dcnilsen Reviews

The Humanity Bureau (2017)

very low budget...but thats not the worst part

[3/10 · 2 September 2018]

The single word that best describes this "movie" is...ludicrous...It has all the look and feel of a 1970s Pilot episode for a tv series that never made it into production...The dialogue is particularly bad and the attempt to make it a futuristic endeavor is completely demolished by the extensive use of normal automobiles...So many holes it is not even worth naming all of them...and if all that isn't bad enough, a terrible ending....worthless really

Five Grand (2016)

low budget-high drama

[10/10 · 18 April 2017]

it seems this movie is one that almost nobody has seen...and that is a real shame, because despite the obvious low budget, it is a western masterpiece of making the most out of the least available...another reviewer says you might be bored waiting for something to happen..did he watch the same movie??..the main character, a thief who robbed gold from a train with his brothers, goes from one circumstance to another in the film, and all of these situations end with someone being killed...I don't call that boring...it is surprisingly realistic and pay close attention to the sound track because the movies music is brilliant...I have now watched this film 4 times, and it gets better each time...I rank it one of my all time favorite westerns....and I think you will too...check it out on youtube...this movie is a classic as far as I am concerned...and I don't play games when it comes to rating movies

Split (IX) (2016)

typical unbelievable nonsense

[2/10 · 9 April 2017]

first of all, what in the name of god is this movie doing with a 7.4 rating????...it supports my contention that you cant judge any movie by its rating on this site as they are completely misleading and patently false...I can only assume that the majority of the positive ratings are produced by schills with an agenda in hopes of increasing sales for tripe like this...the concept of the film is utterly moronic, the execution is completely unrealistic, the skipping around from one meaningless scene to another that have almost no bearing on the movie is beyond annoying....just one more example of the worthless garbage being generated in the name of so-called entertainment by an industry that has clearly no idea what a good movie should be....pathetic

An Occasional Hell (1996)

aptly named film

[3/10 · 6 April 2017]

film is aptly named because once in a while you come across a film which provides an occasional hell to have to watch...actually this one would be highly recommended for viewing by an arborist- wooden plot, wooden script, wooden acting, etc, etc, etc....I like tom berenger, but this is the equivalent of painting by numbers on steroids...and not even the nude scenes can help this turkey, but I can highly recommend it if you want to have a nice nap mid-movie, then wake up not feeling as though you missed anything...berenger's imaginary visits by the female missing from the crime scene are particularly annoying and ridiculous and add absolutely nothing to the plot...all in all such drivel that I was compelled to stop watching a little over halfway through, which after reading the reviews, turned out to be a wise move...the people advocating this disaster as a triumph are in need of god knows what, but taste comes forefront to my mind

Arrival (II) (2016)

Oh my god....seriously?Dead On Arrival more appropriate

[1/10 · 16 January 2017]

I thought with someone like forest whitaker that this movie must probably be pretty good....wrong!...from the very first scene where the woman is touching her baby's nose, and it starts wailing, I thought to myself that this is one lousy beginning...and all I could think is that this is how a liberal from Hollywood would start a movie to show compassion and feelings...how special...the entire precept that the military would need a college professor to unravel the language used by an alien race is so stupid it boggles the mind...then it just gets more and more ludicrous, unrealistic, and nascently idiotic as the film progresses...after about an hour of hoping I was wrong and that something would happen to change my mind, I decided I had better check reviews here on IMDb...and to my amazement, the movie had a rating of 8.3?????are you kidding me?...what is that about?...but after reading a few reviews saying the movie is a masterpiece...reviews which clearly have an agenda...I got into the real reviews and quickly discovered just what a total turkey this thing really is....long story short...I didn't bother to finish the last 45 minutes and trashed it, coming here and writing this review which hopefully will keep others from wasting their time on this godawful trash.

Just Business (2008 Video)

Movie is an easy 6 out of 10

[6/10 · 13 August 2016]

Interesting look at the interplay between two detectives investigating a heist from a rich mans art collection...very smartly scripted with good quality actors playing believable roles that do not insult your intelligence...Good screenplay and very good shots...all in all a good quality movie...don't believe the low rating..it is balderdash...also this business of not being able to submit a review unless it has 10 lines is stupid...but these are their rules and so I must say something else here to satisfy their rules.well, once again they will not let me submit without more lines...really?...give me a break...maybe I should start relating green eggs and ham like ted cruz did during his filibuster...honestly this rule is so stupid..I have said everything I wanted to say, and kept it succinct for a reason...but lets give it another try and see if these people will allow me to submit...ridiculous rule

The Salvation (2014)

One of the Best westerns ever

[9/10 · 7 August 2016]

It does not necessarily have to be a western...I just love any really good and well made movie whatever the genre...but I feel compelled to write a review of this movie in particular...

The first time I watched it I was well pleased with it...although I was initially dismayed by the opening dialogue, which was foreign(Danish?)...but because it seemed so well shot and the scenery was so well devised, I decided I would watch it even if there wasn't a word of English in it...There was a definite sense of quality right from the getgo..and I felt even if I did not understand a word, the action would pretty much tell the story, being a western and all...Well, I was glad I stuck with it, because about 5-10 minutes in, everyone began speaking in English which was a relief....

However, it was the second time watching the movie about a month later that it finally became clear just what a fine piece of work this film really is..It is all there...everything you want in a memorable movie...just the kind of effort that makes you want to watch it multiple times, because each time you find something else you did not notice the time before...One thing that really impressed me about it was the wonderful music..a plaintive Spanish guitar riffing most of the time with very tasteful violins in the background...really excellent music score...and the obvious spaghetti western influence was also there..but done tastefully and sparingly..not heavyhanded at all....ALL the characters were topflight and the dialogue and screenplay NEVER insults your intelligence...Everything was done tastefully and just the way you would want it from a historical perspective...just the right amount of dirt on everyone's face, just the right macho countenance from the actors, all the right accoutrements and firearms...all perfectly done.

I am looking forward to the next viewing in perhaps another few months from now...I am sure I will find even more to be pleased about...These type of high quality movies are FEW and FAR BETWEEN these days, and I intend to savor each and every viewing in the future..

The Revenant (I) (2015)

Classic Movie

[10/10 · 14 March 2016]

This is a movie that the people involved can be very proud of...it just doesn't get any better...every aspect was carefully thought out and executed to perfection...Some of the scenes were a tad forced, such as crawling into the dead horse to stay warm, and would have been a little better if the director had emphasized that the temperature had gotten so low that something like that had been absolutely necessary to stay alive, and a few other minor points as well...but overall a really great and realistically executed movie...Movies of this exceptional quality do not come around very often and it a relief that they can still be made at all...I must say that this is the first Decapprio movie I have seen I have actually liked...and boy was it something!!!But strangely enough, as good as the movie was...I still don't feel like I need to see it again, the true mark of a good movie...so I am a little confused about that...am also confused why so many seem to hate the flick...but I suppose that is just proof that the reviews for movies on IMDb just cant be trusted

Shutter Island (2010)

I cant believe it

[2/10 · 3 February 2016]

Whatever this movie is about, other than completely confusing the viewer, I fail to see it...this has to be about the most convoluted mess from Hollywood yet...and I don't buy the introspective "meaning" this movie is supposed to portray for 2 seconds...its just a jumbled mess of non sequitur scenes all pasted together, with misleading red herrings to help confuse it even further...what is the ulterior motive of this jumbled mess?...nothing...there is no meaning whatsoever...apparently we are introduced into the mind of a killer trying to escape reality, during which we as viewers are also expected to go insane...no thanks...I will hold on to my sanity if you don't mind...it's the only thing that allows me to recognize farce and distinguish it from quality, which this movie lacks completely...nice try though

Do Not Disturb (1965)

Not a satisfying vehicle for doris

[24 December 2015]

I am a big doris fan, but the disappointment for me started with the clutzy and mindlessly simple intro song, followed by a poor opening scene concerning learning how to calculate a taxi fee in British sterling...the movie really never does get off the ground, and just becomes an endless stringing together of one boring scene after another...the scene with the fox was amusing, and Doris's figure in the shimmering gown during the party scene was nice, but pretty much everything else left me cold and wishing I was watching pillow talk instead....worth watching, but only once, that is if you can stay awake.

Fear the Walking Dead (2015–2023)

mercenary garbage

[2/10 · 24 August 2015]

OK...American movie channel has a bit hit with the walking dead...but now to make a spin off while walking dead still continues??...they want to cash in on another zombie series...total greed...and the fear the walking dead Pilot was so boring I literally fell asleep about two thirds the way through...boring with absolutely no imagination...nothing new or excitingly different at all...just boring family dynamics we have seen 500000 times in every other movie or series...the zombies aren't even as good as the ones in walking dead...so what is the point of this unimaginative trash....$$$$$$....that's what!!!...I won't waste my time any further with subsequent episodes...although admittedly it has nowhere to go but up....but I would rather spend time more judiciously...like cleaning the fish tank..if I owned one that is....

The Grey (2011)

Another disservice to the animal kingdom

[2/10 · 16 March 2015]

I am giving this movie a 2 based on the fact that Liam Neeson is a good actor...but that is the only thing this movie seems to have going for it...No matter how pertinent this screenplay may be towards justifying our own existence as human beings, is it really necessary to do so at the expense of the wild kingdom?..I am so sick and tired of seeing animals vilified, abused,and/or slaughtered simply because they are predators..for instance this History channel series Swamp people, where alligators are relentlessly hunted and murdered just because they are an efficient predator, and therefore something to "be feared" and discriminated against..it is sickening to see....it is a well known fact that the entire ecosystem breaks down when top predators are eliminated from the system..same thing with sharks in the seas..soon we will deplete the oceans of thousands of species we hunt on a regular basis until that entire ecosystem breaks down as well...To be perfectly honest- I have not even seen this ridiculous movie- nor do I intend to...but it was obvious from the start that the precept of wolves pack hunting humans is absurd..I don't even think wolves would eat a dead human because they hate the scent of us so much...as far as I am concerned, it appears that the human race was put here on earth to abuse and eradicate all natural life, because you see, we are the "intelligent" ones that deserve to occupy this planet ALONE...which is of course an impossibility...