jpooch00 Reviews

Bob's Burgers (2011– )

Surprisingly terrible!

[1/10 · 12 January 2011]

After all the hype for the last two months, I was expecting something worth watching (at least). What a disappointment! I can't believe that FOX believes that this steaming pile of manure has any business being on their network. Of course, this is the same network that cancelled Futurama so maybe it isn't actually so hard to understand after all.

The storyline and situations are juvenile and totally asinine, the writing is childish and the animation makes South Park look absolutely high tech.

I wasted a half hour of my life watching this drivel - I won't make that mistake again.

House M.D. (2004–2012)

Absolutely the best!

[10/10 · 14 October 2008]

I have to say that "House MD" is the best program currently running on television. To me it's completely different from anything that's ever been made. It's kind of like the "Xena Warrior Princess" series in that it's just completely original in concept and incredibly entertaining EVERY TIME! Also, it's totally addictive and well worth giving in to the craving for more.

The writing, actors, characters, production and everything else are top notch and well done. The cast and background characters seem completely dedicated to making the finest product at all times and they succeed perfectly and admirably. I am also in awe of the writing talent that comes up with some of the funniest zingers I've ever heard.

I don't know what else I can say. If you haven't seen this show yet, you don't know what you're missing!

The Starter Wife (2007)

Waste of time

[1/10 · 14 October 2008]

I sat through the whole first episode just to see if something good might be embedded in this story about some talent-free, self-absorbed, pathetic person who had been sponging off her equally obnoxious and worthless husband while raising her mouthy spoiled brat. Sorry folks, but there just wasn't anything there other than a bunch of catty, narcissistic, cutthroat losers with the usual assortment of tedious neuroses that, for some unfathomable reason, are supposed to be entertaining.

I suspected something was wrong when USA Network began to frantically run their continuous promos for over two months. I've noticed that they will do this whenever they're trying to convince viewers that some piece of cr@p they've spent a lot of money on is actually worth watching. They even ran the promo for the episode that was in progress while it was airing. Pretty sad!

My biggest regret is that my TiVo can't give this awful program more than three "thumbs down". There should be an infinite-number-button for shows like this.

Dragonlance: Dragons of Autumn Twilight (2008 Video)

Great story, horrible execution

[1/10 · 18 January 2008]

I stumbled onto the Dragonlance book series when it was first being published and eagerly looked forward to the release of each new book. I always wondered when some studio would recognize the worth of these stories and make a set of epic films of them. I'm still waiting, folks! I was hoping for something like the "The Lord Of The Rings" series. What was produced in these DVD's ain't that.

There is still the small hope that this awful DVD will spark the interest of some legitimate studio to right this injustice and that they will produce a live action, non-butchered, non-crap version of these awesome tales. I can remember some pretty terrible productions of the "Rings" trilogy back in the day, and look what finally came of that!

I won't rehash the awful animation and lackluster voice talent here. I'm certain that you will see/hear it for yourself. All told, this was an extreme disappointment!

John

American Body Shop (2007)

Very funny!

[10/10 · 11 August 2007]

To me, this is one of the funniest new shows on television. The sight gags and characters, story lines, situations - everything - just comes together and makes for a very amusing and entertaining program format.

I have actually worked in an auto body shop and, let me tell you, some of this stuff is pretty close to reality! The employees and the beautiful receptionist are right on target. The owner is not the usual sleazy character that is usually associated with these kinds of operations, which is a nice departure from the norm. He ends up being more at the mercy of his employees rather than the slave-driving overlord.

The writers surely have some inside experience in the world of auto body repair or they must know someone who does.

Comedy Central has a winner here - if they don't screw it up!

John

Burn Notice (2007–2013)

Surprisingly good

[10/10 · 12 July 2007]

Before bothering to watch this program, see the update at the bottom of this comment!

When I found out that Bruce Campbell was only in a supporting role I thought this was going to be just another USA ripoff. I was wrong.

In this incredibly overworked genre Burn Notice is something refreshingly new. The Mom and her meddling is an inventive twist that adds interest to the stories and the addition of all the beach bunnies running around in the backgrounds of many of the shots is shamelessly flagrant sexism at its finest. The story lines are interesting and the plot twists are acceptably resourceful.

In my opinion, Mr. Campbell should be the lead character but, hey, what do I know? Anyway, I intend to watch every episode. Got a season Pass on the Tivo.

Check it out, I think you'll like it.

Update: July 27, '13. So what's up with that idiotic narration of the scenes? Do they think their viewers are too stupid to interpret what they're seeing? USA has WAY too much coke going up the noses of it's producers or something! Most obnoxious idea they've ever had.

Biggest load of crap ever! I deleted the current episode about ten minutes in and removed Burn Notice from my season pass list. Great show turned to junk by idiots!

Second edit:

The hacks that thought scene narration was a good idea were either fired or locked up (apparently). Anyway, the final episodes (sans the narration), and the especially the final episode, kicked ass bigtime.

Very well done after all!

John

Dirt (2007–2008)

Even worse than its name

[1/10 · 14 January 2007]

Sorry, but this show really is terrible. I'm thinking that the producers believed that putting a beautiful woman in a red dress and giving her the lead would be enough - it ain't even close, folks! Apparently, the writers don't understand the concept of originality. That or they're simply incapable of writing in something other than catch phrases & buzz words.

I suspected something when I started seeing ads about 2 1/2 months before the premier. I've noticed that this usually means they're trying to precondition people to accept a worthless program as something relevant - or even interesting. It didn't work guys.

Hint: produce something that is actually worth watching & you don't have to keep harping about how good it is, the viewers will actually come to that conclusion on their own (a strange concept to some - but true)!

Xena: Warrior Princess (1995–2001)

Best series ever!

[10/10 · 24 November 2006]

To Me, Xena Warrior Princess is the finest series ever produced, period! That's it - the best!

There were always all the sub-story lines, morality (at the end), spirituality, philosophy, sexuality, absolutely total disregard of historical facts or myths, irreverence, reverence (sometimes both, sometimes neither), incredible: cliffhangers, music, writing, casting, costumes, locations, scenery, beautiful camera angles & shots, and most importantly, the apparent devotion of the entire crew, extras & everybody, to making the best product on earth - every time - which, in my opinion, they accomplished incredibly well.

There has never been any series even remotely like it and I can't imagine it ever happening again. All of that concentrated and dedicated talent would be impossible to amass a second time.

I have to admit that the sixth season was a little weak (but only by comparison to the preceding ones), and the final episode totally, embarrassingly sucked, but I still loved the whole thing!

John

Thank You for Smoking (2005)

Awful + 1

[2/10 · 8 November 2006]

I just don't see what people liked about this movie. All I saw was a mega-sleazy man turning his son into yet another one - seemingly with the mother's cooperation? I don't get it. He ends up defending other similar issues and makes more new "friends" in the end. The twist of having the token all-knowing-brat following him around and being oh-so-proud-of-Daddy was just repulsive.

If this was supposed to be about freedom of choice or freedom of speech, it missed the mark. They should come out with a sequil featuring some morality-free jackass arguing for NAMBLA or Nazis in America or something along those lines. That would be "great"!

A Prairie Home Companion (2006)

Absolutely EXCELLENT

[10/10 · 5 November 2006]

This is the best movie I've seen since "Fried Green Tomatoes" and, for me, that's saying a hell of a lot! The characters were so REAL (even though it's a fantasy trip) and I can find nothing negative to say about this film. I had no idea that Ms. Streep could sing like that!! I've watched it 4 times & will certainly do so again many times in the future. It has been many a year since a movie scene caused me to get openly emotional and totally choked-up, but that one near the end really got to me (you'll know it when you see it)! I can't say much of anything else except that I truly regret that the industry doesn't produce more films of this caliber!

Walk the Line (2005)

Extremely disappointing

[3/10 · 25 April 2006]

I don't know if there was something wrong with the DVD that I rented or if the sound for this film is just awful to begin with. I have heard much superior sound on old Three Stooges and Laurel and Hardy shorts. I couldn't understand half of his mumbling dialog - but that may have been for the best! To be accurate, though, the horrible sound in this movie about music was the least of the problems with it.

The only bright spot for me was Reese Witherspoon's performance and that was illuminated only by the incredibly awful rest-of-the-movie! One thing this film did do for me was to verify what I had suspected all along - that Johnny Cash was no more than a self-serving, irresponsible, marginally talented, drug-addicted hack. I suppose that's to be expected in most high-end entertainers, but he displayed it in spades!! The character inspired no sympathetic feelings in me whatsoever. His many problems and trials were brought on by his own stupid, self destructive actions.

Anyway, I returned the DVD & received credit for the rental price. To me, it was a total piece of junk! John

War of the Worlds (2005)

Terrible

[1/10 · 23 November 2005]

What a total letdown! In my opinion, the only really good part was when the aliens finally got that mouthy brat! Too bad she and her moronic brother survived. And what about all that politically correct "parenting" in the middle of the apparent destruction of mankind? Ridiculous! Completely unrealistic civilian crowd reactions during action scenes - running TOWARD the most violent confrontations etc. Absolute junk! This movie put me in mind of David Lynch's "Dune". Completely missed the opportunity to make an exceptional film, opting instead for a tedious piece of drivel! Tom Cruise seemed to be playing himself as he actually is - an ignorant, opinionated, untalented, white trash punk! Cordially, JP