Change Your Image
davj292-1
Reviews
Magicians (2007)
Brief chuckles but falls way short of peep show and 'mildly' entertaining
I've just got back from seeing Mithcell and Webb's new 'out of this world, hilarious' movie and I have to say I'm more than disappointed.
Firstly, the format is very tepid, with the old 'two mates fall out and then compete against each other before coming together to succeed in the end'...reminds me quite of a Will Ferrell film. Its predictable down to a tee and doesn't drawn you in at all.
Its fair to say there are no 'laff-out-loud' moments at all, with the biggest cheer (apart from the one in my head when the credits started) coming from the sight of a 'stooge' practising his fake laugh and trip. Sums it up really....
Sure, Mitchell and Webb work well together and give the film a little extra (god help us if they hadn't been in it) but overall, considering this was written by the same team as the great Peep Show, this is very poor with very little to shout about.....
Stick to telly guys!
Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby (2006)
If you thought Dodgeball was bad..............
We got to see this in Manchester as a free sneak preview before it was released, and by god am I glad it was free!!! To have paid for this tripe would have been daylight robbery and just pure fraud by everyone connected to it!!
I'll start with the plot. Its extremely wafer thin and has about as much depth to it as my sister's blow up paddling pool. Secondly, it has been so Americanised its unreal. Not a scene passed without us in the cinema having some form of American patriotism shoved down our throats. The characters were unbelievably shallow, which you can probably blame on Will Ferrell's atrocious acting. And yes, I blame him for ALL the character's being terrible. That is the measure of my hatred for him. Why this guy gets paid millions at a time to be total, utter s**t I do not know
And Finally, it wasn't funny in the slightest. Sure there were one or two little bits where we chuckled briefly, but I was never hooked and wanting more. I wanted to go home. I wanted to die.
So to sum up, this is an extremely high concept film which never came even close to entertaining me. If you like glancing at your watch every 30 seconds and being able to predict the ending before the opening credits have finished, this is the one for you !!
FernGully: The Last Rainforest (1992)
Political Magic
I first watched Ferngully when I was about 8, and I remember loving it it bits. The characters were so fun to watch, sing-a-long with and interact with.
Now 16, I found a copy of it in my cupboard while having a clear out and I just had to watch it again. This time though, I saw the inner story. This film is just so obviously a message from the American government "YOYR RUINING OUR WORLD PEOPLE" and aren't they just right. If this film was to be MORE political, there would have to be American Soccer style banners moving across the screen in the middle of the film advertising bins.
The film was still enjoyable to watch, Tim Curry's Hexxus still not losing its s**t scary look and growling voice. Live On Ferngully
Thir13en Ghosts (2001)
What the ****
This is not for the weak at heart, and not for reasons that you would relate to a 'horror' film.
The film is an atrocious blend of poor poor acting and a poor poor plot. There is no spark in the film at all, crackling along to its under-par and un-horror movie like ending (what ever happened to classic horror films, why in this day of age do we have a machine powering a house which powers the ghosts)
There was one bright spark in this film, and that was having the "lanky guy out of Scream" in it. I wanted to turn over from the first ten minutes or so, but managed to see it through.
Also, in general, what has happened to horror these days. Film makers used to churn out brilliant films week in week out (The Excorcist and Don't Look Now in the same year tells the story). Now-a-days all they can muster is watered down (so it can get a 12A rating), flimsy stories about a family who move to a house in a wood which has been dead for years and the thing in the trees chases them for a bit until they shoot it !!!! SHOOT A GHOST !!!! SHOOT ME IF YOU LIKE !!!
Well I hope I've avoided offending anyone in this report, but the fact that horror in general is on its last legs and ready to die off completely can not be ignored. Bring back NICHOLAS ROEG
I give this 'thing' 1 out of 10. I have to say its a shame they don't do a 0
Don't Look Now (1973)
Dosing, but still pretty good
The first film I've seen which has had me dosing off while watching it, hoping for the lesson to end (film studies you see) but still I come away craving to order it off the internet.
Sat there, doing my report, I put things like 'lacks direction', 'going no-where', 'boring' and 'waste of cinema goers money'. On the final report I was writing things like 'twists and turns the audience so many different ways', 'pulsating' and 'return of the classic horror film'.
To be honest the film did lack some direction in the middle with no definite plot, no definite thing to grab hold of. It seemed to sail along like one of those boats on the Venice canal without exciting me or without, to be honest, SERIOUSLY boring me. I sat in hope of the next scene blasting into life but carried on disappointed.
The ending certainly did blast into life, but for the sake of avoiding a spoiler, I'll just say it took me two or three minutes after thinking it over to get my head round what had happened and why.
Only when you look back on this film do u realise how good and clever it is, the editing being a HUGE factor into making it what it is. There are no really scary scenes, although the ending made me jump, but the use of lighting, editing etc.. makes it scary and unnerving. I dosed through the film, but still I give it a good 7 out of 10