Change Your Image
moviebuffmel90
Lists
An error has ocurred. Please try againReviews
Demonic Toys: Jack-Attack (2023)
Decent gore for a too short B-Movie
Much like with the Puppet Master franchise, Demonic Toys has entered the spin off era with different characters getting their own feature. Baby Oppsie was a surprise hit and now we get Jack-Attack. The premise alone is find for this type of feature, but admist decent gore, something feels missed.
The plot involves a mute girl that moves in with a foster family after a traumatic moment. Among her possessions she carries is a toy Jack in the Box with the killer creature named Jack Attack. Once unleased, the evil clown monster hits the family one by one in scenes where the gore is not too bad. However, the staging in some of them feels rather off. One character is tripped in the woodchipper and gets automatically sliced to goo. That would be a fine kill it was shot well enough. Another involves an anvil that is kind of creative, but I do feel like more damage could have been done than scratching someone's face off.
I am not too hard on the performances given this is a low budget B movie. Everyone is tying to make the material work and the dark tone is consistent throughout. However, earlier in the year, Subspecies V raised the bar so easily that I wondered if Full Moon's quality would improve.
Yet, I guess it's quick 59 minute in and out motif is not going away soon. I feel like these are interesting ideas if it took the time to perfect the kills or let alone atmosphere. Doctor Death had the quick approach, but that worked for how well the scenes were staged and the impact the deaths left. I guess if you want a fast moving feature, this is your game. Yet a small tease near the end does leave me wondering where else this could go...
The Twelve Slays of Christmas (2022)
Holiday Clip Show
When I heard Full Moon was doing a Christmas movie, I was curious and the premise sounded interesting. Three people lost on the way and run into the leering dwelling of an old creepy man who tells tales.
However, viewer beware, it's a clip show that showcases the best kills of the Full Moon filmography. I should be annoyed, but "clip show" features are something they have done before. If you see it as a "best of" compilation, you will be fine. Dare I say, it ser ves as a nice intro to those unfamiliar with Full Moon Features. You get a rough idea of their franchises and how they are.
So, my rating more or less reflects the entertainment value of the wraparound segments. They are well shot and enjoyable, but the trailers masquerade it as a fresh new film when it's not. For 40 minutes, it's a collection of classic kills in the clothing of a Christmas movie. This studio has come a long way with creating a collection of unique characters and creatures to the point one wonders why a clip show and why now. I would have loved to see them make a Christmas movie instead. Only recommend for die hard enthusiasts. Outside of that, watch Trancers this Christmas season instead.
Puppet Master: Doktor Death (2022)
Decent entry with gory kills and good make-up
Doktor Death comes in the line of Full Moon movies that try to achive Charles Band's theme of making his studio the "Marvel Comics" of the 1990s. Horror features that have a comic book tone with the prospect of future crossovers. The last movies that came out this year have been hit and miss. But with this latest spin off, I can make an exception.
The killer Doktor is let loose in a senior living home as working nurses try to figure out what's going on. This entry can be described best as the original movie but set in a nursing home. It offers a good amount of characters that sound interesting on paper. A painter that creates predicting art, a guy who binges on old VHS tapes of the Subspecies movies, a mute woman that knows what's going on and so forth. The only one that nearly ruins it is a pervy old rich man who aims to pinch the rumps on the workers. Thankfully, that doesn't get focused on and it does lead to a kill that was hilaious.
The gore effects are a mixed bag. Some of the kills are standard while others are a bit creative. There's a suspensful scene that involves a laundry room with the bedsheets hanging over and floating like ghosts. That's enough to tell me there is some effort for a low budget affair. The special effects with the killer doll refect the nature on how the kills are staged. As the movie goes on, they do get better. Especially for one particular moment that I can't give away which I thought was impressive.
As said before, this has been a hit and miss year for Full Moon Features. From giant women to fish creatures with jaw-boobs, Doktor Death really tries to bring back the old feel of what Full Moon did. It has a Creepshow vibe that is unique and doesn't go too dark with its premise. I can't say this is the best of the Puppet Master films, but its entertaining enough. How can I complain when we have a senior home that has issues of Fangoria?
On a side note, the movie ends on a cliffhanger that does suggest something. My prediction is that we will get a set of solo features on some of the puppets. We already have one on Blade, so why not? If this is the direction things will go, I'm open to it.
Giantess Battle Attack (2022)
Big women, small entertainment
I gave the first movie a light pass. "Attack of the 50 Foot Camgirl" was no masterpiece, but it was a nice campy throwback to the 1950s giant flicks. It was fun, dumb, but it knew what it wanted to be. This sequel does have some improvments, but it feels greatly rushed out. In doing so, it feels like a jumbled mess.
Ivy Smith is back as Beverly and she is one of the few things good about this movie. The plot tries to be a Rocky II style movie as the giant lady is reduced to working at a rock quary due to the damage from the last movie. She is paired with a new boyfried and I admit, the chemistry is somewhat sweet. It's nice to see her with someone good natured, whereelse the last movie was more about fame going to one's head.
However, the rest of the movie is a pure mess from there. A manager for a fighter, who is connected to a character from the last movie, seeks revenge by trying to get a fight started with a fighter named Anna ...Conda...who plans to make her big to even up the score.
This movie tries way too hard to be a comedy as oppsed to letting the jokes speak for themselves. The last movie at least had character building humor surrounded by visual jokes that worked for the scene like cocktails made with garbage bins. Here, the sake of story is tossed out the window as we partake in pure slapstick and verbal comedy that doesn't quite land. Highlights include scientsits naming an case "Experiment 69" and relishing with laughter. And moments later, a hot dog apparently whimpers and runs off. I wish I was making this up.
A last minute subplot arrives in the form of a giant alien who comes from a planet that looks like a pair of giant boobs who seeks to conquer Earth and defeat Beverly. However, it is all a little too late as the giant warrior arrives for the final 10 minutes giving a far too brief fight that is not well choreographed and leaves little to be desired.
The only step up is that comapred to "Piranha Women" is that is has a beginning, middle, and end. There's good ideas here and I believed the chemistry of the two leads. Where it falls flat is the Rocky style plot and neverending buffet of jokes that will make one groan more as each joke falls flatter and flatter. And it doesn't help when the highlight of your humor is the boss of the rock quarrey offering sexual pleasure by means of a power tool. How humorous...how...uterrly....humorous...
Maybe I'm soft on this one given it is going straight to streaming. But with Subspecies V and Doktor Death on the horizon, one expects some form of entertainment from an absurd feature like this. I understand B movies like this don't have a high budget, but I don't think there was enough to go all out on this one. It's shortcommings show in the minatures and less said about the CGI, the better. I can forgive the poor effects if the script had a decent story and good jokes to pair it with. All we are left with is wasted potential and the hope they never make a Giantess 3. The lesson to learn here is just because the boobs are big, they do not equal a good time.
Piranha Women (2022)
Good Idea But Gets Soggy Near The End
Coming from the director of Beverly Hills Vamp, it's an improvement, but that's only saying so much. There is a good idea here with a mad doctor creating fish hybrid females. I just the drama was mixed in better.
There are seeds of a good concept with the protagonist's girlfriend ending up with the inhabitants and the boyfriend trying to figure out what is going on. The biggest mistake is how it focuses too much on the boyfriend. If more time was devoted to the other characters, I think this would have been a solid B movie. Unfortunately, Piranha Women takes off right when it begins to end. And once it ends, we feel a damp and unsatisfied conclusion. I feel it would have been better to take a cue from Joe Dante's The Howling. A much better movie about a secret society of monsters hiding in a world. This could have reached those heights if only more focus was placed on the other unique elements plugging into it.
The Looney Tunes Show (2011)
Not "Looney" enough for television
I grew up with the Looney Tunes all my life. The original shorts were quick, packed with a laugh a second, and brilliantly written. But when I saw the first episode, I felt something was wrong. The jokes were dead pan unfunny, the designs were too fluffy, and the overall execution was just boring. Each time a frame passed by, I felt something churning in my stomach, as if the laughter in me was dying slowly.
This take of "sitcom-ing" Bugs and pals just doesn't fit their quota. I felt they were taking the "Family Guy" route too far and just seemed unoriginal. We've seen this before with The Drew Carey Show (the idea of having odd ball friends and trying to live a normal life in an insane world), Norm, and Ren & Stimpy. Just not with the Looney Tunes. All I ask is for Cartoon Network to listen up and reconsider what they have done or at least improve things in Season 2. That is there will not be one; pray to that. I say, skip it and purchase the Gold Collection sets. In due time, nothing will live up to the wit and charm of a duck and rabbit arguing over what hunting season it is.