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Reviews
Ha'Kha'ver Ha'Sha'men Shelli (2022)
A non adaptation of an adaptation of when Harry met Sally
Ok so if 'When Harry Met Sally' had a mentally disturbed ugly cousin, and that cousin ran away from home, got hooked on meth, joined a cult, married a horse, fell off a ladder while working on the roof of the horse's barn, was rushed into hospital where they accidentally gave him a pre-frontal lobotomy, and he then became the mayor of Tel Aviv, this would be that film.
The makers of this film, who essentially just shamefully took the script from 'When Harry Met Sally' and ran it through ChatGPT asking for some minor adjustments, had something with potential but decided to cross the line from charming and sophisticated to cliche and unbelievable.
The leading (or supporting - who knows) character, Jimmy, on top of being obese (not just overweight), is an unambiguous lazy pot head who desperately wants to be loved, and happens to read books (which you can easily do when you have infinite time), while the gorgeous leading (or supporting - who knows) female character who struggles to find a man, is a sharp, successful, book lover, who, we are meant to believe, is destined to end up with the guy. It all just doesn't gel well enough because the details on screen don't support the idea due to a lack of character building and an unbelievable plot.
Pieces of a Woman (2020)
Good performance. weak story
The performances are good enough to keep you there watching, and the birth seen is well done in terms of how much time was invested into it. After that it tries but fails to juggle grief, some ridiculous legal preceding, and nonsense agendas expressed by supporting characters. The problem with juggling those three things is there isn't enough of an exploration into the two main characters. There's no nuance. It's just a surface level 'then we were happy and now we are said' mono tale. You're left wanting to know a lot more about the ups and downs and interactions with life that follow the traumatic experience but instead you get regurgitating sadness and an unbelievably lame ending.
4 metà (2022)
Avoid this nonsense
Terrible. Badly written and directed making it confusing and annoying at the same time. No depth. Cliché people with cliche lines engineering a cliche store. Italian cinema doesn't enjoy the luxury of big money usually and the studios decided to invest it in junk like this. Ridiculous.
Archive 81 (2022)
Could have been good but..
This starts off winning your interest somewhat as the concept is somewhat nicely developed (if you're into this sort of thing), but the acting is just terrible. The lead actress is over-acting at every point. She is in a state of permanent distress when she doesn't need to be, which is exhausting. Everyone and everything else in this is a cliche of a cliche wrapped in a cliche and served on bed of cliches. I had to give up at some point as it became unbearable.
I'm Thinking of Ending Things (2020)
A thought inside a thought in Kaufman's anxiety
Imagine if Kaufman took acid and then thought up a character, and then that character took mushrooms and had an idea, and then that idea became a hand and wrote a pamphlet on dementia, and then a computer scrambled that pamphlet into a poem, and then a toilet paper designer came across that poem and designed it into toilet paper so that it repeats over and over and over on each sheet, and then a director starts reading it while using the facilities but becomes convinced that the whole roll of toilet paper is his dead uncle communicating with him, and then he creates a film based on the toilet paper which he decides shall not be edited. That is this.
Generation Wealth (2018)
Ignore the fake reviews
There are a ton of very obviously bought and paid for reviews which mislead you into thinking this is a masterpiece. It isn't. It's a bad documentation of an otherwise interesting topic that deserves a more sophisticated and less self serving approach. The filmmaker claims there's 25 years of material on the subject yet she fills half the documentary with off-topic snippets of her own life. Wealth is never really looked at here. What you see is some corners of our world where excess is the new order but that doesn't say much about the role of wealth in society. There's also a terrible academic interviewed throughout the documentary who vomits over-simplified apocalyptic nonsense as images of people pouring champaign over asses go by. Rubbish. The most unfortunate thing about wealth these days is that it can be channeled to paying for fake reviews about this junk. Avoid.
You (2018)
Unrealistic, shallow, and stupid
It starts off promising but then just degenerates into shallow badly written trash. There's no way this garbage can have a score of 8 on IMDB without manipulation. The main character, Joe, is interesting at first but then it's clear the writers of this catastrophe run out of ideas. As for the other character (Beck), she's just a shallow cliche portrayed by a terrible actor. I'm killing this on episode 4 which is when the writers decided for no reason to tweak the style so you have to hear the incessant noise in both the characters heads. The one request for the director is to make Joe engage in a killing spree which takes out Beck, all her buddies, the kid, and polishes it off with him pulling the trigger on himself
Serial Killer with Piers Morgan (2017)
Piers is such a bad interviewer that you almost start sympathizing with the killers
Terrible. Piers Morgan simply doesn't have the skills to interview these people. He is a former tabloid journalist who then went on to do a breakfast show on British TV. All he knows is sensationalism and his attempt to recreate it here is a colossal failure. His interviewing technique (not that there is one) is so annoying that you can't watch the show. He doesn't listen, doesn't give the interviewees an opportunity to speak, repeats the same thing over and over, doesn't apply any thought to what he is doing. It's one big bowl of bad journalism. Avoid.
Homecoming (2018)
Starts off interesting then becomes tremendously boring
When suspense is stretched over too long a time it loses its appeal. That's what happens in this series.
Essentially it should have been a long feature film rather than a whole tv series.
Julie Roberts has only one facial expression for every emotion during the course of the series which is a bit ridiculous.
Despite that it's good enough for anyone wanting to binge content because there's nothing better to do.
Deadpool 2 (2018)
Gotta see this film if just for the comic lines
All the comic one liners here are great. If you don't get that kind of comedy you won't like the movie but if you do you'll enjoy this a lot. The story isn't relevant. It's whatever and it's just there to provide a platform for the comedy so don't expect a cinematic masterpiece
The Investigator: A British Crime Story (2016)
disappointing
Unfortunately there are no new discoveries made on the cases presented and pretty poor investigative work in attempting to do so. But that's show biz.
One annoying thing about the way this is made is that the same things are repeated over and over again to stretch out tv time.
Apart from that and the fake wrapping, the history of the cases itself is interesting I guess
Succession (2018)
Waste of time
I watched the first season of this nonsense. It's bad. Every character is a stupid, annoying, and unlikable cliche. There is nothing sophisticated in the plot and sub-plots. Nothing seems developed correctly here and due to the terrible writing behind it all. I don't even want to get into the list of things that don't make sense throughout the series.. there are so many.
I guess the only good thing to say is that some of the direction and acting is decent.. maybe. Anyway don't watch it
Alaska (2015)
A beautiful love story
I'm not exactly sure what it is about this film that I like so much but It absolutely captured me and made me fall in love with both characters as much as they do with each other.
At first there was something somewhat unbelievable about their interaction but as the film goes on the magic of this connection is revealed through a tense story that takes us from Paris to Milan.
The acting, direction, production, and writing is brilliant and I think it truly succeeds in achieving that balance of thought, emotion, and entertainment that makes for good cinema.
This is probably one of those films I'll watch at least once a year. If you're into the style and genre, passing on it would be an injustice.
Ghostbusters (2016)
What kind of an idiot let Paul Feig and Katie Dippold write this film?
This crap is too much. After watching this garbage I felt like someone urinated on my childhood (a safe place where Ghostbusters was admired as fantastic cinema).
Go ahead and search Paul Feig (director and writer) and Katie Dippold (writer) and you'll figure out in two seconds that these clowns should never have been allowed to go near this film.
The acting sucks, the plot sucks, the editing sucks, the effects suck, the casting sucks, the attempt to do role reversal sucks, the directing sucks, the writing sucks, the staging sucks.
The only good thing in this film is the few seconds you get to see Bill Murry on screen.
I'm actually sorry I watched this because now my beloved memory of Ghostbusters is tarnished
Below Her Mouth (2016)
A real pile of garbage
I originally gave this movie 3 stars but after further consideration downgraded to a 1. This film is so bad it deserves a review. The film centers around a total douche bag lesbian (Dallas) who, without any charm, character, or color, manages to seduce a snobby shallow strait girl (Jasmin) who is engaged to a man (Who we never really get a chance to know because he has only a handful of lines in the film).
The acting is terrible, the direction sucks, the script is horribly written, the editing was done by a monkey, and the settings are poorly made.
None of the characters are developed in any way so you don't really understand why the two leads fall for each other. The film has almost no men in it as well and when there are men, they are portrayed as assholes of course (the director 'April Mullen' is clearly upset about something).
Don't waste your time on this film
2:22 (2017)
What garbage
This terribly compiled, terribly acted, terribly edited, and terribly scripted nonsense was so bad that it actually made me laugh.
The film starts off promising despite the bad acting from an Australian cast putting on poor American accents. However it quickly plummets on all levels as the film reveals it's unimaginative twists to the sound of never-ending background music and what feels like the production style usied in a commercial for Qantas.
There is so much madness here that you really feel the director has completely lost touch with reality and has taken the cast down with him. Avoid at all costs
Life (2017)
Nothing sophisticated here
What an utter waste of budget, resources, and actors. This is a complete regurgitation of 'every one dies' boring been-done-a-billion-times sci-fi. Nothing sophisticated offered to the audience, nothing to think about, nothing to tickle the imagination. Just your run of the mil monster-on-board movie script template with a few little tweaks.
Here are some things that you can do instead of seeing this film:
1. Sleep 2. Stare at an ashtray and try moving it with your mind 3. Gargle gasoline
Your Highness (2011)
Great movie that's way underrated
'Your Highness' falls into that genre of shock comedy which is hard to pull off usually but the film kept me laughing throughout with its outstanding fusion of fantasy and comedy. When you sit to watch it you're not expecting an Oscar winner so I think all the low ratings and harsh critic reviews it got are totally out of context. For lovers of the genre this is a must and has a good cast to hold it. Danny McBride and James Franco bounce off each other well and Justin Theroux delivers a hilarious performance as the villain. If you liked other films that orbit around the James France/Danny McBride crew such as 'This is the end' and 'The Interview' you'll like this flick.