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Reviews
Invasion (2021)
Yawn...
Mostly filler with unnecessary characters (the sheriff, the ridiculous American general), long and pointless character developments and, as others have pointed out, few aliens and a lackluster ending with no real clarity. And if hydrochloric acid will kill them, why was it never used? The premise for appearing to overcome the aliens was unbelievable- a race capable of traveling across the universe, terraforming etc. Is incapable of protecting themselves from a single nuclear strike? Not good thinking as it turns out. The final scene was sadly lacking- did the writers and actors simply tire themselves out or just become bored by it all.
Don't bother.
The Watcher (2022)
Started poorly, continued to worsen, died a slow, lingering death
The is yet another of the old tried (and tired)-and-rarely-true streaming outlets formula series- a "B", at best, actor, a "C" actor and a bunch of has-beens and never-weres. The neighbors are total jerks from the very beginning, Dad tries too hard in his acting and too little to save his job and family. Mother, the pottery maker- yeah. Of course it was absolutely necessary for the daughter to maliciously "out" her father as a racist and cost the family their future. Of course Dad would hire a single-person security company and pay $7,000 to a 19 year-old without the sense to present anything close to a professional appearance. Of course the Black dude was trying to "become established in that area" by fooling with a 16 year-old and not attempting to present a business appearance. And how many more of these cheesy series can Margo Martindale have time for? And why is anybody hiring Jennifer Coolidge for anything?
Very lazy acting, poor writing, sloppy directing and anything else to make this the worst tv presentation I've seen all year.
12 Strong (2018)
Silly from beginning to end
Pretty Boy Flavor of the Month leads his band of brave heroes against the evil and cruel stone-age enemy. The patriotic chirping are old and stale- the story simplistic and dull as can be. I'm so glad the Taliban AND Al-Qaeda were so easily defeated by the brave American troops. A shame this didn't have the effect of preventing this country's wasted twenty years. Usual patriotic mumblings re: 9/11 and terrorists...
The End (2020)
Decent, but could have been better if...
It had not been necessary to gratuitously check all the sexuality boxes. This trend is becoming tiresome particularly when, as here, most of the sexual spectrum added nothing to the story. Just there to be there and keep as many groups as possible placated.
The kids needs some serious discipline. Oberon is an over-indulged, self-centered, spoiled teen by a mother unwilling to set limits. Agree and indulge- not a great parenting model.
Assisted suicide is an important subject. My body, my life- nobody, especially the guvment, has the power to control what I wish to inhale, inject, smoke or in any other manner introduce any substance I choose to use- or to determine the time of my passing from this miserable world. Medicinal or recreational. From that perspective, the series presents a valid argument.
The Lie (2018)
Idiotic
The Lie effectively sums up this entire movie. Mom- no need to bother with the actor's name- is a third rate imitation of Nicole Kidman- wooden, blank, just plain awful. The plot was thin at best, the ending worse.
Overall a waste of time.
Crisis (2021)
Just plain silly
Nancy Reagan with her simple-minded and simplistic "Just Say No" campaign would have been proud of this silly tripe. Throughout the movie the term "oxy" is repeatedly used- with just enough references to oxycodone to insure the true culprit- oxycontin along with the Purdue crime family- wouldn't be referenced. Great way to avoid a lawsuit- silly way to make a movie. The evil drug kingpin was a weak caricature with a ridiculous name. Hero Mom and Crooked Cop ride to the rescue to somehow bring the drug em[ire to its knees. Hero Mom's kid is murdered for reasons too stupid to discuss. Crooked Cop, failing to conduct an effective bust, becomes an accessory to murder in the final closing minutes of this silliness. The research professor, after serving as the drug company's long-term lackey suddenly develops a conscience, is blackballed and, in an unexplained turn of events, comes out on top at the end. Gary Oldman is better than this.
After struggling through the awful performances, poorly written script and wooden direction, I was ready for an opioid or twelve. May an oxy- codone, of course, so as not to offend the Purdues.
Homeland (2011)
Covid boredom is the only reason to watch
Awful from just about every perspective. So much of this series is just plain ridiculous beginning with the idea that a bipolar person, on-and-off medication, erratic at best would ever be employed by the CIA. Or that she would be retained in that employment after the substantial breaches of protocol and security which occur frequently throughout this nonsense.
I did learn that the best way to blend in while attempting to slip a tail to avoid detection- especially in the Middle East- is by tucking bleach blonde hair partially under a hijab and make sure to constantly turn to look behind.
Also the best way to persuade others to my point of view is to huff and puff, go wide-eyed while tearing up and throwing in a chin quiver for good effect. This is the sure-fire way to get your boss to agree to anything and everything.
A good portion of each episode was occupied by filler scenes- i.e.- when Brody is in Caracas there's an 80 second scene in which he has his head shaved. Another irritating feature is Carrie's non-stop and continuous sighing. That's right up there with the inevitable chin quiver.
Season Six finally saw a change of clothes from the painfully awful nylon pant suit which seemed to be Carrie's only clothing option for the previous five seasons.
I pushed to get to the end of this awful, silly mess.
The Girl in the Spider's Web (2018)
Stick with the original (Swedish version)
The original "Girl" trilogy was top-notch. There was no reason for Hollywood to lay hands on a far-superior production. The result is the horrible stench created by the Daniel Craig travesty or this much better, but still out-matched second movie. I could never make it through the idiotic Craig movie though I did try more than once. This was at least watchable.
It's inevitable that any truly good movie will become, if not plain garbage, then only a few steps above it when Hollywood releases the inevitable remake. In an industry that seems capable of consistently only pumping out romcoms, superhero and mind-numbing action movies, a truly exceptional film has become a true rarity. This was not that.
Hand of God (2014)
Typical streaming series
The formula has become stale. One B actor- maybe very low A in this case- surrounded by a cast of unknowns and B/C actors. The Bobo character was a typical portrayal of the loyal sidekick with an idiotic nickname.
Not worth the time.
The Man in the High Castle (2015)
Absurdly awful
This series, like so many others on Netflix, Amazon and other streaming services, follows the model of lumping a cast of shared B and C actors together in the hopes of magically finding a decent cast. It doesn't work here either. The Juliana character was wooden and lacked any degree of believability. The other cast members were not much better. But hey, at least the series checked all- every single one- of the diversity boxes with the most ludicrous being the Qualls character. Beyond that, the storyline was predictable and mostly boring. A decent first season became a little worse with each year with a series finale fit for the sloppy work overall. It's a shame because Phillip K. Dick's work was truly exceptional. There will be more of these series featuring the shared pool of substandard actors. BTW, it wouldn't hurt to cut the gratuitous sex and fake smoking scenes. They do nothing more than distract while only adding to an already padded script. I found myself fast-forwarding through pointless scenes more frequently each season.
Tin Star (2017)
Pure garbage
Arson- twice, kidnapping, assault, aggravated assault, assault of a cop w/ a deadly weapon- i.e.- aggravated assault, torture, abuse of power, burglary of a habitation- three, four times, extortion, blackmail, aggravated trespass, murder. And these are only the crimes committed by the "good guys".
Acting is awful, plot is moronic, script dull and repetitious, directing non-existent, characters either wooden or grotesquely unbelievable. Another cable-type quickie which features a recognized talent and a bunch of pool sorta-actors who are passed around from series to series to- what, save money? Gagnon was just one example- also featured in AMC's Hell On Wheels to much the same non-effect. A naked bald guy sitting on a toilet preening in front of a mirror hardly presents the image of a fearsome bad guy. And the supposed-to-be Swedish accent again.
While the mother is awful, at least the daughter is putrid beyond description. Way too much film wasted on lingering facial shots with no real point to these scenes. Characters- all of them- constantly behave inconsistently. My favorite was the whiny sheriff's deputy who, after being shot in the kneecap (though described by his female counterpart as a "glancing blow to the knee"- whatever the ____ that means), doesn't follow up with a formal complaint, no arrest warrant, nothing other than a constant stream of whining all the while wondering why his deputy girlfriend "doesn't love him".
The basic premise of the series is beyond ludicrous: Daddy, while an undercover cop, shacks up with future child killer's mommy, cop is found out by some undefined criminal enterprise and is forced to abandon mommy and future child killer, mommy is so broken-hearted and dejected she drinks to the point of suffering from "wet brain" (whatever that is), ten years later future child killer and his two Brit criminal friends somehow locate and follow crooked cop who broke mommy's heart to a remote corner of Alberta to exact a convoluted revenge plot which one of the criminal buddies describes as a duty of honor. This piece of garbage begins stupidly and far surpasses all expectations for the steaming pile of horse fertilizer that it is. BTW, I forced myself to sit through the entire first season and four episodes of the second. There is no redeeming quality to this drivel.
Same Kind of Different as Me (2017)
Trapped- again
Silly good overcomes all suffering and defeats all evil. A previous reviewer made the statement of 'two Forth Worths"- the rich and the poor and that's exactly how this movie presents every aspect of the story. Good, evil- no in-between. Mindless drivel poorly acted with silly plot lines. "I'm so sorry." "About?" "Your diagnosis as terminal." "Nobody told me that." Exchange between heroic white woman savior of the poor and downtrodden and her physician's wife. And so on...
PLEASE develop a new rating- C for christian drivel works for me. At least I can then skip the movie.
Hacksaw Ridge (2016)
Not sure I see the difference
I'm not sure I see the difference between self-defense and relying on another for defense of self in order to complete an assigned mission. Yes, the actions of Doss were heroic, but could he have accomplished what he did without a soldier with a gun beside his side doing the killing for him? And if that's the case, what's the difference? The Japanese soldier is not any less dead no matter who pulled the trigger and Private Doss is no less involved in the death of that soldier than if he had pulled the trigger. Is the soldier who pulled the trigger on Doss' behalf more morally stained by the act of killing for another? Perhaps less so since he stepped forward to perform a necessary evil when another would not. The movie tries to make all of this a black and white morality issue and it is so far from that.
Did Doss really have the luxury of not eating meat on the WWII battlefield? I found this movie frustrating for several reasons. The lengthy buildup to combat was unnecessary and seemed forced in order to add length to the movie.
13 Reasons Why (2017)
Thirteen reasons why an extremely unlikable narcissistic little girl kills herself
Actually I don't know why- and the series didn't present a clear answer. As I progressed through each episode, I grew to intensely dislike Hanna, Clay and Tony. The incessant whining of all the characters was unbearable and made for One Reason Why I needed to finish this piece of garbage as quickly as possible.
The idiotic bandage/cut on Clay's head to remind us we were in the present was ridiculous and just another huge annoyance in the series.
Hannah was a completely unsympathetic character. When did this country become a collection of lame, excuse-making, whining blamers? If these are the people who will be in charge some day, we have no chance and may as well join Poor Little Hannah in the bathtub with a razor. Where are the parents in this mess? Had my son talked to and behaved toward me in the manner the spoiled brats of the completely ineffective parents, he would be scraping himself off the floor.
No redeeming value for this series. It's a Whine Fest with no substance.
Iron Fist (2017)
Truly one of the most awful attempts at entertainment ever
I didn't read the comics because- well, I'm not 12 any longer. However, this was pure idiocy with horrid acting, uninteresting characters, non-existent character development and some of the worst storytelling I've ever seen attempted.
SPOILERS It's hard to spoil what is already a rotting rat's carcass, but there were so many scenes that were contradictory or unbelievable that this became more of a comedy than anything else. Thank goodness I could fast forward through endless, repetitive, boring fight scenes. There's not a great need to vividly dissect every idiotic mistake in this atrocity. The final fight scene with Undead Daddy pretty much summarizes the whole thing. So, on one hand the Iron Fist- who we are told is a very good fighter even without his Magic Hand- is pretty soundly beaten by Undead Daddy until helps arrives in the knick of time. Our heroes then attempt to return to K' un Lun which, most surprisingly, no longer exists since its primary guardian took off to Earth to amble around until he was finally told who killed his mommy and daddy.
Iron Fist, raised by monks and taught the usual monkian nonsense, has no trouble adjusting to the billionaire's lifestyle with an Aston Martin and luxury NY apartment. I was amused by the obligatory "namaste" on at least one occasion. Apparently the poor, bitter orphaned Iron Fist didn't quite measure up despite all the training and travails of achieving Protector of the Universe status since he could never identify a real villain even with a sign hung around the character's neck reading, "I am a villain- I want you dead- I will do everything possible to kill you." Just plain stupid.
Namaste.
The Americans: Darkroom (2017)
Yawn.....
Another in this season's never-ending Paige Whine-A-Thon. All very disappointing from what had been a very good series. This season is totally forgettable with Paige being the least interesting and most irritating character of all. Her forever "all me" attitude has grown tiresome. This season can't end soon enough. All other plot lines have ended in a total dead end. With three episodes remaining anything done to push the story forward will only be forced. If Season Six is to follow, the writers must go back to the formula of Seasons 1-4. PLEASE, get rid of the Paige character in any believable way as soon as possible.
Warcraft (2016)
Wow, this was really horrible
What's the deal with the tusks? Any species which has advanced to the point of speech, development of tools, etc. would have shed any detrimental or useless physiological feature. The tusks were quite simply beyond idiotic- how did these things drink a glass of water? Beyond that, the "acting" was horrible, the story simple-minded, plots holes too many to count, so many ripoffs of the Vikings series (shield walls, really) poor CGI- all over-presented in a 2+ hour movie which could have been easily done in 90 minutes.
This is typical of the poor quality movies now regularly passed off as entertainment. It's a shame this is what movie-making has come to.
The Americans (2013)
Great until now- Season Five
The 3 rating is for Season Five- prior to this sleeper of a season I rated the series a strong 8. The Americans was one of the very few series that had been worth watching each week and looking forward to the next season. Vikings, GoT, Fargo and Saul are the only other current series I feel are in the same category. Sadly The Americans has suffered a severe decline in story line with the gross overemphasis of the Paige character. Paige's constant whining has dragged the series down and making her story central has substantially degraded the quality of the series. With any luck at all the season will end with Paige meeting an unfortunate demise which will then allow the series to get back on track. There has been little plot movement over this season. I hope the series gets back on track by focusing away from an extraordinarily boring character.
Wallander (2008)
Save your time, watch the Swedish version
There's no reason to waste a lot of time or space reviewing this pathetically silly crime series. English actors with pronounced English accents and slang portraying Swedish characters in Sweden produces an amazingly absurd result. I'm pleased I watched the Swedish version of this series first or I may never have after slogging through three episodes of English Kurt Wallander. Not only that, but this version of Wallander is horribly inept- just when you expect him to ask a key question of a witness, he either gazes into space, mumbles something incoherent and trudges off or is interrupted to answer his cell and- apparently unable to handle more than a single task- never follows through with the all-important question.
Three and done. As I said, skip this and go for the Swedish version- there is no comparison.
Hacksaw Ridge (2016)
Not sure I see the difference
I'm not sure I see the difference between self-defense and relying on another for defense of self in order to complete an assigned mission. Yes, the actions of Doss were heroic, but could he have accomplished what he did without a soldier with a gun beside his side doing the killing for him? And if that's the case, what's the difference? The Japanese soldier is not any less dead no matter who pulled the trigger and Private Doss is no less involved in the death of that soldier than if he had pulled the trigger. Is the soldier who pulled the trigger on Doss' behalf more morally stained by the act of killing for another? Perhaps less so since he stepped forward to perform a necessary evil when another would not. The movie tries to make all of this a black and white morality issue and it is so far from that.
Did Doss really have the luxury of not eating meat on the WWII battlefield? I found this movie frustrating for several reasons. The lengthy buildup to combat was unnecessary and seemed forced in order to add length to the movie.
Wallander (2005)
Final season
I was disappointed overall with the manner in which the final six episodes of the series brought about the end of Kurt Wallander. I have had firsthand experience dealing with the condition (my mother) and it was not presented in a believable manner. It just seemed as though Henriksson didn't give ample notice of his intent not to return and the writers threw together a fast resolution without much thought. A simple execution with that crime being the last of the series to be solved would have been better.
Otherwise, overall a decent series though I don't think I would ever travel to Ystad or anywhere close as it must be the residence of every Scandinavian criminal. As is usual for this type of series, the crime rate in whatever locale is higher than that of Chicago or Cleveland and, at some point, requires the viewer to ignore previous episodes in order to attain some level of believability.