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Fantasy Island (2021)
The Acting is Painful to Watch
The person playing Elena, the main character, cannot act. Whenever she speaks, it sounds like she's reading. She uses zero intonation, she has less intonation in her voice than you'd here in a chemistry lecture or Good Friday Mass in a Catholic Church. I had to stop watching the show. The parts without her in it are okay, but I don't understand with all the people applying for acting jobs how Fox couldn't find someone who can actually act.
Black·ish (2014)
It's The Middle with a rich man instead of a poor woman
Every episode is Dre, a well off man, whining about something. It's annoying, and reminds of the Middle, which was about Frankie, a poor woman, whining about something every episode. Watchable garbage, but I wouldn't go out of my way to watch this.
Vintage Tech Hunters (2018)
Suprisingly good
I originally set out to watch this show because I saw a commercial for it and found the guys really attractive. But the guys aside, the content is really interesting. They find some ridiculous items. And I like when they show the old commercials for some of the products they find. Mind you, some of the prices are ridiculous, but not like it's money, so whatever.
Alex Strangelove (2018)
Better than most movies I've seen in theatres 2018
I was actually shocked, because going in I thought it was going to be your typical, cheesy, sappy teen romance. But it was actually well scripted, well acted, had a good plotline, and had humorous moments and good character development. Though, no lies, the scene where the kid of guy from licking a toad, all I could think of was the toad episode of Family Guy, and the song is now stuck my head as a result.
Alpha (2018)
No one, let alone Morgan Freeman, narrated this movie
When I saw on here that Morgan Freeman is listed as a narrator, I asked my friend I saw the movie with just to make sure I wasn't just insane, and he didn't remember that movie being narrated either. Because it wasn't.
The movie doesn't make any sense. It's labelled: "Europe 20000 years ago", but it's clearly North America, the people are speaking a North American language, and the characters look North American. Literally, all you would've had to do was label it "North America 20000 years ago" to avoid this confusion.
Keda should've been dead multiple times. You get stuck under ice in water for 5 minutes and survive. The cold will make you sink. He would've died when he fell off the cliff, and died again when he fell off it again. A foot of water is not enough to break your fall.
Dogs/wolves were domesticated over 20000 years ago, or at least that's what I saw in some NatGeo documentary, The Science of Dogs.
Keda had only been hunting walking distance from his home, but it took him seasons to get home.
Then at the end, Keda comes home and Mom and Dad are just "yay, Keda's home." When they should've been freaking out that someone they thought was dead just walked up to them. And then Mom should've been mad at dad for just abandoning not-dead Keda. And Dad should've been freaking out that he abandoned not-dead Keda.
Not to mention, the movie dragged on. There wasn't even an hour of content in this 1.5 hour movie. It was just mostly Keda and Daya walking for seasons and nothing happening.
I don't understand the high reviews, unless there is a version of this actually narrated by Morgan Freeman, which is better(but that's sure not what I saw).
Far from the worst thing I've seen this year. But not worth the money. And especially not worth the extra 3$ as it was only playing in 3D, and there's nothing in the movie that's 3D-worthy.
Ant-Man and the Wasp (2018)
Best Disney Marvel Movie All Decade
Pretty much every single Marvel movie I have seen, all the actors speak in monotonous, fake British accents that make the movie worse than it really is.
I was surprised hat they actually hired a lot of decent actors for this like Michael Douglas and Lawrence Fishburne.
It started out with actual plotline, which is rare for anything Disney and the first hour was decent. But then the last hour was your typical, plot-less, scriptless, continuous violence for the sake of violence.
All in all, the best Disney Marvel movie I've seen this decade.
Overboard (2018)
Audio-Visual Ipecac
This movie should've skipped theatres and gone straight to Lifetime. . .if even. A lot of tv movies are decent. This was not. For the first half hour, I would've given it a 5/10, and counted as one of those good movies to kill time with on a Sunday afternoon. Except it just kept getting worse and worse. The acting was terrible. The script was stupid. It kept switching between Spanish and English, which normally doesn't bother me as I enjoyed Exposed, which was English/Spanish, but also other dual language movies like the Tiger franchise (Urdu/English) and Bon Cop Bad Cop(French/English), but this movie just gave me a headache.
I think they were going to a romantic comedy. But it was pretty much a woman breaking the law, severly emotionally/psychologically abusing a man into Stockholme syndrome, and then being rewarded at the end, basically made to look like a good person even though what she did was absolutely despicable. I was actually surprised that a movie without any real physical or sexual violence could manage to be so morally repulsive.
I found the movie nauseating and despicable to the point where a bottle of Pepto would've done me good in that movie.
Uncle Drew (2018)
1st half sucks/2nd half decent
The first half was so bad. It was just Lil Rey Howery ranting and whining like a little btch for 40 minutes straight. Then finally, 40 minutes in, he finally shut up and the movie started being about the other players, the game, and all and was actually decent.
So the first half of the movie I'd give 4/10, the second half about 7/10, so I gave it a 6 overall.
To be honest, my opinion is probably biased negatively towards the movie, because I don't really find sports interesting and don't follow them at all to the point where I spent the entire movie confused that Shaquille O'Neal was in his 70s, when I was sure he was much much younger, and I was too dumb to realize that all the old guys were actually young guys dressed as old people.
But if you like basketball/sports movies you'll probably like the movie more than I did.
Hereditary (2018)
started off good; ending was awful
So for the first hour and a half, this would have been the best movie I'd seen all year. It was actually creepy/scary, and I watch a lot of horror movies so I generally don't get scared/anxious in horror movies anymore.
But the movie keeps building up suspense and foreshadowing until you get to the end, and *poof*, none of that foreshadowing comes together. Nothing is explains. It just has a random ending and you don't find out why all the other events were connected.
Also, the parents were white and their son clearly was not, and he wasn't adopted because the mother mentioned being preggers with him. I understand he may have been the best actor for the role, but you could've added something to the plot---like he was a sperm donor baby, or a different father, or even have made him adopted---to have it make sense.
Gave it 7/10 because I was entertained for the first hour.
Ready Player One (2018)
too long
This was a two and a half hour movie for a half hour of content.
I didn't read the book, aside from chapter 1, but given from how every once and a a while the movie would hint at a plot or theme or morale, I assume the book did actually have a story line.
This was 50% 80s references(which I'm aware is from the book), 45% horrible CGI fight/action/violence scenes, and 5% story line. The character development in the movie is zero. I'm pretty sure the whole movie was filmed in front of a green screen. It felt like I was watching a video game demo, which I guess was somewhat the point as it happened in a video game, but it was just visually unappealing to the eyes.
The avatars were hideous. OASIS was hideous.
And a complaint toward both the movie and the book, I am so tired of 1980s music and references. I was born in the 1980s and never even got to experience the 1990s, 2000s, and 2010s fully because society is stuck in the 1980s for some reason.
Maybe the music was good in the 1980s, but having to hear the same songs continuously for my entire life means hearing 80s music just gives me a raging headache.
Adrift (2018)
This should've been a documentary not a movie
The story is based on a true story that happened in the 1980s.
The story is interesting, but doesn't have enough content to be a feature film. At an hour and a half, this movie was obviously stretched out, and it drained from the movie.
If it had been condensed to a 40 minutes(1 hour with commercials) documentary instead of a feature film, I think it would've portrayed the real life incident better, and been of much better quality.
I also dislike Shailene Woodley. I might be biased, because my dislike for her stems from my raging hatred to Divergent, not just the movies but the books as well. Not to mention, she had her nipples poking out in every scene and was just full on nude just for the hell of it in one scene. And I'm not completely against nudity in movies so long as it's relevant to the plot. But it was just distracting in this. Come on, this movie is for women. If any character should've been naked or close to it should've been Sam Claflin. Seriously, there were only 2 men in that whole theater, both dragged there by women. Women do not go to see "romantic" movies to see unappealing female nudity.
The Whole Truth (2016)
Great story; horrible execution
The story of this movie is great. it has great characters, great story line, and an unending you won't see coming.
The execution of this movie was horrendous. It's set out in a courthouse with witness testimony with the occasional flashback. Criminal court is absolutely boring to sit through in real life, the only thing making it better on big screen is that the testimony is significantly condensed. Because the story is told in an such an uninteresting method, you end up feeling bored despite the story being actually interesting.
This would've been better shown with scenes of the trials and in depth flashbacks to the incidents separate from witness testimony.
.
Also, I know the law changes depending on where you go. But, pretty sure you can't leave confidential legal files scattered around a motel room where any maid can walk in and read it. Sounds like reasonable grounds for disbarment to me.
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It was also strange to see Jim Belushi in not a comedy.
Life of the Party (2018)
bad characters ruined the movie
This movie had potential, and if you goal is to sit around with a bunch of your girl friends eating Tostitos and doing your nails with a good laugh, this movie is good for this.
I feel this movie could've been a lot better.
First, I don't understand why Debby Ryan is the second highest billed character in the movie, because her character was pretty much useless to the movie, and it kind of felt like her character was an afterthought, like, "Oh no, we should have another antagonist." as if Deanna(Melissa McCarthy's) ex husband and his new boo weren't enough of antagonists.
Debby Ryan's acting was horrible and, seriously, no one in college makes fun of the mature students. When I was in university, a good portion of my classes were people in their 30s and highers, many of them taking upgrade classes for their careers, and others who just didn't get it right the first time and wanted to start over, and the younger students didn't make fun of them for being older. Bullying is a high school thing. Also, when I went to college, I thought I was going to be one of the older students in the class being 24, but most of my class was 30+.
Not to mention, if you're in University to complete a last year to a degree you dropped out of 30 years ago, you're probably going to apply as a special student, so you wouldn't be living in Res.(Unless it's different in USA than it is here)
Maddie's friends, their characters did not match with what they were doing. Her friends were socially awkward nerds, especially the one played by Jessie Ennis(Who's name I forget and is unlisted here). These are not the students who would be hitting up every Frat party and getting pissass drunk. I know it's a stereotype that college students love going out getting drunk, which is true of a good portion of college students, but definitely not all. Someone like Jessie Ennis's character who was genuinely afraid of goth girl Leonore, would be the kind of person who is afraid of alcohol and who hates loud, crowded parties.
Breaking In (2018)
the people giving this bad reviews are snobs
The movie about someone saving their family members has been done to death? So has every other subject. It's the storyline, script, and execution that make this good.
The movie is straight to the point. The violence in this movie is relevant to the storyline, and not excessive. Shaun's (Gabrielle Union) main goal is getting her kids out of the house. She tries to reason with them. Tells them they can have the money: she doesn't care. Just so long as they let Glover and Jaz out of the house. Violence is used only as a last resort.
I find the best movies are the ones where you can connect/empathize with even the bad guys, as you can with Sam's character in this movie. He's a thief, a criminal, but he's not a murderer. He at least had some intention of doing the right thing in the movie.
Ajiona Alexus is a great actress. She nails the role of a teenage girl. I also saw her in Tyler Perry's Acrimony, where she played a different type of character, and nailed that role, so she's not one of those typecast actresses who can only play one role. I hope to see her in more movies.
Avengers: Infinity War (2018)
Long and Boring: Worst movie of 2018 so far
I'm not a fan of Marvel or DC or basically anything that Disney creates. Unfortunately, my friend wanted to see it and I figured:
1) There's a chance it could be good, considering there were other movies I thought were going to be bad, such as(Blockers, The Purge, Keanu, and even Wonder Woman) that turned out to be good, so I shouldn't pass this off right away just because it's Disney
2) I figured it couldn't be worse than Red Sparrow.
Anyway, I was wrong to both of those. This movie is 2 and a half hours of weak plot, little script, visually unappealing CGI, bad acting, and continuous violence.
The only person in this movie who had acting skills was Robert Downy Junior. Benedict Cumberbatch was so insufferable that it's shocking that he's the same person who starred in The Imitation Game, which is one of the best movies I've seen this decade.
The entire last hour was nothing but fighting, killing, and brutal violence. I honestly don't understand how they can get away with rating movies with this much murder PG-13, when movies with significantly less violence and murder, like John Wick and The Hitman's Bodyguard, are rated R. Apparently our backwards society has deemed that killing and violence is an acceptable thing for children to be exposed to, but hearing the word Fvck will traumatize them for life.
With the exception of Robert Downey Junior, the way the people talked reminded me of 11th grade English class when we would read Shakespeare aloud in class. Also, as someone who was forced to go to Catholic Church as a kid, if you've ever gone to the Good Friday or Palm Sunday mass where they all read that dialogue in monotonous voices that's so insufferable you're in pain? That's how I felt in this movie. I would've rather been a child at Good Friday mass again, because at least then there was prospect of a Cream Egg for sitting through that drawl.
Knock Knock (2015)
best 8$ ever spent in my life
I impulse bought this dvd curious as to what a big-name actor like Keanu Reeves was doing in what appeared to be a cheesy horror movie, also because I enjoy cheesy horror movies.
Omg, this movie was definitely not what I expected.
It was not a horror movie. It was a comedy. In fact, aside from the Austin Powers movies, this is probably the funniest thing I ever saw in my life.
The script and acting at the beginning are so bad yet funny including lines like, "If Daddy doesn't work we'll have to live in a box", and "Monster been waiting three weeks", and "I know when I'm married my husband will want to sleep with other woman so I want to get used to having threesomes now."
The comes the crotch-grabbing bubble bath scene, and I was keeled over in hysterics for the rest of the movie.
All the weapons the Bel and Genesis use to torture Evan are household items, such as tying him to a cheap wheely desk chair with an extension cord and gagging him with a pair of underwear. At one point Evan trips over a trolley, and the scene he's tied up with a garden hose and being transported to the backyard by said trolley.
I can't decide between 2 parts as my favourites:
1) The part where Louis is texting at the door and for a split second you see Bel roll Evan tied to the wheely desk chair draped in a sheet by the window, or
2) Where he's neck deep in the group and trying to delete the facebook video of Bel going at him and accidentally hits the Like button.
The fact that this is a remake(meaning someone in 1977 thought it would be a good idea to make a movie about a man getting raped and tortured by two hot babes half his age, and then someone in the 2014 decided this need to me remade for the younger generations made me laugh harder. As did the fact that it somehow stars a big name actor, and that so many people went to see this cuz of John Wick and were greatly enraged by what it was.
I actually made a lot of my friends watch this movie.
Eli Roth truly is an artist.
(also, there's an alternate ending that parodies John Wick for all you people who only went to see this because of John Wick)
Bad Samaritan (2018)
I enjoyed this
I'll be honest, I had never heard of this movie. I went to the movies for the sake of going to the movies and Isle of Dogs wasn't playing for another 3 hours and I'd seen everything else, so I went and saw this.
It has a really good story line. The main character is a criminal, and normally you think of criminals of just overall bad people. But you see that despite being a thief, or what society would call a "bad person" he still has compassion, empathy, and general human decency.
Some of it was a little unrealistic. Such as, if you're a burglar, you're not going to drive a bright orange Volkswagen from 30 years ago, because that's too obvious. Likewise, you're not going to leave someone bloodied and tied up in the back of a Maserati. That's like a $300K car.
I enjoy the ending, because it's not a happy one. The problem gets resolved, but it's not a happy ending at all. It makes you wonder if, while the main character(Sean) was acting out of good and compassion, if it was really worth it given all that happened along the way.
Super Troopers 2 (2018)
They described Quebec pretty well, imo
The movie is made up of stereotype jokes about Quebec, such as them all going to strip clubs, and then Canadian stereotypes about USA such as them drinking watered down beer. It actually seems like they researched what Canada thinks of USA, because it was pretty spot on what we say about Americans up here.
The movie is absolutely hilarious, including them saying English things in Quebec accent to make it sound like something completely else, or them pretending to have a conversation in French by just spewing off every French term used in English to each other to make it look like a conversation, when it's just gibberish.
The only thing that really bothered me was they made a technical error with the Quebec cars by putting licence plates on the front of the cars. Quebec cars only put plates on the back.
Game Night (2018)
Surprisingly good
When I first saw the preview for this movie I thought that they'd turned Clue into a movie, and that it was going to be a horror movie.
To my pleasant surprise, this movie was actually original and pretty funny.
There was a man in the theatre I saw it in just laughing hysterically through the whole movie. It also has a pretty good story-line, which is rare, especially in comedy movies.
Logan Lucky (2017)
So funny
My friend and I went to the movies for the sake of going to the movies for something to do and picked this movie at random.
It was the funniest movie I'd seen all 2017, and one of the funniest movies this decade.
I'm also a big fan of Seth MacFarlane and was not expecting him in this movie.
A Quiet Place (2018)
I was pretty bored.
Far from the worst movie ever, but not great like everyone here is making out to be. It's one of those movies that you'll see and forget about later because nothing in it was significant enough.
The didn't talk. They used sign language sometimes, but not nearly enough for there to be any significant dialogue. Some of the reviews here have more words than this movie.
You don't get a backstory, the story doesn't progress throughout the movie. It starts off with them having to be quiet, but no new developments arise throughout the movie. There isn't really a plot, it's just nothing, with random "shock value" events, like the little boy and the dad getting killed by the alien thingies, but nothing more than that.
I think an hour into it, I was hoping the family would just hurry up and be eaten already, because I couldn't see how else this movie would end.
But then, suddenly, the girl discovers their weakness, and then *poof*, the movie was over.
I did enjoy how short this movie was though.
Burnt (2015)
This is the worst movie I've seen in my life.
I walked out an hour into it and got my money back.
It was in multiple dialogues of English, French, and Italian all at once. The dialogue didn't make sense. One person would say something, and the next person would say something completely unrelated. It's like they were all expressing their thoughts but not having a conversation.
My head felt like it was going to explode. And when 3 years later I saw this DVD for sale at Walmart, I was reminded of how bad this movie and now I have a headache again.
I don't understand how this piece of garbage could have won any reviews. Maybe the pharmaceutical companies paid money to give this money a reward in hopes people would go see it and then have to buy headache medication and antipsychotics to deal with the brain damage of having watching this piece of crap movie.
Wind River (2017)
This is the best movie I've seen this decade
My eyes were glued to the screen for the whole 1.75 hours of this movie. The majority of movies this decade are remakes, or continous superhero movies, political dramas that try too hard and just end up being boring, or action movies that is zero story with a lot of CGI and stuff blowing up.
This movie had an in-depth, complex, twisting plot. You become emotionally connected with all the characters in the movie, feel their rage and their sadness. And it also looks at a very real issue going on in USA and Canada right now that seems to be overlooked.
I was actually enraged that the Oscar for best picture went to The Shape of Water and not this one. I was also enraged that this movie didn't get nominated at all for anything.
Battle: Los Angeles (2011)
I was in pain I was so bored
Title sums up the review.
I saw this in theatres when it came out. I felt like I was watching a video game being played for 2 hours.
At the time it was the worst movie I'd ever seen. Then 7 years later they managed to make a worse movie called Red Sparrow which makes Battle Los Angeles look decent by comparison.
Truth or Dare (2018)
Probably the best movie so far of 2018
The movie is not a masterpiece, and it was not meant to be a masterpiece. So iI'm assuming all the low ratings are from people who were expecting some movie with some complex twisting plot, in depth character development, and a moral.
If like movies that are fast moving, keep you entertained, and has a consistent storyline, you'll like this movie.
The movie was concise and to the point.
Every event in the movie is relevant to the movie. It's flows perfectly from scene to scene.
The ending is a real shocker.
Of the 12 2018 movies I've seen so more, this is the best one.