again, with a tagline like "Their First Assignment," it's impossible to think that they might have stopped making sequels at part 2. I watched the first two movies a couple days ago and my immediate reaction was to wonder what the original audiences thought of the movies. The comedy is now so dated and goofy that I can't imagine it ever being genuinely funny, except in the way that it's funny to see the things that people wore in the 80s.

Times have definitely changed, and one way that they seem to have changed more than anything else, in this movie and countless others, is the way that the outcasts of society dressed. Watch any 80s movie that has gangsters or rappers or punk or any of the above in it, and I challenge you not to laugh out loud at the styles that were 'cool' back then. Some choice selections in the Friday the 13th series are classic for this kind of comedy, as are the Police Academy sequels.

But at any rate, it's important to notice that this kind of thing makes re-watching these old movies more fun, not less. You will find yourself laughing at things completely different from what was originally meant to be funny, but it's still a good time nonetheless. However, the problem with the original movie was the bad jokes that went on for too long. There is a place for tasteless jokes in the movies, but not when they keep going and going until you just feel uncomfortable. When Commandant Lassard was up at that podium attempting to give a speech while the prostitute was behind the curtain, I was trying to imagine someone still laughing by the time it finally stopped and I just couldn't picture it, and part 2 has the same problem.

All of the relevant cast are back and they are all graduates now working in the real world. Mahoney is riding a three-wheeler on what looks like the northern part of Santa Monica beach while Tackleberry has managed to secure the top position of a school crossing guard, something that I thought was reserved for elderly citizens looking for volunteer work.

Commandant Lassard's brother Pete is introduced as the captain of police precinct 16, which has finally been awarded the official title of worst precinct in the city, and our dear old police chief Henry Hurst is fed up with all the riffraff. He is giving Pete Lassard 30 days to turn the precinct around before he throws him out and awards his job to Part 2's funniest cast addition Lieutenant Mouser, who easily surpasses the missing Lieutenant Harris from the first movie in oily creepiness and sheer, unapologetic ass-kissing.

Pete Lassard thus sets about on a mission to turn his precinct from an embarrassment to a success using the six new recruits awarded to him by his brother, while Mouser sets about on a mission to ensure their failure. So the new recruits are Mahoney, Tackleberry, Hightower, Brooks (the one with the voice that truly lives up to Mouser's name, which is probably why he picks on her so much), Larvell Jones, the guy with the sounds, and Fackler, the geeky, accident-prone white guy with the nutty wife.

While it's true that the plot of Police Academy 2 is as thin and see-through as grandma's underpants, I would be lying if I said it was without its amusing moments. Sadly, most of the ones that were meant to be amusing are not. Larvell Jones' first scene, where he makes bodily noises in a restaurant and ruins the date between some uppity tool and his even more uppity date, is about as un-funny as any failed slapstick skit I've ever seen, but I imagine that at least the epoxy-shampoo gag was once a mildly entertaining joke.

But while much of the original comedy has completely disappeared along with Bobcat Goldthwait's bizarre screamy tantrums and Steve Guttenberg's career, there are some other things that remain a bit of fun. Tackleberry's obsession with guns is tied to a total lack of sexual experience in a development of psychological depth that I would never have expected from a Police Academy movie, and while Mahoney's slovenly partner, now better known as the "gas man" from Dumb & Dumber, plays the greasy sloppiness of his character through the roof, you can't help but admire his effort.

But that whole third act with Mahoney undercover can just be tossed to the wolves. WOW. Bobcat Goldthwait's entire performance in this movie is ridiculous in the extreme, but at least he was SUPPOSED to look foolish and nuts. Mahoney's undercover act was just stupid, and this is not a term that I use lightly.

I've seen all of the Police Academy movies, but before a couple days ago I hadn't seen any of them in at least ten years, and so don't remember anything about any of the other sequels. I can only hope that they get better or at least don't get worse, although it is not very discouraging that my limited perusal of various online reviews names this as one of the "better sequels." Wish me luck
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